Premium cabin seats have come a long way, and for over a couple of decades now we’ve seen fully flat seats on commercial planes. It used to be that just first class had fully flat beds… and then business class… and now we have business class seats with doors.
Delta A350 business class (with door)
I’d say this raises a lot of etiquette questions. While airlines want you to make yourself at home in fully flat beds, perhaps you shouldn’t do everything you’d do in your bed at home.
For example, on the most basic level there’s the question of what it’s appropriate to wear when you go to sleep on a plane. On one end of the spectrum, I’m amused by the business travelers on a New York to London flight who sleep in their slacks and button down.
On the other end of the spectrum, hopefully people wear more than just their birthday suit (and ideally more than underwear) when sleeping on planes.
Okay, that’s actually a tangent, I guess, as the real point of this post is to answer this question that was posted by Jayceegee in the Ask Lucky forum, about another airplane bed etiquette question:
I appreciate your excellent posts regarding traveling as an LGBT couple in the Middle East, as well as your review of Qatar’s QSuite product.
If you and Ford were to travel together in QSuite, would you feel comfortable asking to share the double bed? My husband and I are booking travel with them, and want to know the level of risk of we were to politely request to share the suite.
There are three airlines with “double beds” on planes — China Eastern, Qatar Airways, and Singapore Airlines. Of those countries (China, Qatar, and Singapore), Qatar no doubt has the strictest laws against homosexuality.
So, would I feel comfortable sleeping in the double bed next to Ford? Yes, 100%. First of all, keep in mind Qsuites doesn’t offer a true double bed — there are still separate footwells, so you’re not able to spoon (at least not for your bottom half).
Qatar Qsuites double bed
However, personally I wouldn’t recommend any sort of Public Displays of Affection. Not because you’re gay, but because Qatar has laws against PDA (heck, in Qatar it’s appropriate for same sex people to greet one another with a kiss on the cheek, while it’s not appropriate for opposite sex people).
Don’t get me wrong, it’s highly unlikely you’d be “policed” in this way, but if your goal is to be 100% cautious, then it makes sense to avoid that.
While I can’t imagine it would ever come to this, I sort of wonder if giving someone a kiss before going to sleep on a plane qualifies as PDA? You’re in a suite with a door, though the door isn’t so high, and people can still look over it. So technically if you give your spouse (gay or straight) a peck on the cheek, is that PDA (specifically, the “public” part of “PDA”)? I don’t know.
Like I said, that’s theoretical.
But seriously, there’s absolutely nothing to be ashamed of sleeping next to whoever your travel companion is in Qsuites (whether it’s your girlfriend, husband, cousin, grandma, former professor, sidepiece, stuffed animal, or whatever).
The only thing I’d note — gay or straight — is that PDA isn’t allowed in Qatar, so you can decide for yourself how “public” Qsuites is.
So my advice: yes, sleep next to anyone, but no PDA.
Where do you guys stand on this?
Qatar frequently offers excellent fares for business class, even in Qsuites, or you can redeem American AAdvantage miles at a great value.
The one thing people don't get about the Middle East dictatorships is that if they don't like you for whatever reason THEY WILL ALWAYS FIND SOMETHING TO CHARGE YOU WITH so even if you don't kiss or do whatever else is easiest to be charged with if they want you beheaded they will ALWAYS get it done
I have flown Qatar business class a lot and have another flight booked this week. While they are a Middle Eastern airline, 95% of the cabin crew are from Eastern Europe and Asian countries. I never give a second thought to the crew. I would be cautious with other passengers but with Q Suites none of the other passengers can tell what you are doing in them. Not saying I would cuddle or spoon but I would not be worried about sharing the double bed with my partner.
@Nico
You functionally illiterate tool.
Isn't there some Taliban-based travel site where you'd find content more in line with your personal bigotry?
I flew the Etihad Apartments with a gay male friend (I’m a gay man) and the flight attendant asked if we’d like to shower together! We declined, of course, but it was pretty hilarious thing to happen on a Middle Eastern airline!
Thanks for this post. I was actually interested in booking a Q suite for my husband and I. However I didn’t realize until I read another post that flying through Doha and on to Asia requires two separate awards. So no Q suite for us instead we will be flying Cathay Pacific
Random thoughts...just my 2¢, worth far less (no doubt), so feel free to keep the change.
@The Nice Paul ---> While I certainly see the advantage of your attire, it only makes sense (to me) if you *don't* "have to hit the ground running," so to speak, or if there's an Arrival Lounge where you can shower and dress. Obviously I'm thinking of red-eyes here, but I've never really slept on westbound flights from Europe...
Random thoughts...just my 2¢, worth far less (no doubt), so feel free to keep the change.
@The Nice Paul ---> While I certainly see the advantage of your attire, it only makes sense (to me) if you *don't* "have to hit the ground running," so to speak, or if there's an Arrival Lounge where you can shower and dress. Obviously I'm thinking of red-eyes here, but I've never really slept on westbound flights from Europe to the US, where it's daylight the whole way.
@Janet ---> I understand how leggings are comfortable...or so say my wife and my daughters, but (aside from compression socks) I, too avoid tight clothing and prefer natural fibers, though in my case, it's cotton.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
@Lucky ---> I don't think it matters if one is in a Qsuite, a closed door suite on Singapore, or China Eastern. Indeed, I don't care if it's a flight on easyJet from Ibiza to Gatwick! There is a limit to how much PDA is acceptable -- gay or straight is irrelevant. It is, after all, a PUBLIC Display of Affection; the "P" does not stand for "Private." Aside from the desire among those with overactive hormones to join the Mile High Club, most people realize/remember they are in a public place: there is an appropriate time and place for everything...onboard an aircraft at 38,000 feet isn't one of them.
There is nothing wrong with kissing your partner good night...but (IMHO) save the lovemaking for private moments -- your home, your hotel, that *truly* secluded beach, or that swingers party this weekend. There is NEVER that much "seclusion" onboard a plane -- even in the restroom, people are going to hear you. Plus you have the people standing in line for *other* reasons waiting for you to finish...
So unless you want your exploits spread all over YouTube -- and the odds for that are pretty good! --I would council patience and discretion.
When traveling it's only traveling.
Portable Disease Affection is dreadful and completely unnecessary. Also pj's? So lame. Have a perfect functional shower before flying and if the case perform your own things. Please, you all sound like being civil is remote to your vocabulary.
How do you get the double bed assigned? On my flight from ORD-DOH-Bangalore they seem to block out the double beds in advance.
@ Abe -- They should be able to assign them if you call.
@ Janet
Everyone’s different but I’d avoid anything tight-fitting, so “leggings” would be a no-no for me.
My go-to flying gear consists of loose-fitting, very lightweight merino wool items (I mostly buy stuff from the New Zealand company Icebreaker, but there are lots of others).
This stuff is designed to be layered - which is really helpful if you end up on a plane kept at a sweat-box temperature rather than my preferred icebox....
@ Janet
Everyone’s different but I’d avoid anything tight-fitting, so “leggings” would be a no-no for me.
My go-to flying gear consists of loose-fitting, very lightweight merino wool items (I mostly buy stuff from the New Zealand company Icebreaker, but there are lots of others).
This stuff is designed to be layered - which is really helpful if you end up on a plane kept at a sweat-box temperature rather than my preferred icebox. It absorbs moisture and odours - which sounds disgusting but is useful during, say, a London-Perth flight, the longest I currently do. Cotton just absorbs sweat and holds it against your skin; manmade fibres don’t even absorb the sweat (and usually make you sweat more).
Basically I am wearing adult pyjamas for the whole journey. This wouldn’t suit those OMAAT readers who think people should dress formally before travelling in premium cabins. But after years of ULH work trips, that’s what works for me.
Oh, and airline pyjamas sound great but they rarely fit well, often have limited size options, and changing in a tiny plane toilet is almost impossible unless you’re child-sized!
@Ivan I am going to be anxiously awaiting your next blog post on this topic.
People may remember that, when Virgin still had the A380 in mind, Richard talked about installing casinos and double beds, and said Virgin would be the only airline where you can score twice during a flight...
Where do you guys stand on this - I guess you meant gays. As a straight person the last thing on a plane is to see these couples sharing qsuite. It is not normal, hide the love for private hotel apartment or anything else. Thanks
I once saw a girl give her man a BJ on Qatar, across the aisle while taxiing out from LHR.
I guess a little “thanks for the trip, honey”.
Was all highly amusing watching her bob up and down underneath the blanket - whilst he sat rigid - until she reached for the sick bag and spat out the proceeds.
They left the sick bag in the seat back pocket for the entire flight.
Could we have an article on etiquette while travelling solo on a lie-flat? The amenity kits come with some pretty high-end lotions and things.
#YOLO
Thanks for the excellent reply! My husband and I are not at all prone to PDA in general, so we should be good to go! We are booked in the double-bed Q suite for 3/4 legs between JFK and BKK. We wanted to make sure we could also experience the bar in the a380 at least once before they start reducing the number of routes.
Thanks!
-JCG
"It’s really no ones business what you do in Q suites or in any other twin bed set up esp if you are paying full fare." - umm no just no. Its not your private bedroom. It is still a public place. Other people paid to be in that cabin as well so its certainly not a free for all, so there are limits.
Those examples got real weird real quick...
Debit is horny online again :)
"If you're US citizens... do whatever you want."
"It's no one's business... if you're paying full fare."
Seriously, I would LOL at your tearful plea for mercy from a prison in a Muslim country. #uglyamerican
@JB: Recently I was in QSuites and (unaware they were cabin cameras) engaged in some under-the-covers hijinx with my girlfriend. FAs may have known but treated us no differently the rest of the flight, or afterwards.
Thanks for the comments about what to wear. I’m flying Air Canada and don’t think they provide pajamas. I think I’ll just stay in my legging-ish pants and shirt.
Thank you so very much for addressing this. Funny, we (my wife and I) fall at the other end. We actually never share "suites." We usually are in separate pods. We are extremely affectionate at home and in private situations, but do not ever want to give anyone an excuse to take any action against us. "Turning a blind eye" cannot ever replace "protection under the law." We are on their turf. Stand back, Be...
Thank you so very much for addressing this. Funny, we (my wife and I) fall at the other end. We actually never share "suites." We usually are in separate pods. We are extremely affectionate at home and in private situations, but do not ever want to give anyone an excuse to take any action against us. "Turning a blind eye" cannot ever replace "protection under the law." We are on their turf. Stand back, Be respectful and discreet. Their notions of Justice are quite removed from ours.
Gym shorts and a t-shirt...that's what I wear...I stay covered with the blanket and I wear this in all classes of travel..
Typically folks wear slacks to sleep in business class, while first class is allowed to wear airline and TSA Approved pajamas. Enjoy your flight Janet .
That looks very executive and high tech! :)
Of course the laws of the airlines registered country apply in international airspace. I once spent 3 years in Qatar’s federal prison for kissing my grandmother 200 miles before landing at LAX. They landed the plane on a remote island to refuel and returned to Qatar for my hearing. Be careful folks.
If you are US citizens My advice would be to do whatever you want. Enjoy yourselves. It’s 2019 and same sex couples are accepted by modern civilization.
Would doing something under the sheets with the door closed count as PDA? That's not really "public" and as long as your not disturbing anyone I assume it should be ok. Can anyone provide their side?
While I realize it's F and not C...The new F suites on SQ look like the only "real" option for true intimacy when you join two of them together. It's an aspiration flight for me (and my significant other) this year for just that reason.
@Janet some airlines provide PJs in business (i.e. Qantas) which are useful to keep for future flights. Do a quick google for the airline you're flying with to see what they provide in business. If no PJs, I would suggest picking some up for yourself.
I think we all know how to behave at public places ( including air travel but still high mile club does exist ) so what are you trying to preach here ?
Most Qatar crews, that I've come across, aren't actually from Qatar and don't believe in the same laws of the country was such so i guess they'd just turn a blind eye or wouldn't care.
It's really no ones business what you do in Q suites or in any other twin bed set up esp if you are paying full fare. What in the hell did the airlines think would happen Also I would love to see a law suit if they ever used camera footage to prosecute which i really doubt would happen. No expectation of privacy due to so called safety concerns.
Hmmm, I never knew that Qatar prohibited PDA, I’ve definitely given my wife a kiss before snoozing off. Both in QSuites and Regular business class
I am flying business class soon on a 15 hour long flight. What DO people wear to sleep?
@ Jon
PDA means Public Dispay of Affection- exactly what Ben meant
A bud of mine flew home next to a guy and his Russian bride once. Said they made out the whole 4 hours. That would be annoying. On a plane you do have 150 Plus close personal friends, and not everyone will be ok with anything more than seeing a quick peck on the lips.
Cousin? Side piece?
A little sense of humor makes this blog so much more fun and personalto read compared to T̶h̶e̶p̶o̶i̶n̶t̶s̶g̶u̶y̶ other blogs.
Does someone wanna explain PDA? The only thing I can think of I'm sure isn't what Ben means.
Wow, its like giving money to fly in a Catholic School.
I know my mom and I "shared" the double bed. Got the cushioned divider put it and everything - it provides extra space! Did they know we were mother and daughter? Not sure.
QSuites are monitored via cameras fixed high in the cabin. You can sometimes see the staff at their stations watching the feeds.