My Mom’s Suffering Is Over: Reflecting On The Best Of Times, Worst Of Times

My Mom’s Suffering Is Over: Reflecting On The Best Of Times, Worst Of Times

808

Before I get into this, let me say that this is more of a personal post, so if you’re simply here for travel content, please skip this post (though there’s a travel angle). I’ve been blogging for well over 17 years, and I’ve shared my highs and lows here. In recent years, Ford and I have had some highs, with the birth of our two healthy sons, who make us smile every day.

But unfortunately it’s time to share a (selfish) low. The day I’ve been dreading for well over six years is finally here — my mom’s battle with cancer came to an end early this morning, and all of her pain and suffering has been taken away. She outlived any expectation that we had when she first got her diagnosis, but that doesn’t make it any easier for those of us she left behind.

I’m happy for her. I know she has been looking forward to seeing my oldest brother (among others) in heaven, who she has missed dearly, since he died in an accident at a young age. But that doesn’t take away my pain, because it sure feels like a piece of me has gone with her…

My mom was a remarkable, one-of-a-kind woman

Before I even talk about my mom’s cancer battle, let me just talk a little about my mom. I was blessed with such an unconditionally loving and supportive mom. Perhaps what sums up my mom’s nature more than anything is her love for kids. 

My mom with Miles & Jet (and Winston photobombing)

She always told me that when she was younger, she wanted to have a dozen kids, and how nice it would be to have them all at the dinner table every night. She was always so loving, nurturing, and full of life. While Ford and I were excited when we had kids, I think my mom was even more excited. Her eyes just lit up when she saw them, and she could play with them for hours.

Miles loved having out with “baba!”
“Baba” is happy she got to meet baby brother Jet

Despite my mom being significantly weakened due to her cancer, nothing could stop her from playing with them, and they brought her to life, and took away her pain. She had energy with them as if she wasn’t even sick. I’ll forever cherish the time they had together.

But that’s only the start of my mom’s traits. She was also generous and stubborn. Even though she didn’t necessarily have that much, she would give the shirt off her back to anyone who needed it. And speaking of stubbornness, goodness would we get into fights over who was allowed to pay for things. I like to treat my parents to things as a small way of giving back to them for what they did for me, but she would argue with me to no end, and only agree if she could pay for something herself.

“Can we go to XYZ to eat?” “Only if I can invite you,” she’d always say. What she forgot is that I got my stubbornness from her, so more often than not, I’d win. Like, if she visited us and we didn’t let her pay for something, she’d text me on the drive home saying “check in the drawer next to the bed,” or something.

She also had such a love for life. Even on some of her worst days, she’d still point out all the things that made her happy and that she was grateful for.

My mom’s six plus year ovarian battle cancer

I remember Mother’s Day 2019 like it was yesterday. The Thursday before Mother’s Day, I was in Savannah, and got a call from my mom that she was in the ER, because she had unbearable pain. She had been complaining of pain for some time, but despite multiple visits to doctors prior to that, no one could figure out what she had.

I immediately flew home, and by the time Sunday rolled around, she was diagnosed with advanced ovarian cancer. It was clear she had virtually no chance of complete remission, it was just a function of how long her life could be extended through chemotherapy and other treatments.

I’ll never forget Mother’s Day 2019…

Our expectations were set pretty clearly, that she probably wouldn’t be around for long at all, and possibly had months to live. But she tried some aggressive treatments, and they managed to keep her alive longer than anyone had expected.

For a long time, she had good quality of life. She just had such a will to live. We never thought she’d live to meet our first son, let alone still be in his life when he was three years old. She was even around to meet our second son, and I know how much that meant to her (and us). In many ways, I think they helped motivate her to fight for so long.

I won’t bore you guys with all the details, but while her condition obviously continued to deteriorate over time, she had pretty good quality of life through 2024, on and off. Don’t get me wrong, it was an absolute roller coaster, since it’s not like things were consistent. On multiple occasions, she had been given a couple of months to live, only to then have another treatment work on her.

However, in 2024, she got to the point where she was weak and out of options, so she entered (at-home) hospice. My mom is a fighter, and she spent around a year in hospice. Even without any treatments, she still stuck around longer than anyone expected. I think that was largely motivated by hoping to meet our younger son, since she didn’t think she’d be around for his birth. My mom’s pain tolerance is on a completely different level, so while she had bad pain for a long time, it became unbearable in recent weeks.

Around two weeks ago I was talking to my mom on the phone, and she said “it’s my time, I can’t handle the pain anymore.” She had never said that before to me. I knew that day was coming, and I knew it was what was best for her, but I couldn’t help but just instantly have tears running down my face upon hearing that. At that point I knew her days were numbered.

Things deteriorated significantly over the weekend — she fell and broke her hip (as mentioned above, my mom was a stubborn person who never wanted to help from anyone, and she went to the bathroom alone at night, rather than asking for help), and had to be brought to the ER. It’s incredible how people know when it’s their time. In a way, it felt like she set her own timeline there.

My mom had the best time of her life in recent years

I am grateful beyond words that I’ve had as much time with my mom as I did. Many people lose their loved ones from one second to the next, and don’t even get to say goodbye. We were lucky enough to have so much time with her.

My mom always said that the best years of her life were since she was diagnosed with cancer. For one, something like cancer makes you so much more grateful to just be able to wake up every day and be alive, and she lived with that gratitude every single day. Whether it was something small, like enjoying a sunrise with a cup of coffee, or an ice cream, or something big, like a trip, she was always so grateful.

But second, we’ve also done everything we can to take her on as many trips as possible, and to have as many special moments as possible. You know the phrase “live every moment as if it’s your last?” That’s kind of how I tried to approach things, with respect to her.

So we took a countless number of trips with her, always thinking they’d be our last. I remember special trips to Big Sur, Hawaii, Greece, Germany, and so many more destinations.

Fun at Alila Ventana Big Sur in 2021!

I also can’t count the number of times that I’ve visited her. Miami to Tampa is my most flown route, and the reason I always flew that was to see her. I don’t know how many months I’ve collectively spent “living” with her, just enjoying each others’ company, playing cards, and more.

I’m so grateful that as she passes, I really don’t think I could’ve reasonably done more to make the most of our time. So there’s a joy in knowing that I did my best, and that I’m so blessed to have been able to say goodbye in this way, because so many people don’t have that opportunity. I’m also so lucky to have the flexibility to be able to work from anywhere and to have a supportive family (they made so many sacrifices as well), since most people wouldn’t have the ability to do that, and I don’t take it for granted.

Goodness, did we have some fun travels in recent years!

The past six years have also been impossibly challenging

While I’m so grateful I’ve had so much time with my mom, I have to be honest — finding the right balance when you have a loved one with terminal cancer is so complicated. Back when my mom was first diagnosed, many people who had been in similar situations kindly reached out with advice. The advice was all over the place, but one thing was consistent — it’s not easy.

I just had such a hard time with this, because I’ve always been so close to my mom. Ultimately we’re all only on this earth for so long, so I suppose the clock is ticking for all of us. But if you have a terminal cancer diagnosis, that timeline is even more condensed.

Hindsight is of course 20/20, and if I had known my mom would be around for over six years, I might’ve planned things differently. But I always approached things as if the end was very near, because that’s what we thought. We never imagined she’d have as much time as she did.

There’s no denying that in the past several years, I’ve sort of lost myself a bit. Focusing on a sick relative is all-consuming. I’m not just talking about the actual amount of time spent with her, but even more the mental bandwidth it takes up. There probably hasn’t been a waking hour since my mom became sick that I didn’t think about my limited time left with her.

And honestly, this takes a toll on other aspects of life. It’s tough on relationships, friendships, etc., because you put other things on the back burner, but when this lasts from your late 20s to your mid 30s, that’s a big chunk of life. Since my mom was diagnosed, I haven’t planned a single trip that far in advance, since I always assumed the end would be near.

I’m really sorry for the people I’ve failed and let down in recent years, because I’ve just felt so overwhelmed and distracted by this situation. Hopefully I can start a new chapter, and can go back to being a bit more focused on other things. While my mom’s cancer diagnosis feels like it was yesterday, the concept of living life without thinking about her cancer also feels foreign, and like it’s from a different life. 

The past six plus years have been a wild ride

Saying goodbye was worse than I could’ve expected

Given how much lead time we’ve had, I thought I was mentally prepared for my mom’s passing. I think I did everything I could, she had several incredible and unforgettable years, and she said she was ready to go. What more could anyone ask for?

In my head, I can’t count the number of times I played out how the end would go. I didn’t want to think about it, but I couldn’t help myself. Selfishly, I dreaded losing her. But no matter how hard I tried, or how bad I made it out in my head, I wasn’t prepared.

I’ve spent the entire week with her leading up to her passing, first at a hospital, then in an ambulance, and then in a hospice facility. I even slept on the couch next to her at hospice, and I think I collectively slept maybe 15 minutes last night, as I just listened to her breathing, as she came down from her terminal restlessness.

Nightmare doesn’t even begin to describe what it’s like to watch someone suffer and then pass in this way. It’s just so unbelievably painful, and the phases go from bad to worse. If there’s any silver lining, she passed in peace, and now her suffering is over.

Give your loved ones a hug, be kind, and take that trip

I haven’t even started processing how I feel, so I’m hardly in a position to give anyone advice (at least as of now) on how to deal with losing a loved one. However, I do have a few things to say.

First, give your loved ones an extra hug, and tell them you love them. If you’ve been thinking about taking a trip and/or spending quality time with a loved one, take that trip, and spend quality time with them. You won’t regret it (well, don’t be irresponsible, but other than that…) — you’re much more likely to regret the things that you didn’t do than the things you did do.

Second, there’s so much suffering in the world, so we really need to all be better at being kind to one another. I feel like I’ve just gone through a complete nightmare, but this is something that so many people have to deal with.

I’ve lost people before, but not like this. As much as my mother died too young, at least it was me saying goodbye to her, and not the other way around (as she had to say goodbye to my oldest brother). And I’m so lucky, because so many people have been in so much worse situations. The suffering out there is endless, so always show compassion and kindness when you can.

Lastly, the past several years have made me so incredibly grateful for any day where I can wake up and just be healthy, spend time with those I love, etc. Our society largely idolizes things like money, power, and fame, when in reality, none of that matters. What matters is having good health (as much as possible), spending quality time with loved ones, doing something for other people, and having the blessing of waking up every day and being able to live another day. 

Hopefully premium cabin award space is better in heaven than on earth

Bottom line

My mom’s long battle with cancer is finally over. She’s now finally in peace and pain free, so the only people who are suffering are those of us she left behind. Thanks for letting me share this here, because this is therapeutic for me (which is why I’m getting this up so quickly).

Honestly, I feel so heartbroken, lost, and confused. I’m sure I’m going to go through a roller coaster of emotions over the coming days, weeks, months, and years, but I at least find comfort in knowing that my mom’s suffering is over.

A huge part of my life has been taken away from me, at least in flesh. But my mom’s amazing spirit and the things she taught me will always stick with me. I also feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, and I hope I can put that into other things in life that matter, including being at least half as good of a parent to my kids as my mom was to me.

PS: As an update to this post, thanks to everyone for their incredibly kind comments. I don’t deserve them, but I do appreciate them, even if they’re only making me cry even more. There’s comfort in that, so thank you. And to those sharing their stories of suffering, loss, and illness, please know that you’re in my thoughts as well.

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  1. Travel-Aficionado Diamond

    Ben, please accept my most sincere and heartfelt condolences on your loss.

  2. SSC Guest

    We once saw all of you at a Caribbean island just a few years back. As readers of your site we recognized you but we didn't say anything because we wanted to give you privacy with your family. We even sat next to your parents on the beach one of the days. I still recall mentioning to my wife how wonderful it was to see you guys have such a good time being together. Blessings to you all.

  3. Joey Diamond

    My sincere condolonces on your loss, Ben. I agree to give our loved ones an extra hug and to simply take that trip!

  4. Georges Guest

    Lots of love to you and your family. You are an amazing son and human being ❤️

  5. V P Guest

    We are with you in this difficult times Ben, my heartful condolences.

  6. P S Guest

    Sending you love and peace, no one ever prepares you for loss of a parent. It’s the most painful feeling I’ve experienced.

  7. Michelle Guest

    Ben - I am sending so much love to you and your family

  8. iamhere Guest

    You can prepare all you want but nothing you do will actually prepare you.

  9. T. Jones Guest

    Having to say goodbye for the last time is never easy, particularly when that person is your mother. I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that it is ok to be sad and relieved at the same time. May you carry your mother's spirit with you wherever you go. It appears she imparted her kindness and wisdom to you. Honor her by continuing to being yourself, the son that brought her so much...

    Having to say goodbye for the last time is never easy, particularly when that person is your mother. I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that it is ok to be sad and relieved at the same time. May you carry your mother's spirit with you wherever you go. It appears she imparted her kindness and wisdom to you. Honor her by continuing to being yourself, the son that brought her so much happiness and joy. Thank you for having the courage to share this difficult experience with your readers. I wish you peace in the days ahead.

  10. InceptionCat Diamond

    I wasn't sure that i was ready to read this but i finally found the strength to. I have cried. What a beautiful beautiful tribute to your wonderful Ma.

    You'll be fine. We're here for you. Ganz liebe Grüße aus München lieber Ben.

  11. Lori G Guest

    We share in your grief. Your Mom was beautiful and clearly had such a beautiful and giving heart. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Thank you for sharing her with us all.

  12. GUWonder Guest

    My heartfelt condolences to you and your family. With great love comes inevitable sadness as life is all too fleeting, but in you lives the love, joy & memories that endure thanks to your mom. May her memory be a blessing.

  13. Bent Guest

    I’ve never cried reading anything online before. Never.

    Until now.

    As someone who also lost his mother way too early, and only got to say goodbye after she was in a coma, I can feel your pain and loss. Also agree with your advice to us all with regards to taking care of our loved ones. Life goes on, but some people leave holes that will never be filled.

    Love,
    Bent

  14. HJay2020 Member

    Ben, just checking in to see how you are doing. It is so very hard to lose a parent. Thinking of you and your family, and sending healing wishes.

  15. rdcolmenares New Member

    Ben:

    My deepest sympathies to you and your family. As a child of aging parents, this is my worst fear. I have been a reader for several years but I have never posted comments. Wish you and your loved ones well during this difficult time. You are right, she is finally free of pain and suffering.

    An avid reader!

  16. robertw Guest

    Sorry to hear about this. My mother also passed form Ovarian Cancer two years ago. For her it was just too advanced.

  17. Flybynight Guest

    I’m sorry for your loss Ben. Your mother sounds like a wonderful person. Thank you for the post reminding us of what we’re here to do; how important it is to love, forgive and just be with each other.

  18. AJO Diamond

    My heartfelt condolences, Ben.

  19. Your fan in HK Guest

    My condolences to you and your family. May your mother RIP. Take good care of yourself and your loved ones.

  20. Robert Guest

    My deepest condolences.
    Your report makes me realize how precious and limited our time here is, and how wonderful it is to see how you've used it.

  21. MJ Guest

    Beautiful & meaningful post, Lucky. Thank you for sharing and reminding us to always cherish the moments with loved ones, and be kind to others. Big virtual hugs to you.

  22. PointsandMilesDoc Gold

    Thank you Lucky for your bravery and vulnerability in sharing. I think this piece would serve other patients and their families well, and I hope you don't mind me sharing. Sending you all the peace and love through this grief.

  23. Castle Guest

    Thank you for sharing something incredibly personal and something that most, if not all of us will have to endure.

  24. Whirlwind2000 Guest

    A lovely tribute to your Mom, but also thank you for sharing your feelings on it to help others going through the same thing to not feel alone in processing their emotions. Be kind to yourself and recognize that you won't wake up one day feeling all better.

  25. jetset Diamond

    So sorry for your loss, Ben, and thank you for sharing. We can never be reminded enough to spend more time with our loved ones so it's always good advice to hear. Hoping you are feeling all the love and warm thoughts from the community pouring out for you.

  26. LAXJeff Guest

    RIP to your mom. I can only imagine how painful writing this post was for you.

  27. Jim Guest

    This is the most beautiful post you've ever written. So sorry for your loss from a long time reader.

  28. Jss Guest

    Ben - as a long time follower and someone who remembers your original post when your mom was diagnosed, I wish you and your family the best right now. Moms are warriors and your mom seemed to be no different. Your blog and your work over the last decades isn't just reflective of your story and your success, its the best reflection of your mom as well. I'm sure it makes her so happy to...

    Ben - as a long time follower and someone who remembers your original post when your mom was diagnosed, I wish you and your family the best right now. Moms are warriors and your mom seemed to be no different. Your blog and your work over the last decades isn't just reflective of your story and your success, its the best reflection of your mom as well. I'm sure it makes her so happy to know the person you've become, not because your blog has been successful but because you seem to be a truly kind and warming person who every mother would be proud to call their son.

  29. Jss Guest

    Ben - as a long time follower and someone who remembers your original post when your mom was diagnosed, I wish you and your family the best right now. Moms are warriors and your mom seemed to be no different. Your blog and your work over the last decades isn't just reflective of your story and your success, its the best reflection of your mom as well. I'm sure it makes her so happy to...

    Ben - as a long time follower and someone who remembers your original post when your mom was diagnosed, I wish you and your family the best right now. Moms are warriors and your mom seemed to be no different. Your blog and your work over the last decades isn't just reflective of your story and your success, its the best reflection of your mom as well. I'm sure it makes her so happy to know the person you've become, not because your blog has been successful but because you seem to be a truly kind and warming person who every mother would be proud to call their son.

  30. Rock Guest

    My thoughts are with you. Thank you for over 12 years of educating us about better and smarter travel. I am sure she is beyond proud of you and your family.

  31. Likes-to-fly Diamond

    I am lost for words, because...
    My deepest condolences, Ben.

  32. snory Member

    My deepest condolences to you and your family, Ben.
    What a meaningful tribute to celebrate her life that you wrote.
    It's kind of a wake up call for me to take my parents to all the bucket-list as they are already in their 70s. Thank you for sharing.

  33. Hill Lee Guest

    We are about the same age, been reading your blog even since you started some 16+ years ago. You are almost like a best friend that I never met. I am sorry, Ben!

  34. Jo Guest

    Heartfelt condolences to Ben and the entire family.

  35. RandomTravel Guest

    Thank you Ben for sharing the devastating news and my deepest, warmest feelings to all of you. I think a lot of us have been dreading this news, as a daily follower of your blog, this was one news I hoped would come as late as possible. And in a way it did, albeir too soon of course.

    All the best for you, Ford, your sons and the rest of your family. We all care very much for you.

  36. DL Guest

    oh god, this is hard. i feel your pain ben. my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer, she had 1 good year and then 2 not so good ones and threw in the towel. that was 2 years ago. the grief comes in waves, it gets better, but the memories remain, and sometimes i think of her more than ever. your mother was obviously wonderful and you must have made her so proud. may her memory be a blessing.

  37. Betty Chan Guest

    Dear Ben,
    Please accept my sincerest condolences on your tremendous loss. I was so moved and cannot contain myself when I read your post as I have just lost my beloved mom a month or so ago. I can totally identified with everything you said about how you feel. What a beautiful tribute! Like you, nothing could ever prepared me for the immense sense of loss I feel when my mom left me. Her...

    Dear Ben,
    Please accept my sincerest condolences on your tremendous loss. I was so moved and cannot contain myself when I read your post as I have just lost my beloved mom a month or so ago. I can totally identified with everything you said about how you feel. What a beautiful tribute! Like you, nothing could ever prepared me for the immense sense of loss I feel when my mom left me. Her passing has left a huge void that no one can fill. I know for a fact that I will still feel the pain every time I realise that my mom is really gone. Someone told me that those we love don’t go away—they walk beside us every day. Ben, I know your mom walks beside you every day, and so is my mom.

    While I do not know you ‘personally’, I truly feel having read your travel blog for years, you have become a friend that I go to for travel advice as you have always been kind, helpful and unbiased. Ben, may you find strength and comfort from the support of your family (Ford, Miles and Jet) around you. My thoughts and prayers are with you!

  38. JJ Guest

    My condolences Ben, you can tell what a bright ray of sunshine she was through the pictures alone

  39. Paul Guest

    Thanks so much for sharing this and for being so honest about your experience. Really sorry for your loss.

  40. Dave Guest

    What an eloquent tribute. You were so wise to spend so much time with her while you could. Blessings and peace to you and your family.

  41. Ryan Guest

    Ben, thank you for the post. This is the first time I’ve commented in over 10 years of reading your blog. I know you said it was therapeutic for you, but it is the perfect reminder for all of us not to take family for granted. We live next door to my parents(Dad-81, Mom-77), and your post was a reality check for me. I will definitely do things differently going forward. Please accept our prayers for you and your family.

  42. Ali Guest

    May she rest in peace. She is in a better place now.
    When I read the title - I was more hopeful that the cancer has gone away.
    Please cherish the memories with your loved ones, you never know what the future holds for you.
    Thank you for sharing with us this post, I've been reading your blog daily for over 10 years (remember the previous aircraft windows picture on the top.)

  43. Justin Guest

    Thanks for sharing with us. I’m sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace.

  44. Keith Guest

    Ben, So sorry for your loss. Thanks so much for sharing that beautiful tribute to your mom and for all the great ways you loved her as a wonderful son.

    We moved with our 4 teenage children from Panama to Texas to be with my parents when my father had brain cancer. We had two hard, but wonderful, years with him before he went to be with the Lord, and just last year we...

    Ben, So sorry for your loss. Thanks so much for sharing that beautiful tribute to your mom and for all the great ways you loved her as a wonderful son.

    We moved with our 4 teenage children from Panama to Texas to be with my parents when my father had brain cancer. We had two hard, but wonderful, years with him before he went to be with the Lord, and just last year we lost my dear mother to cancer also.

    Take your time to grieve and don't rush the process.

    Praying for you and your family:

    “‘“The Lord bless you
 and keep you;
    the Lord make his face shine on you
 and be gracious to you;
    the Lord turn his face toward you
 and give you peace.”’
    Numbers 6:24-26

  45. Alison Guest

    Ben, that was a very moving post. I thank you for writing it and admire you greatly. I wish the best for you and Ford and Miles and Jet. And, I know your mother is happy in Heaven. My husband lost his mother to cancer about the same age as you are when our children were similar ages to yours. Way too soon.

  46. Cody W. Johnson Guest

    Like many, we feel the pain you’re going through mostly because it brings back to life the sense of loss of losing my mother far too soon like your mother. I experienced many of the same nuanced feelings as you described. I didn’t know how we’d be able to move on. All I can say is that, while the tears are still near (5 years ago) the gnawing pain that creeps into your mind each...

    Like many, we feel the pain you’re going through mostly because it brings back to life the sense of loss of losing my mother far too soon like your mother. I experienced many of the same nuanced feelings as you described. I didn’t know how we’d be able to move on. All I can say is that, while the tears are still near (5 years ago) the gnawing pain that creeps into your mind each morning slowly recedes. Just a little bit each day and you begin to regain focus on living forward as they would want. My condolences.

  47. Jason Guest

    A lovely tribute to a lovely soul. So glad I knew her a bit from getting my haircut there when I lived in Tampa back in the late 2000s.

  48. Shay Guest

    So sorry for your loss. I have been reading your website for the past 12 years and I am big fan. It is my first website I visit once I get home every night and I value all your reviews and have used 100's of them over the years or go back to them when I go there. Also, some are inspirations that I end up going to after a couple of years. I remember when you wrote about your mom's diagnosis. May your she rest in peace and may her memory be a blessing for you all.

  49. Htm Guest

    May your mom rest in peace.

  50. Bertrand Guest

    Condoleances Ben. Thank you for sharing, great to see the good memories you have created and shared with your mom. All the best for the next few weeks and months, these are the hardest when one needs to adapt without a loved one. As you wrote, it’s a good opportunity to reach out to old friends, but also make new plans. Stay strong.

  51. Kira Guest

    My condolenses and thank you for sharing.

  52. Jimmy K Gold

    Ben, everyone has said it all already, but sending my very best wishes. May you and your family be in comfort that you truly did everything you possibly could for such an amazingly strong woman, and that she is now in peace is indeed a comfort. What a lucky lady she was to have a son like you :)

  53. Diane Dioguardi Guest

    Ben,
    I also was reading your blog when you told us about your Mother. Thank you for sharing. Though I certainly did not know her, she was always in my thoughts when reading your blogs, as I still do.
    What a wonderful "blog", it brought tears to my eyes.

  54. Graham Squires Guest

    Dear Ben
    I am saddened by the death of your mum and offer my sincere condolences at this time. My wife who is only 63 has been diagnosed with Stage 4 incurable lung cancer and it is heart breaking to see her in this condition. My best to you and your family.

  55. Ley Guest

    There are no words to describe adequately the sorrow of so many of us as your readers (and people who have watched and read as you have shared parts of your life outside of the incredible travel advice over many years) have for you and your extended family on the loss of a dear, dear mother. Having gone through the passing of both my parents, I can state unequivocally that one is never ready, despite...

    There are no words to describe adequately the sorrow of so many of us as your readers (and people who have watched and read as you have shared parts of your life outside of the incredible travel advice over many years) have for you and your extended family on the loss of a dear, dear mother. Having gone through the passing of both my parents, I can state unequivocally that one is never ready, despite trying to plan for their deaths. Your mother's teachings and example of how to live and love will always be a part of you. My hope and prayer is that, as each day passes, the pain will ebb a bit and the joyful memories will come to mind more and more.

  56. Welltravbrit Guest

    I’ve followed you since the Flyertalk days and this is such a beautiful testimony to your mother and your bond. The love was always so evident here. Cancer is hard and it does come with costs but you should be proud of the ways you showed up♥️.

  57. Cinnabom Guest

    I always read your blog but never commented. I just wanted to say I’m truly sorry for your loss. I hope you can find comfort in these words:

    The day my mother died I wrote in my journal, "A serious misfortune of my life has arrived." I suffered for more than one year after the passing away of my mother. But one night, in the highlands of Vietnam, I was sleeping in the hut in...

    I always read your blog but never commented. I just wanted to say I’m truly sorry for your loss. I hope you can find comfort in these words:

    The day my mother died I wrote in my journal, "A serious misfortune of my life has arrived." I suffered for more than one year after the passing away of my mother. But one night, in the highlands of Vietnam, I was sleeping in the hut in my hermitage. I dreamed of my mother. I saw myself sitting with her, and we were having a wonderful talk. She looked young and beautiful, her hair flowing down. It was so pleasant to sit there and talk to her as if she had never died. When I woke up it was about two in the morning, and I felt very strongly that I had never lost my mother. The impression that my mother was still with me was very clear. I understood then that the idea of having lost my mother was just an idea. It was obvious in that moment that my mother is always alive in me.
    I opened the door and went outside. The entire hillside was bathed in moonlight. It was a hill covered with tea plants, and my hut was set behind the temple halfway up. Walking slowly in the moonlight through the rows of tea plants, I noticed my mother was still with me. She was the moonlight caressing me as she had done so often, very tender, very sweet... wonderful! Each time my feet touched the earth I knew my mother was there with me. I knew this body was not mine but a living continuation of my mother and my father and my grandparents and great-grandparents. Of all my ancestors. Those feet that I saw as "my" feet were actually "our" feet. Together my mother and I were leaving footprints in the damp soil.
    From that moment on, the idea that I had lost my mother no longer existed. All I had to do was look at the palm of my hand, feel the breeze on my face or the earth under my feet to remember that my mother is always with me, available at any time." -Thich Naht Hanh

  58. jallan Diamond

    My deepest condolences to you and Ford, Ben. May your mother's memory be a blessing to you all.

  59. Dani Guest

    Sorry for your loss Ben. I met your mum many years ago, and indeed she was a lovely person, nice and gentle and caring. Please give my condolences to Mike as well.

  60. Clem Diamond

    What a poignant post! Thanks for sharing Ben, I'm so sorry for your immense loss and I'm sending my warmest condolences to you and your family. She seemed like a wonderful person, I'm so glad she beat the odds by such a long shot, and that she got to meet the kiddos! Take care of yourself.

  61. Jules Guest

    It’s so clear that you and your family gave your mom so much happiness. She was as blessed to have had you all as you were to have had her. ❤️

  62. Ramsey Guest

    What a beautiful tribute to your lovely Mum. Cherish those amazing happy memories. She was clearly so proud of you X

  63. Oliver Guest

    Thank you for sharing. You honor your mother and you remind us of what is important!

  64. Levaa Gold

    Ben, my heartfelt condolences. Thank you for sharing something so deeply personal, both the pain and the joy. Wishing you strength and peace through this time.

  65. Andy Guest

    Thank you for sharing. With love.

  66. Patrick Guest

    Thank you for sharing. What a beautifully candid and heartfelt post. She is still with you. Watch for the signs:)

  67. MDS Guest

    Lucky, so sorry for your loss and for sharing with us. Your mom was lucky (no pun) to have you as you were to have her.

  68. Lieflat19 Diamond

    Bless you and your family Ben. I've been following you for for over 12 years. Thank you for everything. You've touched more people than you realize. You've helped me do things I could never have imagined. I'm glad someone touched you in such a special way.

  69. Peter Guest

    God bless you Ben. Hugs

  70. coutureguy Guest

    Ben, so sorry about your mom's passing. You've been a great son and I'm sure she couldn't have been more proud. Hold on to the comforting thought that she's no longer in pain. You and your family are in my prayers.

    J

  71. Steve Finn Guest

    Condolences. May her memory be a blessing.

  72. Nicholas Ohrn Guest

    My mother died of cancer in June of this year after a diagnosis in late May 2024. Like you, I was with her for the last week or her life and watched her suffer in those final days before finally passing away. I'm not sure if someone who hasn't experienced it can fully grasp how difficult it is to get through.

    As soon as my mom was diagnosed, I made sure to do what I...

    My mother died of cancer in June of this year after a diagnosis in late May 2024. Like you, I was with her for the last week or her life and watched her suffer in those final days before finally passing away. I'm not sure if someone who hasn't experienced it can fully grasp how difficult it is to get through.

    As soon as my mom was diagnosed, I made sure to do what I could to make her time left as good as it possibly could be. My brother and I visited her several times even though we live all the way across the country, and we were able to take her and her partner to Turks & Caicos (thanks to points and miles) for a family trip about three months before she died. She said it was the best thing anyone had ever done for her.

    I knew the statistics for my mom's cancer, and I knew that she wasn't going to go into remission. Even with everything I knew, that last year was full of fret and worry. The feelings just sat in the background and never went away. Now, even though I pre-grieved for almost 12 months, there are still days where I am just stricken. Having lost my younger sister fifteen years ago, I know that the grief will fade and change and be less present, but for now it hurts.

    My advice to you is to let the grief come and be open and honest about it with those closest to you. Don't hide from it.

    Thank you so much for posting about your experience with this. I think we sometimes lose track of the fact that people on the internet are real people who experience joy and tragedy just like everyone else does. It is refreshing to see honest writing about such a raw human experience.

  73. Carol Guest

    So sorry for your loss. Your mom sounds really wonderful. Wishing peace for you and your family.

  74. JFH Guest

    What a wonderful and honest tribute to your mother. Many thanks for sharing. F

  75. Chris Guest

    A beautiful tribute, and yes, totally appropriate for a human being. My condolences....

  76. Schar Diamond

    Sending you a big virtual hug, Ben. So sorry for your loss, I hope God is able to comfort you and your family & those who loved her. God bless.

  77. CZ Guest

    thanks for sharing this journey. She will watch you and your family from the heaven with smile.

  78. Mayank Arora Guest

    Made me tear up. Sending love.

  79. Jeff Guest

    So sorry for your loss Ben. Thank you for sharing her story and remembrances.

  80. Bill Guest

    Read every word and brought back memories of cancer taking my mother to her heavenly home in 1987. The memories still linger ... which is a good thing. Sounds like our moms had a lot in common in sharing with others and family.

  81. Jimmy Guest

    Aww Ben, I'm so sorry. And thank you for the reminder to go on trips with my mom while I can.
    I found a 2026 deal to Sapporo, Japan last week. As I was booking for my family of 4 I thought, "I should ask my mom if she wants to come." She's in her 70s, we have to wait for her a bit (though it wasn't that long ago that she sprinted through...

    Aww Ben, I'm so sorry. And thank you for the reminder to go on trips with my mom while I can.
    I found a 2026 deal to Sapporo, Japan last week. As I was booking for my family of 4 I thought, "I should ask my mom if she wants to come." She's in her 70s, we have to wait for her a bit (though it wasn't that long ago that she sprinted through the Guatemeala City airport with us), and she's a bit ornery sometimes.
    Regardless, she answered and said "Yes! Now I have something to live for!" She was being dramatic, but she really is that excited about going on the trip with us in 10 months.
    So thank you for helping me feel even better about that. I've always found your personal posts to be some of your best writing. Thanks for sharing yourself with all us strangers on the internet.

  82. Billiken Guest

    I'm very sorry for your loss, Ben. I too lost my Mom to cancer a few years ago. She too was a fighter, and miraculously survived her initial encounter. However, less than 2 years later, her blood work came back positive. She broke the bad news to me and apologized for putting ME through this. 3 days later, she suddenly passed away. While I was devastated by her loss, there also was a sense of...

    I'm very sorry for your loss, Ben. I too lost my Mom to cancer a few years ago. She too was a fighter, and miraculously survived her initial encounter. However, less than 2 years later, her blood work came back positive. She broke the bad news to me and apologized for putting ME through this. 3 days later, she suddenly passed away. While I was devastated by her loss, there also was a sense of relief. She was in a much better place and free. Also, I no longer had that ever-present sense of foreboding that lurked behind my every thought and emotion. Instead, I just had her memory. But, time does heal and I hope you may find peace.

  83. Blake Guest

    A beautiful ode to your dear mother. I am a longtime reader (20 years or so!) and this post got my quite choked up. I wish you and Ford and your two beautiful children peace.

  84. Allan Guest

    Ben, I am so sorry for your loss. You have helped me take a unforgettable trip with my mom for her round birthday to the Maldives a few years ago. It was so amazing seeing her reaction to flying business class for the first time. Thank you for sharing your wealth of knowledge and your kindness to others.

  85. Stingy Guest

    My deepest sympathy, Ben.

  86. NathanJ Diamond

    Ben, mein herzlich beleid. I’ve been reading for well over a dozen years now on a daily basis, and have particularly adored all the posts that involved either your Mum or Dad. You should be so very proud of the man, husband and father that she raised you to become. Not only that, but she raised you to become a leader to a gaggle of us travel nerds who hang on your every word, admire...

    Ben, mein herzlich beleid. I’ve been reading for well over a dozen years now on a daily basis, and have particularly adored all the posts that involved either your Mum or Dad. You should be so very proud of the man, husband and father that she raised you to become. Not only that, but she raised you to become a leader to a gaggle of us travel nerds who hang on your every word, admire your passion and dedication, and waste no time in coming aggressively to your defence when attacked (and will continue to do so). In this world and all that it has become, that is no small feat for a mother to have achieved. I know even though they separated many decades ago that this would still be very hard on your Papa - my condolences to him as well.

    Like you, I was raised Katholisch, however I no longer believe in a God, per se. I do believe that energy never dies though, and just changes form, so just remember - niemand geht hier werklich.

    #nooneseverreallygone

    X

    1. François Guest

      My condolences, Lucky.

  87. Adambrau New Member

    Hi Ben,

    I've never properly met you but I saw you rush on board on the upper deck of a UA747 FRA-IAD years ago. One of your buddies I chatted with a bit told me about you and while I wanted to introduce myself I fell asleep for most of the flight. Most importantly, I'm so sorry for the passing of your mother and send you much love. It seems like you had some amazing memories together. Stay strong.

    Adam

  88. Gautham Guest

    Thank you Ben for sharing your story with us. My heart felt condolences. I hope that you will have lot of cherished memories with your sons.

  89. Randy Guest

    Ben - I read something once that's always stuck with me. Hope it means something to you.

    "God gave us memories so that we might have roses in January. May you always have memories!!"

  90. _ar Guest

    You are too young to have to go through the loss of a parent. My heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

  91. trust778 Guest

    If you can look back on the last six years and be at peace and find joy knowing that it was the best six years with your mom, well then you owe no apology at all to your loyal fans. You made the right decision and the best of the situation. My heartfelt condolences to you and your family. May the Almighty lift you up and give you strength to get through this season and...

    If you can look back on the last six years and be at peace and find joy knowing that it was the best six years with your mom, well then you owe no apology at all to your loyal fans. You made the right decision and the best of the situation. My heartfelt condolences to you and your family. May the Almighty lift you up and give you strength to get through this season and may the wonderful memories you have with your mom fill you with hope in the days, months, and years ahead. God Bless.

  92. Jordan Guest

    Ben - I have been a daily reader for well over a decade now, and have probably read 98% of articles you’ve written during that time. Thank you for bringing that joy, entertainment and knowledge to us, even throughout this tragic and heartbreaking time. I can only imagine how difficult it has been to balance your work and family. I am truly sorry for your loss, and though I never met her, reading this article...

    Ben - I have been a daily reader for well over a decade now, and have probably read 98% of articles you’ve written during that time. Thank you for bringing that joy, entertainment and knowledge to us, even throughout this tragic and heartbreaking time. I can only imagine how difficult it has been to balance your work and family. I am truly sorry for your loss, and though I never met her, reading this article conveyed the wonderful woman your mother was.

    My thoughts are with you and your family.

  93. jm Guest

    Since first meeting you at an SFO UA plane “pull” many years ago, I have been struck by your selfless and empathic voice — and it’s affirming to see how you’ve matured into a successful industry observer. But none of that matters more than family, as we all come to realize. I’m glad you were able to share your feelings and experiences with your other family…here on OMAAT.

  94. Roamingredcoat Diamond

    Condolences

  95. Alex Guest

    Hi Ben, I've been reading this blog every single day since the economist referred to it....maybe 12 years ago? I don't know but I just want to send a BIG BIG BIG hug to you and your family for the loss.
    My sincere condolences for your loss.

  96. Pier Smulders Guest

    My heartfelt condolences to you and your family Ben. Thank you for sharing this very moving tribute to your mum. May she rest in peace.

  97. Stuart F Guest

    Dear Ben,
    Please accept my sincere condolences on the death of your beloved mother. Thinking of you and your family at this difficult time. Sincerely, Stuart

  98. Dina New Member

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings about your mother. It was a very moving tribute and really captured her spirit and love. Treasure the great memories you have. Although you said you've had time to prepare grief is its own thing. Its ok to grieve in whatever way seems best for you and your family.

  99. Liz Guest

    As a cancer survivor -at least for now- who also lost my father and older sister to cancer much too soon I know what you are going through and can only say that the pain lessens with time, but it will never go away.

    It was incredibly generous of you to write the beautiful and very moving tribute to your mom at this very difficult time for you and your family, but it also shows...

    As a cancer survivor -at least for now- who also lost my father and older sister to cancer much too soon I know what you are going through and can only say that the pain lessens with time, but it will never go away.

    It was incredibly generous of you to write the beautiful and very moving tribute to your mom at this very difficult time for you and your family, but it also shows what kind of son your mother raised.

    Wherever she is now she's looking at you and smiling with pride.

  100. Marina Guest

    No words can ease the pain of losing one's mother, so I'm just sending you all the love and strength.

  101. Reed Guest

    Ben, I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad you got in as many trips and experiences as you were able to with her. Thinking about you and the whole family.

  102. Blaine Guest

    Been reading the blog since the beginning - sending lots of love to you, Ford, and everyone else who loved your mom.

  103. KSD Guest

    From your trip reviews and pics, and now this post, your mother always comes across as such a well-loved, and lovely person. God bless you and your family. Sorry for your loss, Ben.

  104. KEHFG Guest

    Sorry to hear for your loss. RIP & may peace be with you.
    What an amazing tribute to your mom & it's never come to me that I would be able to write such an extraordinary beautiful eulogy--your mom would be super proud of you.
    Take some break from writing whenever needed, we will have patience.
    It is Well, it is Well, with my Soul

  105. Jeffrey Guest

    Ben, my heartfelt condoleances to you and your family.
    I hope it will get better over time for you, like what I have been experiencing after my dear mom passed last year

  106. MA Nguyen Guest

    Sorry for your loss, and thank you for the courage to share your stories. Your mother sounds like she was a wonderful person. I'm glad that Jet and Miles got a chance to meet and spent time together with her.

  107. Eric Guest

    So sorry for your loss, all my support during this difficult time. Thank you for sharing. Hope time will help. All the best for you and your family.

  108. Koen Guest

    Ben, i’ve been reading your blog for years and years and have always enjoyed the little posts and updates on your family almost as much as a first class flight report. My travel is usually booked through Ford’s agency and I look at travel and perhaps even life a little different thanks to you. My deepest condolences on your loss and I wish you and your family strength and very happy memories.

  109. omaatCommenter New Member

    So sorry for your loss.
    She raised a great son. I never question your motivations when reading your blog which is the highest compliment I can give on the internet. Trustworthy, well-meaning and just trying to help people.

  110. Angel MIA New Member

    Ben, I’m so sorry for your profound loss. Reading your post brought back memories of losing my mother over 10 years ago. It still hurts, and I think of her nearly every day. There’s something unique about losing a mother. Please remember that there’s no right or wrong way to grieve. Keep feeling the grief; eventually, you’ll feel okay and be able to move forward. Sadness may never fully go away, and that’s okay.
    ...

    Ben, I’m so sorry for your profound loss. Reading your post brought back memories of losing my mother over 10 years ago. It still hurts, and I think of her nearly every day. There’s something unique about losing a mother. Please remember that there’s no right or wrong way to grieve. Keep feeling the grief; eventually, you’ll feel okay and be able to move forward. Sadness may never fully go away, and that’s okay.
    As your reader, I'm unable to offer you any advice. However, you are young and have so much ahead of you, so please take the time to enjoy each day of your life. With this loss, you realize what truly matters to you, so try to live each day to the fullest, with your priorities in mind.
    There's no need to apologize for not serving our readers better. We all face struggles at different times, and some things must come first. I, for one, won't try to do too much too soon when your heart feels fragile. You need to rest both physically and mentally before deciding what you might want to do next. Please prioritize taking care of yourself first. I look forward to your next adventures when you're ready.

  111. Nic Guest

    As an aviation passionate, I’ve been reading this blog every single day for years now. I love it for the complete and detailed coverage, for the polite and respectful views but most of all for the human touch that you Ben are able to put in your stories and reports. Thanks for sharing your feelings, all these comments are a tangible sign of how many people around the world share your grief.

  112. Ian Guest

    So sorry for your loss. Never an easy time. Sending positive vibes to you and your family

  113. Russ Gold

    Hey Ben - please do not ever apologize again for sharing such great words with your readers nor doing anything that helps you in your process of grief.

    I have always loved hearing the stories of travel with your Mother and how special you have made all of these trips with her over the past six years. You surely helped your mother make the most of the last six years and I hope that...

    Hey Ben - please do not ever apologize again for sharing such great words with your readers nor doing anything that helps you in your process of grief.

    I have always loved hearing the stories of travel with your Mother and how special you have made all of these trips with her over the past six years. You surely helped your mother make the most of the last six years and I hope that you are proud of that. Your whole family is surely enriched by the memories you all have created, and I hope nothing more for you all than to find solace in them at this time.

    Thank you for letting your loyal readers be a part of your extended family and all the best wishes to you all.

  114. Eronn Guest

    Beautifully written. So sorry for your loss. God bless you and your family.

  115. HarveyFloorbanger Guest

    Sorry, Cousin.

  116. Stefan Guest

    Ben, mein herzliches Beileid. Möge deine Mutter in Frieden ruhen

  117. MileageHunter New Member

    Ben, I've been reading your blog since 2006. I've had some amazing travel experiences thanks to you and this blog. I'm so sorry for your loss - and thank you for sharing this.

  118. Indopithecus Guest

    Ben, I have been following your blog for years but this is your first post that I can say that I can personally relate to. I lost my Mum to cancer, too, this time breast cancer. That was 25 years ago; the pain of the loss is less acute now but it never goes away. She, too, doted on children, hers and those of others. My Dad had passed away 10 years earlier but I...

    Ben, I have been following your blog for years but this is your first post that I can say that I can personally relate to. I lost my Mum to cancer, too, this time breast cancer. That was 25 years ago; the pain of the loss is less acute now but it never goes away. She, too, doted on children, hers and those of others. My Dad had passed away 10 years earlier but I was not as close to him as I was to her and I am not as emotionally scarred by that event (although it was painful, especially because I was not there with him when he died). Loved ones, though, never die because they are always in our hearts. And if you treated your loved ones well while they were alive, you will not feel any guilt.

    There used to be a time when I used to 'speak' to my Mum in my mind recalling fun times or circumstances we had shared. I do this much less now but even today I have the occasional laugh based on those old memories. And I am happy for you that you wrote about your experience. It is definitely cathartic. But the emotional pain of personal loss is shared by millions around the world. Look at what's happening in Gaza, in Sudan, in Israel, in the Congo; madness. If those who lead these campaigns experience personal loss, they might think twice before they give these barbaric orders.

  119. Jakub Guest

    Been here more than a decade and your stories and articles are great proof of how greatly you were raised by your Mom. Lost my dad 2 years ago, and although extremely painful, at least gets better over time. Thoughts and prayers for your Mom in better place, you and your family. All the best from Poland.

  120. Seattle Todd Guest

    Ben, I've been a longtime reader and your genuine and deep love for your Mom is absolutely beautiful. Frankly I don't know what I'll do when that time comes. Your post is an equally beautiful tribute to her and all that she means to you and your family. My heartfelt thoughts are with you all.

  121. Mike C Guest

    You do deserve these comments and many more because you were a wonderful son to your Mom -- probably the best a Mom could ever have. I am sorry to read your post and I can only imagine the heartbreak you are feeling right now. As you described, it's a horrific sense of loss and grief for those of us left behind. But your Mom is home now, free of physical pain and surrounded by...

    You do deserve these comments and many more because you were a wonderful son to your Mom -- probably the best a Mom could ever have. I am sorry to read your post and I can only imagine the heartbreak you are feeling right now. As you described, it's a horrific sense of loss and grief for those of us left behind. But your Mom is home now, free of physical pain and surrounded by peace, love and joy. She is still with you in spirit and you can and should chat with her whenever you like.

  122. S Diamond

    I am so sorry for your loss Ben. I am glad you got to spend so much time with your mom in her final years. Wishing you and your entire family the absolute best in a difficult time.

  123. Mlp New Member

    Ben, I am so sorry for your loss. Your mom sounds like a remarkable woman. I hope that your memories give you comfort. I am so glad she got to meet your sons.

  124. Arun Guest

    What a heartfelt tribute to your mother and how much she meant to you. My condolences to you and your family. Losing a loved one is never easy, but as you note, having the opportunity to say a long goodbye offers some closure, even though it’s difficult at first.

    I discovered your site because of my love for travel. You have taught me not only how to travel "better" but also how to cherish those...

    What a heartfelt tribute to your mother and how much she meant to you. My condolences to you and your family. Losing a loved one is never easy, but as you note, having the opportunity to say a long goodbye offers some closure, even though it’s difficult at first.

    I discovered your site because of my love for travel. You have taught me not only how to travel "better" but also how to cherish those travel experiences. While it may just be a travel blog, adding your personal stories of joy and loss makes it so much more. I look forward to checking your site daily. Please know that through this channel, you bring joy to all your readers. My love to you and your family.

  125. Jason E Guest

    Please accept my sincere condolences as I lost my mother to ovarian cancer when I was 13, and she was 44. The pain eases over time, but never goes away. Thankfully, she is not suffering anymore, but I get how it feels. Always remember to take time for yourself whenever you need to, and NEVER bottle up how you are feeling.

  126. Adrian Guest

    One more thing:
    Please let us know if you want to set up a donation page to your mom's favorite charity or a donation page to a reputable cancer research foundation!
    I am sure many of us will want to make a small donation to remember her!

  127. Adrian Guest

    Just want to send you and your family my most sincere condolences!

    Take a break from this blog and you will need time to process the loss! Yes she is in a better place now!

    Just remember that you need to live your life to the fullest now.

  128. bill Guest

    So sorry for your loss.

  129. Josh Guest

    Long time reader. May her memory be a blessing

  130. TheNoisyAmerican New Member

    I’m so sorry for your loss. This was a phenomenal memorial to your mom and is a testament to how great a person you are. She’ll continue to live through your memories, especially as you share them with your own kids as they grow up. I hope you can find some peace in that.

  131. TheNoisyAmerican New Member

    I’m so sorry for your loss. This was a phenomenal memorial to your mom and is a testament to how great a person you are. She’ll continue to live through your memories, especially as you share them with your own kids as they grow up. I hope you can find some peace in that.

  132. Andrew Deutsch Guest

    Beautiful and loving post. Please stay strong. I extend my most sincere condolences. Find comfort in those you love and the many wonderful memories of your beloved mother.

  133. Garrett Guest

    Just wanted to add to the comment count to show you how much I appreciate you! Your mom sounds like an angel returning home.

  134. Jurrie Guest

    Such a beautiful tribute. I'll be lighting a candle for your mom tonight.

  135. Paul Hines Guest

    I am very sorry for your loss. I lost my mother to breast cancer when I was 15. It was devastating watching her suffer for 4 years as a teenager. My thoughts are with you and your family. Find some peace. Paul

  136. David S Guest

    Ben, I’m so sorry for your loss and you don’t need to apologize for anything or
    to anyone. If someone can’t empathize with what you’re going through - they shouldn’t be in your life. I went through something similar with my mom and, frankly, situations like this reveal your true friends. I don’t mean that in a harsh way - but you can tell who genuinely care and those who are simply going through...

    Ben, I’m so sorry for your loss and you don’t need to apologize for anything or
    to anyone. If someone can’t empathize with what you’re going through - they shouldn’t be in your life. I went through something similar with my mom and, frankly, situations like this reveal your true friends. I don’t mean that in a harsh way - but you can tell who genuinely care and those who are simply going through the motions. It’s sometimes completely unexpected and you’ll form new bonds with people you might not have expected.

    My one piece of advice - in a month or so - take a trip with Ford, or a close friend - to somewhere you can just be totally at ease and relax. For me, that was Puerto Vallarta with my bestie. After so much stress, it was so wonderful to go somewhere, with someone, where I could just exhale. Have some drinks, sit by the beach/pool, and party (for me that was just 30 mins of silly dancing at a club).

  137. RichM Diamond

    My sincere condolences on your loss, Ben

    And if I may offer some unsolicited advice, then, in line with your plea for more kindness, please be kind to yourself. You mention that you feel you failed and let down people in recent years. While I can't presume to know whether this is true, I can say from experience that the reality is that being a husband, father, and breadwinner, while caring for a terminally ill...

    My sincere condolences on your loss, Ben

    And if I may offer some unsolicited advice, then, in line with your plea for more kindness, please be kind to yourself. You mention that you feel you failed and let down people in recent years. While I can't presume to know whether this is true, I can say from experience that the reality is that being a husband, father, and breadwinner, while caring for a terminally ill parent would leave anyone overstretched and potentially overwhelmed. I'm sure that those who love you will value what you did, rather than fixating on what you couldn't.

  138. Tom Guest

    Thank you for sharing your story, Ben. Remembering your mom’s diagnosis, it has been great to see your mentions of her dotted throughout your posts the last years, as you got to spend so much time together. My condolences to you and your family.

  139. Father Guest

    May she rest in God's peace. Condolences and prayers for healing, grace, and strength.

  140. Olivia Guest

    Frequent reader, first time commenter. I’m so sorry for your loss, Ben- there’s nothing selfish about sharing this; in fact, it’s incredibly generous of you to share your personal life with such a beautiful recollection of your mothers life. May her memory be a blessing.

  141. ChuckG New Member

    Lost my Mom two and a half years ago. My sincere condolences.

  142. Jim Guest

    Long time reader but first time commenter - a beautiful tribute to your mother that so aptly captures the shock and devastation that occurs in spite of the inevitability of her passing. Wishing you and your family strength at this time, with my sincere condolences.

  143. Kevin Guest

    so sorry for your loss Ben. Sending you lots of love.

  144. MissingScurrah Gold

    I am so sorry Ben. The prospect of loss is always terrifying, and the passing is always worse than we imagine. While I don't know you, I am thinking of you, Ford, Miles and Jet in this very difficult time.

    You seem to have had such a wonderful time with your mother over the past few years, and the efforts you made to ensure no moment was wasted are as much a tribute to her...

    I am so sorry Ben. The prospect of loss is always terrifying, and the passing is always worse than we imagine. While I don't know you, I am thinking of you, Ford, Miles and Jet in this very difficult time.

    You seem to have had such a wonderful time with your mother over the past few years, and the efforts you made to ensure no moment was wasted are as much a tribute to her as the sentiments you've expressed in your post.

    It must have been so difficult for her to say goodbye to a son who clearly loved her so very much, and for you to lose someone who clearly meant the world to you.

    Please try as best you are able to look after yourself. Nothing about the next little while will be easy, but in time things will get better - not because we miss our loved ones any less, but because their memory helps renew our purposes.

    I'm sure your mother was exceptionally proud of the things you have achieved, and will be proud to celebrate all that still lies ahead when you are one day reunited with her and your brother.

    In the meantime, please try to get some rest and allow yourself to feel what you are feeling. Take each day one at a time, and slowly but surely you will find the feelings of pain begin to make way to contentment.

    Life can make our hearts empty, but in time they will be full again.

  145. kimshep Guest

    Ben .. I, like everyone else on this board, feel and share your pain.

    "Life" is not always a bed of roses,
    "Life" is sometimes there to teach us lessons
    "Life" can sometimes resemble a bag of ordinary smelly fertilizer
    You can never predict what "Life" is about to dole out to you
    It may be great, it may be nothing or it may be catastrophic.
    "Life" is always an...

    Ben .. I, like everyone else on this board, feel and share your pain.

    "Life" is not always a bed of roses,
    "Life" is sometimes there to teach us lessons
    "Life" can sometimes resemble a bag of ordinary smelly fertilizer
    You can never predict what "Life" is about to dole out to you
    It may be great, it may be nothing or it may be catastrophic.
    "Life" is always an experience and finally,
    "Life" is always variable. That is what makes it so compelling.

    Your life is changing - just like everyone else's. Do what you've always done. Embrace and respect those changes and you'll be fine.

    Hint: Think of a special moment with your Mom that had you both burst into hysterical laughter - and save that sealed in your memory. You'll always have ammunition to draw on if "Life" gets it wrong. And you'll always have your own personal reminder of your treasured Mom.

  146. Joe Guest

    Thank you for sharing this, Ben, and I’m sorry for your loss. It sounds like you did an outstanding job supporting your Mom while trying to juggle your other obligations.

    My Mom died of cancer earlier this year, but only around 4 weeks after her diagnosis. I spent that entire time with her and your article brought back a lot of feelings. It’s very difficult to watch a loved one go through the process.

  147. quorumcall Diamond

    Sorry for your loss, Ben. May she rest in peace.

  148. Josh M Guest

    Longtime reader and have never commented. Just wanted to wish you and your family all of the best. Sounds like your mother led an admirable life. May she rest in peace

    1. Scott G Guest

      Ben,

      As someone who is not religious, I struggle with the idea of legacy and how the world moves on when we are gone. The most we can do while we are here is try to live a life filled with enjoyment and respect while spending time with friends and family. From your words, it sounds like your mother got everything she wanted from this life. From raising wonderful children, to traveling and spending time...

      Ben,

      As someone who is not religious, I struggle with the idea of legacy and how the world moves on when we are gone. The most we can do while we are here is try to live a life filled with enjoyment and respect while spending time with friends and family. From your words, it sounds like your mother got everything she wanted from this life. From raising wonderful children, to traveling and spending time with friends and family. Im certain she was proud of your accomplishments and the family she leaves behind. She sounds like a fantastic woman. May her memories comfort you during this time. It seems she left this world knowing she had made a mark on those she left behind. That’s all we can ask for.

    2. Scott G Guest

      (Didn’t mean to reply to this comment, oops)

  149. Ryan Martin Guest

    All the love and my most sincere condolences, good sir.

  150. Kelvin Guest

    Thanks for sharing and sorry for your loss. I can relate as I lost my Mum in July, after an 18 month battle. I think about her every day.

    Your post is incredibly thoughtful and while the coming days/weeks/months will be emotional, you can always take solace in the knowledge your mother always wants the best for you and wants you to stay strong.

    It’s incredibly difficult to watch someone go through that -...

    Thanks for sharing and sorry for your loss. I can relate as I lost my Mum in July, after an 18 month battle. I think about her every day.

    Your post is incredibly thoughtful and while the coming days/weeks/months will be emotional, you can always take solace in the knowledge your mother always wants the best for you and wants you to stay strong.

    It’s incredibly difficult to watch someone go through that - but I guess it helps to put perspective on what is really important in life - friends and family.

  151. David Guest

    Ben you deserve every kind word coming your way because you are a kind and caring human being and as the saying goes an acorn doesn't fall far from the tree.
    God bless to your dearly departed mother taken too soon but sure to be looking down on you and your family with immense pride as you continue your journey enhancing your families legacy

  152. MSNTRIATHLETE New Member

    Thank you for your selfless tribute to your mother. It takes a lot of bravery to write openly about something so deep, personal, and touching. Hopefully, the act of doing so helps with your healing and reflection. Your wonderful words are also helping me through a challenging time with my dad’s healthcare. OMAAT, and your writing, have always been a peaceful place for me and many others, in addition to the highly educational travel content....

    Thank you for your selfless tribute to your mother. It takes a lot of bravery to write openly about something so deep, personal, and touching. Hopefully, the act of doing so helps with your healing and reflection. Your wonderful words are also helping me through a challenging time with my dad’s healthcare. OMAAT, and your writing, have always been a peaceful place for me and many others, in addition to the highly educational travel content. Please know that your words help and heal. May you and your family heal as well.

  153. Toby Guest

    Been reading your blog for years and also lost my mom to cancer. I was touched by your willingness to share! Wish you and your family all the best! She will always be with you and you will enjoy and rise! ❤️❤️

  154. Liam A Guest

    Ben, so sorry to you and your family for your loss. A privilege to read this beautiful tribute. Our thoughts are with you.

  155. Anne Roberts Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss. I know from experience this is very, horribly painful. I lost my 36 year old son to brain cancer 7 months ago. I don't know when I will feel whole again. You sound like a loving and dedicated person and I wish you all the best. I'm sure your mom knew how much you loved her.

  156. Dale Guest

    Ben, you have written a very touching tribute to your wonderful mother. So sorry for your loss.

  157. Jim Guest

    I read every day, I never comment, but today I will to extend my deepest condolences of course, but also to mention how much respect I have for the way you handled the past six years, all the way up to this incredibly mature and heartbreaking post.
    Strength and honor dear Ben, may the outpouring of support you get here be of some, however small, help.

  158. James Guest

    I am very saddened by the loss of your beloved mother. She seemed to be a joy of a person. I lost my father in 2017 and the sadness lingers but I cherish the memories I have of him.

  159. Tocqueville Guest

    My condolences Ben. You are a great steward of her legacy.

  160. Warren Guest

    So sorry for your loss.

  161. Julian Sanchez Guest

    I'm a big fan of yours. Sincerest condolences.

  162. Hiro Diamond

    I’m so sorry to hear your loss. Sending a big hug to you, Ben.

  163. Mike Guest

    I know exactly your pain.

    My heart goes out to you.

  164. Nolan Guest

    I’m so sorry for your loss. Your mother sounded wonderful; this is a wonderful tribute to her.

    I’m sure your emotions are complicated and conflicting, and that’s okay. Thank you for sharing so much of your life. I’m reminded and encouraged to reach out to a friend whose mother passed the same way some years ago. I hope these that in these next few weeks, you find the strength to honor and acknowledge your emotions....

    I’m so sorry for your loss. Your mother sounded wonderful; this is a wonderful tribute to her.

    I’m sure your emotions are complicated and conflicting, and that’s okay. Thank you for sharing so much of your life. I’m reminded and encouraged to reach out to a friend whose mother passed the same way some years ago. I hope these that in these next few weeks, you find the strength to honor and acknowledge your emotions.

    I keep coming back to this blog partly because it reminds me of the old internet. I would call my friends on the land line to hop on AOL messenger on dial-up; it was fun and I didn’t lose track of the line between their digital life and real life. I feel like I still see your life and personality, it isn’t lost in the content, it’s still there. Heck, Ford has helped me book things before; That’s awesome! Thank you for all you do. It been neat to keep track with you for some time here. Thanks

  165. Tom Guest

    Ben,

    My mom is 100, and I can’t tell you how many times my wife and I have taken that “last” trip with her. I treasure them all.

    We’re taking a cruise this Christmas, and I’ll be grateful for every second we get to share in that no-worries environment.

    I’m in my sixties, and I am afraid of what life will be like without her.

    Thank goodness for the love. That you got —...

    Ben,

    My mom is 100, and I can’t tell you how many times my wife and I have taken that “last” trip with her. I treasure them all.

    We’re taking a cruise this Christmas, and I’ll be grateful for every second we get to share in that no-worries environment.

    I’m in my sixties, and I am afraid of what life will be like without her.

    Thank goodness for the love. That you got — and continue to get — to share and feel that with and for your mom is the greatest gift I can imagine. I mean, how the heck did that happen, that that’s part of life?!? What a miracle we’ve been given.

    The pain of losing your mom will be profound, but it’s only because you have the capacity for love. Thank goodness the love lives on.

    Wishing you gentle healing, my friend.

  166. theconfidencemagazine99 New Member

    Sorry for your loss Ben and Thanks for having the courage to share the thinkings.

  167. simmonad Guest

    May you live to be 120.

  168. GM Pavlos Guest

    Sorry for your loss Ben.

  169. Christoph Guest

    Please accept my heartfelt condolences. Having lost a parent to cancer myself, I understand the pain and the void it leaves behind. It's a journey no one should have to walk, but please know you're not alone. Her strength and warmth will always be remembered. Wishing you peace and comfort in the days ahead.

    1. CSD Guest

      Your mother sounds like an amazing person - I am not surprised, given the fundamental decency you display on this blog. You are a true testament to her and that will continue.

      May memories of her bring you comfort.

  170. letsgofire New Member

    This is an extraordinary article. Thank you for sharing how you are processing this unhappy and challenging part of our human experience. Any parent would be proud of what you have done.

  171. ellie Guest

    Thank you for sharing such a deeply personal and heartfelt tribute. Your love and dedication to your mom through her battle is truly inspiring. It’s a powerful reminder to cherish every moment we have with our loved ones and to find gratitude even in the hardest times. Wishing you strength and peace as you navigate this profound loss

  172. RoadTrip Guest

    We are so sorry for you loss. You Mother was a beautiful, bright light in this world.

  173. KXKIRI Diamond

    An absolutely beautiful tribute, Ben.

  174. Alex Guest

    My condolences to you and your family, Ben.

  175. Steven E Guest

    Terrible news - I wish she rests in peace - so sorry for your loss to you and the family

  176. Paula Matos Guest

    I am so, so sorry about the loss of your dear mother. Thank you for the reminder that we must tell our loved ones how much we care, for at some point we can no longer do that.

  177. Josh Guest

    Very sorry to hear about your loss. It's wonderful that you are able to reflect on the good memories. She sounds like she was an amazing woman who truly wanted to give more than she took in life.

  178. OutboundLAX Guest

    Thank you for sharing. You made me feel something special through the tears. After 14 years of daily reading, you feel like a friend.

  179. DragonBaby New Member

    I am really sorry to hear this news Ben. I have read many of the trip reports that you wrote traveling with your mum. May those wonderful memories stay with you always.

  180. Jordan Diamond

    That was lovely to read, so thank you for sharing. Losing one's mother is the hardest pain. My thoughts are with you and your family.

    From my own experience, you will feel her, your kids will see her for sure (their reactions), and she will watch over you all.

  181. DesertGhost Guest

    May your mom's memory always be a blessing.

  182. John Guest

    Condolences to you, Ford, and your children.

  183. Joe Guest

    I knew what this post was. I didn't know if I could read this post. I skipped straight to the comments to tell you how much my heart goes out to you. And then I read your words. This is a beautiful post, and shows so much about you, your relationship with your family, the life you've built and the person you are. You'll undoubtedly have hundreds of comments here. But I want to share...

    I knew what this post was. I didn't know if I could read this post. I skipped straight to the comments to tell you how much my heart goes out to you. And then I read your words. This is a beautiful post, and shows so much about you, your relationship with your family, the life you've built and the person you are. You'll undoubtedly have hundreds of comments here. But I want to share and say I'm in tears for you, for myself, and for what is an oh-so human experience. You are a great son and I can't imagine how proud your mom is of you and the world you've built around you. We're here with you now in these moments. It's the true humanity and care of the millions of people this blog has truly touched.

  184. Andrew Guest

    God bless your lovely mom, and your family. She was clearly a superwoman, and was also clearly so proud of you and the family you have made. Rest in peace, and hopefully she is having a great time with your older brother

    After reading here for 4-5 years, pretty much daily, my first ever comment. Thanks also for all the enjoyment your bring ppl here too

  185. Eve Guest

    Sorry for your loss. I am happy you remember her for all the brilliant moments she has given you and that is what is important, that she got to live a life where she got to experience incredible experiences and have a brilliant son like you. I am certain she left this world with happiness and contend.

  186. Throwawayname Guest

    Sorry for your loss, Ben.

  187. I love your passion! Guest

    Very sad to hear that!

  188. Luis Fernandez Guest

    I’ve been reading your blog for a few years now so thank you very much for that. I feel like I know you a little bit as you write in a very personal style which is refreshing and welcoming. I’m very sorry for your loss and send you my sincerest condolences from here in London

  189. Scott Guest

    So so sorry for your loss Lucky. She would have been proud to have a son like you. Love from the UK.

  190. JT Guest

    Reading this post for over a decade and don't post much. But, thank you for sharing such a beautiful tribute.

  191. Rob Guest

    My deepest condolences and prayers for your massive loss thank you for sharing your insights and inspiration.

  192. DBB Guest

    What a wonderful tribute, Ben. It is clear you loved her and she loved you and that's really all most people ever want. May she rest in peace.

  193. Charles Guest

    Thank you for opening up so candidly about your Mom, looks like a a great lady with a heart of gold. Glad to see you helped her travel so well and memorably.

  194. JetBlueFanboy Diamond

    Beautiful post, Ben. I'm sorry for your loss, and I'm glad that you got to make the best of your mom's time on earth with you, something I often struggle with. You're an exceptional son, and I'm sure she's proud of you. Praying for you and your family.

  195. Gildo Vargas Guest

    A garden of beautiful and scented flowers to you, mamá; leaving this complex organic life behind and approaching the supreme energy with your beautiful and brave soul. Blessings to you and your beloved family, may you staying with them in this transcendental life.
    Abrazos, Ben y familia

  196. Timo Diamond

    Such a lovely tribute. May she rest in peace. I am envious you got to share your love of travel with her as that's something I didn't get with my mother. RIP

  197. Florian Peters Guest

    Hello Ben, We don't know each other, but I can understand your thoughts very well. Especially this dialogue between grief and, at the same time, the joy that she no longer has to suffer. My mother fought almost the same long battle as yours. I am very happy for your family that your mother was able to meet her grandchildren. My sincere condolences and warm regards from Germany, Florian

  198. David Aird Guest

    What a wonderful mum and so lucky to have such a wonderful son. I’m glad you had such special times together as your mum said it sounds like those last 6 years were her best in so many ways. Take care of yourself David.

  199. Brian G. Diamond

    I remember during one of your pandemic live streams I asked your mother a question about a cruise that she had just taken recently. She gave me such a detailed answer, and really wanted to make sure my question was answered. From that single interaction I could tell she was so nice.

    Lucky sorry for your loss!

  200. Skdxb Gold

    My heartfelt condolences Ben (:

  201. Lepe Guest

    Being an only son, I know very well what the loss of a mother means. I felt unprotected when I lost my mother, even though I had become a grandfather myself.
    My sincere condolences to you

  202. Steve Guest

    Sincere condolences Ben. I recall reading several great trip reports that you shared with your mom over the years.

  203. Matthew Mak Guest

    My deepest condolences from Singapore Ben. Thanks for your post. Remind us to treasure what we have now and especially our parents who are still with us.

  204. Julie Gowan Guest

    Beautifully written. Your mom has a wonderful, caring son. May you and your family find peace soon knowing she is in a better place. ❤️

  205. ecco Diamond

    So saddened to hear this news Ben. Mums are special and it hurts losing them. It’s a primal thing I think as they gave life to you.
    She’s with the angels now.
    I found it therapeutic to deal with my grief when I lost my Mum to make a photobook about her life. It made me reflect on what a great life she had even though the final years were pretty tough due...

    So saddened to hear this news Ben. Mums are special and it hurts losing them. It’s a primal thing I think as they gave life to you.
    She’s with the angels now.
    I found it therapeutic to deal with my grief when I lost my Mum to make a photobook about her life. It made me reflect on what a great life she had even though the final years were pretty tough due to illness. It took me at least a couple of years to get over her going. Take things easy for a while. It’s huge losing your mum. Hugs.

  206. Greg Guest

    We are so sorry for the loss of your Mom. So glad that you were able to make such good memories with her. Thinking of you and your family ❤️

  207. Tim Dumdum Guest

    Sincerest condolences for you and your family on your Mum's passing

  208. Vickie Mayne Guest

    Hugs. Ben- it’s clear your mom was a special person and just know I am praying for you all.

  209. Unknown Poster Guest

    from a follower since 2008, mein Beileid.

  210. glenn t Diamond

    My sincere condolences to you and your family at this sad time.
    I have followed for some years your travels with your mother (and dad) and always thought how generous and thoughtful you were.
    Your words here bear testament to that. You have much to be proud of.

  211. Mnscout Guest

    Beautiful tribute Ben. You’re grieving now, but I hope you know it was you, your kids, and your dedication to your mom that contributed hugely to her quality of life during these years. My deepest condolences!

  212. Justin Guest

    Sorry for your loss Benjamin. I always bought my mom’s AA employee badge with me whenever I traveled for a couple of years after she passed. It was nice know she was with me when I was drinking instant coffee in the middle of the night at a hotel.

  213. LeighTristar Guest

    My heart goes out to you and your loved ones. Thank you for sharing part of your life with us and for reminding us of what’s most important.

  214. 9volt Diamond

    Ben, I’ve been a follower of yours since your Seattle days. Thank you for always sharing your life with us. My deepest condolences for your loss.

  215. sullyofdoha Guest

    Ben,
    I've been a part of your OMAT community for more than a decade. You have always given so much of yourself to us which suggests you were also able to give back in spades to your mother.
    It's heartbreaking to read of your mother's passing and the inevitable anguish you are going through.
    Deepest sympathies to you and your family.
    Respectfully,
    Scott

  216. Michael Guest

    Having lost my wife of 20 years to cancer just a few short weeks ago, I know exactly what you are going through. You’re a terrific son and caregiver and your Mom is finally at peace. My thoughts are with you and your entire family. Thanks for sharing and for your compassion and vulnerability, Ben.

  217. Wkc Guest

    My deepest condolences, your Mom was lucky to have a son like you.

  218. OldCrowAZ New Member

    Ben,

    What a great tribute to your Mom. Sincere condolences to you and your entire family.

  219. Hank Guest

    Dear Ben,
    Sincere condolences to you, Ford and your family. May your mother’s memory be a blessing.

  220. Gene Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss, Ben. You are lucky to have had such a great relationship with your mom.

  221. Andy Guest

    Ben, I have been reading your blog for a while now and have learned so much about the world of award travel. But, thank you for this meaningful tribute, it definitely brought tears to my eyes. Sometimes with life it is easy to lose track of the precious moments. Please take the time to care for yourself. Wishing you all the best.

  222. Aviation_Fan Member

    Condolences on your loss Ben.

  223. JK Guest

    So sorry for your loss Ben, I remember your mom on a livestream during covid, she seemed like an absolute darling. Thank you for sharing all that you have, so many of us can unfortunately relate and there really is some comfort in shared/similar experiences. Big hugs!

  224. Andy Guest

    Sorry for your loss, Ben. She was surely so so proud of you and the impact you’ve had on so many people.

  225. Sanjay Guest

    I’m so incredibly sorry. I feel your pain and loss in the words you’ve written. I have followed you for many years and the many stories you have shared about your wonderful mom - thank you for that. Cherish all of that love. It will help heal you.

  226. Josh Guest

    So sorry for your loss. Thanks for the very moving post.

  227. Oliver Guest

    My condolences Ben, terribly sorry to hear of your loss.

  228. modok Guest

    Lucky, I offer you my condolences to this situation. While I am still very young compared to the vast majority of viewers, I have also been in this situation multiple times before and I completely understand. You definitely are right about one thing though - spend time with your family whenever you can. And take those trips whenever you can. In that regard, I would like to thank you for your blog, as they have...

    Lucky, I offer you my condolences to this situation. While I am still very young compared to the vast majority of viewers, I have also been in this situation multiple times before and I completely understand. You definitely are right about one thing though - spend time with your family whenever you can. And take those trips whenever you can. In that regard, I would like to thank you for your blog, as they have opened my eyes to the outside world. Places that I have previously have never heard before are now on my bucket list due to your trips.

  229. Pauls98 Gold

    Having already lost both my parents, there really aren’t any words to make the pain for you and your family any better. I will offer you my genuine and deepest condolences along with my sincere wishes for strength, peace and comfort for you and all who loved your Mom.

  230. Rebecca Guest

    I lost my husband a year ago today. I enjoy you blog more than any others available that are similar. Best wishes and much love. Hope your pain recedes to give you only the wonderful memories you mentioned.

  231. Al Guest

    Hi Lucky, sorry for your loss and deep condolences. TRUELY appreciate the quality posts and contents in the past six years given you were going thru such a difficult time. Thank you again for your dedication and passion. May your mom rest in peace. Btw, this post itself is also very very well written and makes readers strongly shares the feelings you are having.

    1. James S Guest

      I'm sorry for your loss Lucky

  232. Fabrizio Guest

    So sorry Ben, my deepest condolences to you and your beautiful family.

  233. Nikojas Guest

    A beautiful tribute to your mom. It's such a sad day. Thank you for sharing with us, many of us have been reading your blog for over a decade and feel a connection to you even if we will never meet.
    I lost my mum 8 years ago and it is the most awful thing to go through but you have your family that will help give you comfort.

  234. Doug Guest

    I’ve been reading your blog for 11 years, and never commented… but I think your vulnerability, bravery, and simply beautifully written words have inspired me here. Thank you for sharing this; what a profoundly moving tribute. You are a gifted writer and storyteller. How fortunate are we that you apply your gifts to the miles and points space, and that your mom had such a great man for a son. Wishing you and your family...

    I’ve been reading your blog for 11 years, and never commented… but I think your vulnerability, bravery, and simply beautifully written words have inspired me here. Thank you for sharing this; what a profoundly moving tribute. You are a gifted writer and storyteller. How fortunate are we that you apply your gifts to the miles and points space, and that your mom had such a great man for a son. Wishing you and your family the best as you navigate this difficult time. Thank you for sharing this post.

  235. Fonzi Guest

    I do not have special wisdom to tell but yes you deserve the kind comments and this article made me cry. I want visit my mum for xmass and was thinking to postpone it for January. Now i will think twice.

  236. VSM Guest

    So incredibly hard..I am so so sorry. My partner. John, died this summer…unexpectedly and it has been very very hard…
    You carry her with you….and you bear a strong resemblance to her!

  237. TravelinWilly Diamond

    Where’s that KLM review we’ve all been waiting for?!

    I kid.

    It’s very very sad to read the news about your mom. But in seeing who you’ve become and who you’ve been able to surround yourself with, it’s a real testament to her, and a memory and legacy that you’ll have forever.

    The photo of her in LH first is wonderful. I’m tempted to print it out and frame it myself - it really captures...

    Where’s that KLM review we’ve all been waiting for?!

    I kid.

    It’s very very sad to read the news about your mom. But in seeing who you’ve become and who you’ve been able to surround yourself with, it’s a real testament to her, and a memory and legacy that you’ll have forever.

    The photo of her in LH first is wonderful. I’m tempted to print it out and frame it myself - it really captures something beautiful.

    Thank you for your tribute to her, and sharing where your head is; time will help you make sense of it.

    My deepest condolences to you and your family.

  238. HP Guest

    My condolences, Ben! Thank you for sharing your difficult journey! Rest in peace, Baba!

  239. Phil Guest

    Your grief is a reflection of how much love you have for her. Your mom may not be able to tell you how much she is overwhelmed by your love for her, but we will share that your love for her shines so brightly. All of us are sharing in your love and grief.

  240. guytp Guest

    What a wonderful post Ben. I remember reading when you first said you mum had been diagnosed. No words can offer any solice but this was a beautiful post that felt much more like I was reading something meaningful of the internet of 25 years ago. Thank you for sharing.

    1. Tom Guest

      This is a really beautiful tribute to your mom — I never have met her, but my life is made richer reading about a wonderful person. What an honor to her memory from you.

      I am a hospice and palliative care nurse, and have seen families go through similar situations (unexpected hospitalizations, scary symptoms, trying to imagine life without a loved one). I know that you met people to support you along the way,...

      This is a really beautiful tribute to your mom — I never have met her, but my life is made richer reading about a wonderful person. What an honor to her memory from you.

      I am a hospice and palliative care nurse, and have seen families go through similar situations (unexpected hospitalizations, scary symptoms, trying to imagine life without a loved one). I know that you met people to support you along the way, and I hope you will meet even others to help support you going forward. Thanks for sharing your mom with us.

  241. Moti Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss, Ben. I have always admired the way you included your parents in your travels and shared those moments in your posts. Your mom always came across as such a warm and adventurous spirit through your posts.

  242. Ole Guest

    Sorry for your loss. I hope god gives strength to your dad and Miles. The only consolation is as you said m, she won’t have to suffer any more.

  243. W Ho Guest

    Lucky, I am so sorry for your loss.
    Such is life.
    Please take care.
    I have been reading your blog for a decade.
    Thank you for everything you taught me on travel.
    Although I have outgrown travel blogs, you remain my most favored blogger.
    W. Ho

  244. Jake Guest

    My sincere condolences. Take lots of care!

  245. David Guest

    My condolences to you and your family.

    Thanks for sharing your Mom's experience with us.

  246. WestCoastFlyer Guest

    I am so sorry.

  247. Ken Guest

    My deepest condolences and thanks for sharing those nice words and reminders of how we should live our life. I am gonna to tell me parents I love them tomorrow

  248. Alex Z Guest

    Beautifully written, my condolences to you and your family

  249. Mike Y Guest

    That was such a beautiful post! Thanks so much for writing it. My sincere condolences.

  250. Jody West Guest

    I lost my mom to cancer this July. Much of what you said felt familiar. So sorry for your loss. May her memory be a blessing.

  251. tacrum43 Member

    A life well lived! So sorry for your loss Ben. You made the most of every moment and that is the best any of us can do. May your mom rest in well deserved peace.

    My own mom is aging rapidly and can no longer travel. I’m so glad we took the trips we did - Africa, Europe, South America, Asia. Your blog helped us do that with miles and travel in style. Thank you!

  252. Chris Guest

    Ben - this is a beautifully written post. Thank you for sharing all of your emotions resulting from this journey with your mom as well as your learnings from the experience. I had tears in my eyes throughout the post and appreciate your being transparent with all that you're feeling right now.

    Incorporating your humanity into your blog is what sets it apart. I love hearing about your passion for the industry, your excitement about...

    Ben - this is a beautifully written post. Thank you for sharing all of your emotions resulting from this journey with your mom as well as your learnings from the experience. I had tears in my eyes throughout the post and appreciate your being transparent with all that you're feeling right now.

    Incorporating your humanity into your blog is what sets it apart. I love hearing about your passion for the industry, your excitement about a new flight on a new airline as well as your joy in family and connection.

    Take care. Hold Ford, Miles, Jet, your dad and friends close. As you rightly say, those connections are so much more important than money, things or experiences even.

  253. Jcookjr06 New Member

    My condolences Ben…. Truly sorry for your loss.

  254. Andrew B Guest

    You were a great son to her, and she was clearly so proud of you. My thoughts are with you, friend.

  255. Michael Guest

    Sorry for your loss, my condolences to you.

    1. Vera G Guest

      Thank you for sharing. I relate to this on many levels, having lost my dear Dad to a long term illness. What a blessing it was to your Mom to have you for a son, especially when she needed you must. Wishing you peace.

  256. AdamH Diamond

    So sorry for your loss, Ben. May her memory always be a blessing.

  257. Jerry B Guest

    My deepest sympathies.What a beautiful post about your mom. You clearly were a wonderful support to her during her fight. May you find solace in the memories you created. My wife and I took care of both of our mothers in our home in their final years and yes there will be a painful emptiness in the coming days. But it while with time it will lessen it will never disappear. Be heartened by all...

    My deepest sympathies.What a beautiful post about your mom. You clearly were a wonderful support to her during her fight. May you find solace in the memories you created. My wife and I took care of both of our mothers in our home in their final years and yes there will be a painful emptiness in the coming days. But it while with time it will lessen it will never disappear. Be heartened by all the love and support you gave her. I guarantee it meant the world to her. May her memory be a blessing.

  258. Stephanie Guest

    I've been reading your blog for over a decade now and have gone on amazing trips that I never could have afforded with your help. Sending you my condolences. Your mom sounds like she was an amazing person.

  259. Stanley C Diamond

    Ben, I absolutely must disagree with your comment about skipping over this post. I cannot even imagine who out of your long time readers would want to do that. Your mom was an absolute angel for she raised a beautiful son and she was definitely a part of your travel blog. The amount of amazing and lovely trips you had with your mom gave us readers delightful content to read about day and night. I...

    Ben, I absolutely must disagree with your comment about skipping over this post. I cannot even imagine who out of your long time readers would want to do that. Your mom was an absolute angel for she raised a beautiful son and she was definitely a part of your travel blog. The amount of amazing and lovely trips you had with your mom gave us readers delightful content to read about day and night. I always looked forward to the trips you took with your mom because they were among the very best you had written. I am sure it was the deep love and respect you had for your mom which helped you along the way with your writing.

    It was a real blessing that your mom not only had you in her life but with Ford, Miles, and Jet as well. I always thought fondly of that trip you took with your dad, your mom, and your step-dad and how they nicknamed themselves the ‘three musketeers’. You have such a loving family.

    Your mother not only shared her care and warmth with you and your immediate family but she adored Winston as well because I think your mom had so much love to go around that her love was truly endless and appreciated by everyone who had the opportunity to meet her in real life. I offer to you my most heartfelt condolences for your loss though Ben your mom is now spending time together with your oldest brother where the two of them can watch over you and your family with love and care. You always mentioned how you think of as an extended part of your family but I think we also think of you and your family as a part of our extended family too so we all can understand the feeling you must be having now. Please take care of yourself and your family. Thank you for all of your wonderful blogs you had written these many years and so much more to come.

  260. WFB Guest

    Oh Ben, I'm so sorry. You are a very good son.

  261. Heidi Guest

    I’m so sorry for your loss!! Wonderful memories though. I hope those memories will help comfort you and your family.

  262. Ben02 Guest

    so sorry to hear your loss Ben! your mother was lucky to have you by her side. She had lived a fulfilling life. Sending thoughts and prayers to you and your loved ones.

    thank you for the reminder to appreciate every healthy moment and those around you

  263. Stellar Explorer Guest

    I'm so sorry, Ben. Your mom is so proud of what an amazing person you are and it is a great reflection of the mother she was. Sending you love.

  264. Victoria Guest

    Know that the passing of your darling mom clearly will leave a heartache no one can heal but you know that in you she leaves a memory sealed in your heart forever that you will treasure. Keep her close.

  265. Will (Boston) Guest

    Deepest condolences, Ben and family. Thank you so much for sharing your story. This helps me with my personal journey with a recent loss of my mother and I have many of the same emotions. Everyone please give your mother a very big hug if you still can.

  266. DENDAVE Gold

    So sorry to hear about your loss, but glad you got those few extra years, too. It's always been a joy hearing about your trips with her (and your dad).

  267. James Barry Guest

    My mother died five years ago. I came across a note she sent me years ago wishing me the best for an upcoming business trip which was ultimately successful. Our mothers always care for us and try to protect us.

    But this is about your mother, and I know how much you loved her. May her memory be a blessing.

  268. dander Guest

    thanks for sharing. Remember the good times you had with your mom

  269. Spiderman's girlfriend Guest

    I wish I could say some words to make you feel less sad right now. I can only tell you that it is a journey of emotions that will get better over time. Everybody copes differently. Your sons will bring you much brightness in your life now.

  270. CM Guest

    A beautiful tribute to your wonderful mum Ben! Thinking of you and Ford and sending my best to you both at this sad time.

  271. LeinadS Guest

    Sincerest and most heart-felt condolences. Know you are not alone in saying farewell to a loved one after a long illness. Godspeed and be well.

  272. JL Guest

    Hi Ben,
    I have been reading your blog everyday for the past 13 years.
    This is the saddest post I’ve read over all the 13 years, and it made me cry.
    I sincerely wish your mother will find peace in heaven and she will look after you from heaven.
    May she rest in peace, and I also hope you will be able to gradually find your place in life again.

  273. Morgan Diamond

    So sorry for your loss Ben. Thoughts and prayers with you and Ford. What a beautiful and fitting tribute to your mum.

  274. Mark Guest

    Dearest Ben-
    Thank you for sharing the update on your mom. That she no longer suffers is a blessing. It is easy for us on the sidelines to recognize that you've been a great son. I hope your boys are as good to you as you've been to you Mom and Dad.

    For over 15 years, my morning routine has included checking in with your brilliant writings. They share a wisdom and thoughtfulness...

    Dearest Ben-
    Thank you for sharing the update on your mom. That she no longer suffers is a blessing. It is easy for us on the sidelines to recognize that you've been a great son. I hope your boys are as good to you as you've been to you Mom and Dad.

    For over 15 years, my morning routine has included checking in with your brilliant writings. They share a wisdom and thoughtfulness that only comes from being exposed to amazing people during your upbringing. Based on how you've handled this journey (as evidence from your posts), it is clear you had a special bond with your mom that probably feels wholly different now. But everything you two shared is with you forever. May time give you peace and additional perspective on your mom's wonderfulness.

  275. Alan Guest

    Thanks for sharing with us, Ben. My condolences and take care.

  276. JoePro Guest

    Hurting for you today, Ben.
    My best to your family, with love.

  277. Alan Guest

    Thanks for sharing with us Ben. What a beautiful tribute. Take care.

  278. Drjoe Guest

    So sorry for your loss. I just lost my mom also. I live in the USA and she lived in Germany. Saw her a few weeks before she passed but did not get to say goodbye.

  279. MikeA Guest

    A wonderful tribute! Seems like she was very proud of you and your family:) I can't think of a better way to make her proud than to keep on blogging and travelling the hell out of the world!

  280. Andrew Guest

    Thank you for such a lovely post, Ben. It’s so helpful to hear others perspective on losing a parent. All the love to you & your family!

  281. SeatacFlyer Guest

    Sorry for your loss Ben.

  282. John Guest

    I'm so sorry to hear, Ben. My deepest condolences

  283. PM1 Gold

    Is there a charity that your mom would have wanted to support? Please share as it's something I would love to do in her memory.

  284. Plane Jane Guest

    So sad to hear about the passing of your mother, Ben. Your love for her is so evident in this post and in many many others.

  285. PM1 Gold

    I am so sorry Ben. Your blog has been one that I've followed for the longest ~15 years and I admire your sincerity, honesty and commitment to family. So glad your mom was able to meet Ford and especially your sons and spent time with them knowing that you were surrounded with love. Thanks for writing so candidly about such a trying situation.

  286. Serge T Guest

    Hi Ben, sending love and care for you and the rest of your loved ones including your kids. Beautiful tribute to your mom. It is ok to feel lost and sad and everyone deals with grief differently. I lost my dad during Covid and it happened quick and as you mentioned without being able to say goodbye. We all come with an expiration date we just do not know what that is. So like you...

    Hi Ben, sending love and care for you and the rest of your loved ones including your kids. Beautiful tribute to your mom. It is ok to feel lost and sad and everyone deals with grief differently. I lost my dad during Covid and it happened quick and as you mentioned without being able to say goodbye. We all come with an expiration date we just do not know what that is. So like you said, cherish your times together because we do not know when they will end. On a side note, interestingly I never wanted to have a tattoo ever in my life. But the moment my dad died while crying it came to my mind I wanted to have a tattoo of his signature on the side of my body close to my heart. Again much hugs and encouragement to you.

  287. Johnny Jet Guest

    Hey Ben,

    I'm so sorry about your mom. Reading your post brought back memories of the same thing I dealt with my mother's death. It was the worst day of my life and the following few weeks were a blur. Unfortunately, you will never get over it but it does get easier to cope with time. Here are some poems that helped me and my siblings cope. https://johnnyjet.com/a-tribute-to-my-mother/ All the best

  288. DV Guest

    You seem like a great son, I hope you and your family find some measure of comfort.

  289. David O Guest

    May her memory be a blessing.

  290. AZO_Tim Guest

    Your love for your mother is a beautiful thing. Thank you for sharing it with us. Sending you lots of love and peace during this difficult time.

  291. uldguy Diamond

    Ben, I am so, so, sorry for your loss. Your mom was such a remarkable woman and there’s no doubt she helped make you into the great man you’ve become. You’re fortunate to have two wonderful and accepting parents in your life. Always cherish her memory. I know it’s a cliche, but time will heal your pain. Lean on Ford, I’m sure he’s there for you. You both are in my thoughts.

    If I...

    Ben, I am so, so, sorry for your loss. Your mom was such a remarkable woman and there’s no doubt she helped make you into the great man you’ve become. You’re fortunate to have two wonderful and accepting parents in your life. Always cherish her memory. I know it’s a cliche, but time will heal your pain. Lean on Ford, I’m sure he’s there for you. You both are in my thoughts.

    If I may share a story with you, I took my first flight at the age of 13, Northwest Orient 356 MSP-RST, $17.00 round trip (a 21 day APEX fare!). I know it’s silly, but during climb out from MSP I was hoping to see glimpses of those who have passed in the clouds. To me that was heaven, I figured they just moved from cloud to cloud, avoiding planes as best they could. Your mom, and your brother, are again together in the clouds. Next time you fly, take a look. They’re there, and they will always be there for you, Ford, Miles, Jett, and Winston too. Take care of yourself and your family.

  292. Allison Guest

    Years ago, when my dad passed, a friend told me (possibly attributed to Queen Elizabeth):
    “Grief is the price we pray for loving someone.” So grateful for love in my life and yours. God bless you!

  293. GringoLoco Gold

    However death arrives, it's never easy for those left behind. Much love to you and yours in these trying times.

  294. RealTaylor Diamond

    What a beautiful post - thank you for sharing your journey and life with us. I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss and appreciate you and this site.

  295. Migs from LHR Guest

    Like I said on my first ever comment a while ago, we come here to stop thinking of our own lives and to jump into your world.

    So today, I can only say thank you for sharing your unfiltered thoughts with us - once again.

    You are not alone!
    ;-)

    PS: If you ever come to Windsor, UK, and have some time to spare, it’d be my pleasure to show you two (or 3 if dad also comes) around. I’d love to introduce you to my husband too.

  296. yoe Guest

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts. My mom passed away 7 years ago.As you said we need to be grateful for had our mother for so long time.Many children's lost theirs mother in early stay of life.

  297. Julie Guest

    All the Best, Ben. So sorry about your mother.

  298. JonJon Guest

    Thank you for this post. An amazing tribute to your mom, and the love she shared with the world.

  299. Tim Dunn Diamond

    Thank you for the beautiful tribute to your mother. You have been blessed. Know that she will be cheering you on even more than she could before. May peace and comfort overflow for you

  300. Jim Morehead Guest

    BEN- you needn’t apologize and I read the whole thing and I’m beat up often for a long messages but to describe something and to say what’s really on your mind messages usually have to be long and yours was good long and from your heart so read sentence number one again.
    You got time with your mom and I think it’s worse sometimes when you don’t when someone dies unexpectedly in a car...

    BEN- you needn’t apologize and I read the whole thing and I’m beat up often for a long messages but to describe something and to say what’s really on your mind messages usually have to be long and yours was good long and from your heart so read sentence number one again.
    You got time with your mom and I think it’s worse sometimes when you don’t when someone dies unexpectedly in a car on airplane or shooting somewhere so at least you had time and you said your goodbyes man hopefully you’ll meet again.

    So keep being yourself and writing and I promise you, I’ll be reading JIM

  301. Fredd Member

    Kathy and I send our condolences, Ben. You are in our thoughts and prayers. As parents and grandparents, we recognize a truly good son when we see one, and hope that's some small comfort to you at this time.

    With our best wishes,
    Brian aka Fredd

  302. MH Member

    Thank you for this post and tribute to a magnificent woman and beautiful soul. May you find peace knowing that she is no longer in pain in the days and weeks to come. For many long-time readers, it seems as if we have been right alongside you and your mom ever since her first diagnosis. And just as you have enriched our lives with your words and opened your family life to us, we share...

    Thank you for this post and tribute to a magnificent woman and beautiful soul. May you find peace knowing that she is no longer in pain in the days and weeks to come. For many long-time readers, it seems as if we have been right alongside you and your mom ever since her first diagnosis. And just as you have enriched our lives with your words and opened your family life to us, we share the grief and sorrow of this day. I hope you find comfort knowing that your presence by her side has undoubtedly contributed to her longevity and the memories you made will last forever.

  303. David Chao Guest

    My sincere condolences for your loss. Ive been reading your blog for well over a decade and this is my first comment - I’d like to say that this post exemplifies why I read your blog every day. You write from the heart. You humanize the travel experience. And for that, I thank you. And your mother, she taught you well.

  304. robbo Guest

    Not selfish at all, She sounds like a remarkable lady. I am so sorry for you and your family. But you're right, she is in peace and comfort now. And the best thing is, they are always with you. A simple smell from your childhood, an occasional motion someone makes that your Mum did and even an verbal expression that your Mum used will come back and you'll say "Mum used to say that" and...

    Not selfish at all, She sounds like a remarkable lady. I am so sorry for you and your family. But you're right, she is in peace and comfort now. And the best thing is, they are always with you. A simple smell from your childhood, an occasional motion someone makes that your Mum did and even an verbal expression that your Mum used will come back and you'll say "Mum used to say that" and you will have a tinge of sadness and then a tinge of happiness because you remembered. She's in good hands mate. Take care.

  305. Mary P Guest

    Thank you so much for sharing this. I am experiencing the end of life of my mom as well and I thank you for so profoundly sharing your pain. You said some very important things about what really matters in life-I am grateful that you reminded us all about this truth. May you rest in her memory and find peace and comfort in living out her legacy

  306. KL Guest

    Sadly, too many of us have lost loved ones to cancer. I am sorry for your loss, but I know you have many wonderful memories. K

  307. mandy Guest

    Thank you for sharing your mom with us. She seems like a wonderful woman -- full of joy and love. May her memory be a blessing. Wishing you and your family peace.

  308. RovinMoses Guest

    Wonderful tribute to your mom whose spirit will never leave you. Best wishes for comfort and joyful memories.

  309. Johnny McKay Guest

    Beautiful post Ben.

  310. Ellie Guest

    What a beautiful dedication to your mother. I'm so sorry for your loss. Your mother sounds like an amazing person and you convey her spirit and warmth so well with your words. It's clear that she loved you and you love her so much, and that is truly a beautiful thing to behold. Her spirit will live on in you and to the kids as well. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Make...

    What a beautiful dedication to your mother. I'm so sorry for your loss. Your mother sounds like an amazing person and you convey her spirit and warmth so well with your words. It's clear that she loved you and you love her so much, and that is truly a beautiful thing to behold. Her spirit will live on in you and to the kids as well. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Make sure you take care of yourself well, and more importantly, find the words to tell those around you if and what they can do to support you (e.g. silently hold your hand, listen to you ramble, give you space, hug you, cook for you, keep the kids occupied for an hour or two so you can reflect). Especially with a young family, it can be hard to carve that time for yourself. Please do take care and may she truly be at peace.

  311. Ron Bruder Guest

    Ben,

    Thank you for courageously sharing your journey. My heartfelt condolences to you and your family. Your mom sounds like a special lady. And I'm sure while many are mourning her loss, they are also cherishing that she was in their life.

    Selfishly, thank you for the reminder to appreciate every healthy moment and those around you.

    Take care,

    Ron

  312. Casey Guest

    What a beautiful post and remembrance. Thanks so much for sharing, and wishing you the best in this difficult time.

  313. San Guest

    My condolences. This is a beautiful tribute to a wonderful human being.

  314. walester Gold

    Ben, I - like so many others - have been following your writing for many years, and your openness, candor, and honesty have made me feel like I’ve gotten to know not just you, but also your family in some small way. I’m deeply sorry for your loss. From the way you’ve written about your mother, it’s clear she was an extraordinary woman who shaped your life in lasting ways. May her memory always be...

    Ben, I - like so many others - have been following your writing for many years, and your openness, candor, and honesty have made me feel like I’ve gotten to know not just you, but also your family in some small way. I’m deeply sorry for your loss. From the way you’ve written about your mother, it’s clear she was an extraordinary woman who shaped your life in lasting ways. May her memory always be a blessing, and may you find comfort in the love and stories you carry forward.

  315. Adam Guest

    Thank you for sharing, Ben - hoping your pain will give way to the joy of memory over time. Sending hugs.

  316. ARW Guest

    May her memory be a blessing.

  317. Runnercm Guest

    Sending you all the love and more . What a beautiful mom and loving son.

  318. Jon Guest

    I’m so sorry for your loss

  319. Sally Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart breaks reading this. :( Thank you for sharing this beautiful article honoring your mom. You guys are in my thoughts.

  320. CM Guest

    Ben I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Your mom was an incredible person it sounds like. I’m sending love to your family. Thank you for being so authentic on this blog.

  321. MeanMeosh Gold

    Lucky, I am very sorry for your loss. Sending warm thoughts from our family. This was a touching tribute to your mom.

  322. Ollie Guest

    I'm sorry for your loss Ben and condolences to you and your family. Thank you for sharing your story today.

  323. Tonyr Guest

    Im so sorry for your loss. Your mom sounds like a very special lady that you were lucky to have in your life. Hang in there, remember all of the good times, and may she rest in peace now.

  324. Ryan Guest

    Beautiful post Lucky. Great words of wisdom to remember in these crazy times. My condolences to you and your family.

  325. Dustygs New Member

    Processing your grief is one of the most difficult things you will experience. But over time the grief can be experienced as an incredible gift. At the least expected times the grief will come back and you will be reunited with the “awe” of your mom. Blessings for your mom and your family.

  326. JK-SFO Guest

    Lucky Coins,

    I'm so very sorry for your loss. Thank you for including the wonderful photos - the joy shown by your mother is beautiful - and for including us in your life. It is clear how proud your mom was of you and your family and how much she loved you!

    Grieving is a very long process but time does help one recall more of the good times and the special moments. May you...

    Lucky Coins,

    I'm so very sorry for your loss. Thank you for including the wonderful photos - the joy shown by your mother is beautiful - and for including us in your life. It is clear how proud your mom was of you and your family and how much she loved you!

    Grieving is a very long process but time does help one recall more of the good times and the special moments. May you have comfort when you need it and peace when you are ready for it. With much love and care,

    JK-SFO

  327. Lars Guest

    My condolences. Thank you for sharing and being so open

  328. Davide Guest

    My condolences, sending you a hug from Italy

  329. Jay Guest

    Thank you for sharing your loss. I wish you inner peace.

  330. Jake212 Guest

    Your mother was very beautiful. I can’t imagine a better last gift to her than her son laying next to her as she passed. You are seen Ben, peace be with you and your family.

  331. Sebastian Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss, Ben. Deepest condolences to you and your family. A beautiful tribute

  332. Chris A Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss.

  333. NomadDC Member

    @Ben My deepest condolences on your loss.

  334. FranP Guest

    So sorry for you loss. I’ve been following your story for years and was always happy to hear of your travels together and wonderful memories you created. May she RIP.

  335. RetiredATLATC Diamond

    I'm sorry for your loss Ben. She sounds like an amazing human being.

  336. Bill Guest

    I am sorry for your loss! That was a great tribute to your mom! While I don’t know your family, I’ve been following you for 10-15 years or so, so I feel like I know them through your posts, and it really moved me! I loved reading about the trips you took with your mom! I lost both my parents in 2020 and it still hurts, so I can relate! My thoughts are with you and your family during this difficult time!

  337. AK Guest

    Travel is about spending time creating memories and meaning in life. I can't think of a more relevant post. No one can ever take those away from you and you help us remember that and remember why we care about all of this every day.

    So sorry for your loss. I hope the memories you created give you comfort.

  338. Tucsonbabe Guest

    You are a good son and she was obviously a marvelous mother. You are both very fortunate.

  339. Judith Walter Guest

    I’m so sorry to hear of your pain and suffering. It’s extremely hard to lose your mom because there’s nobody in this world that can replace your mom and it stays with you forever but you have so many good memories, what you wrote was so beautiful. I think she would be so proud of you. Thank you so much for sharing your love for your mom, your love shines through and she’s in a better place and you’ll see her one day.

  340. Mike L Guest

    I’ve never commented before but I’ve enjoyed reading your blog for many years. The love for your mum is so clear and I’m very sorry for your loss. Love and thoughts with you from the UK

  341. Emtbsam Guest

    In time, I trust you will have only wonderful memories of your mother. For now, I hope it helps to know that others understand and care. I am one of the lucky few who had stage III 3 OVCA 18 years ago. Not a day goes by that I am not thankful. I wish you and your mother peace.

  342. Joyce Nestor Guest

    I’m so sorry for your loss. The loss of a parent, especially our mother, is harder than we feel we can bear. You were a good son, and she made it through those hard days because you were there. God bless you and your family as you travel through the grief.

  343. Jetagain Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss. You were indeed fortunate to have such a wonderful mom.

  344. shoeguy Guest

    You are part of my daily routine. I think your blog is amazing. I'm sorry for your loss and deeply appreciate all you bring to this community.

  345. ILYA KIBLITSKY Guest

    Other than one or two forms of news-you’re my morning ritual. I’ve been following you for over a decade, every day. When your mom was diagnosed, it’s not apparent to most, but you grew as a man-coinciding with the birth of your son, and it showed in the content. She must’ve been a great woman to raise a great man. My condolence Ben

    -Ilya

  346. Mike Guest

    I’m so sorry for your loss Ben. Your mom was a special woman and I loved reading about your relationship. Read your blog daily and think of you all as family.
    Mike

  347. WSC Guest

    As many Mom's would say "You did good!"

    And now she is taking her pride in you, and sharing the joy you brought her with your family, and the journeys you took together while sipping a glass of wine and pain free again.

    Rest your heart and soul that she is finally free again

    Hugs

  348. Austin Member

    I'm so incredibly sorry, Ben. Your blog has been a big part of my life over the last decade - it's inspired me, and the way you move through the world with such grace, optimism, and authenticity is no short feat. Also - you have absolutely *nothing* to apologize for in prioritizing time with family, and especially your mom - while we've never met, I cannot fathom anyone saying you have let them down.

    When...

    I'm so incredibly sorry, Ben. Your blog has been a big part of my life over the last decade - it's inspired me, and the way you move through the world with such grace, optimism, and authenticity is no short feat. Also - you have absolutely *nothing* to apologize for in prioritizing time with family, and especially your mom - while we've never met, I cannot fathom anyone saying you have let them down.

    When you're ready, I highly recommend reading this quick, powerful comment on reddit comparing grieving the loss of a loved one to a shipwreck. It's something I've bookmarked for years, and it's helped me through several losses. https://www.reddit.com/r/Assistance/comments/hax0t/comment/c1u0rx2/

    1. Timtamtrak Diamond

      Thanks for sharing that Reddit post. Very nicely written.

  349. UnitedGS Guest

    My sincerest condolences, Ben. I have been reading this blog daily for over a decade and have had several incredible travel experiences thanks to your writing. Thank you for telling this story and all the others. Wishing you the best.

  350. Susan Williams Guest

    I’m so very sorry for your loss. Your mother sounds like a remarkable woman and I’m sure she drew great comfort from you and your family. May your memories of her bring you comfort. My father, who died of cancer at home under the care of a palliative care doctor also lived much longer than expected after his diagnosis. At one point his doctor startled me by telling me that he should already have passed...

    I’m so very sorry for your loss. Your mother sounds like a remarkable woman and I’m sure she drew great comfort from you and your family. May your memories of her bring you comfort. My father, who died of cancer at home under the care of a palliative care doctor also lived much longer than expected after his diagnosis. At one point his doctor startled me by telling me that he should already have passed away, given the progression of the disease, but that he was clearly finding enough joy in life to stay alive. Maybe the same was true for your mother until close to the end.

  351. Brian Guest

    My thoughts and prayers are with you. You mum sounds like a very special person. I am glad that you were able to spend so much time with her in recent years and that she got to spend so much time with your sons.
    My adult daughter who lives with us has just been diagnosed with cancer mid year, so we are on the chemo journey.
    Look after yourself and be kind to yourself and be proud of what a wonderful son that you are.
    Regards
    Brian

  352. Lukas Guest

    I’m truly sorry for your loss. I’ve been a daily reader for 10+ years, and I really want to thank you for sharing these moments as well.

  353. Scottino Guest

    Health is wealth. Fruit does not fall far from the tree. Your greatness is due to your Mum. Your dividend to her was your never ending love and she will have parted with no greater pleasure than enjoying how well she raised her Son….

  354. Alpha Golf Guest

    So very sorry Ben. May her memory be a blessing - clearly it is. You were wonderful to her, and it’s great that she got to meet your sons. God bless.

  355. Matt Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss. You are amazing and I am sure she was incredibly proud of you.

  356. Myra Demeter Guest

    This post is Incredibly brave and meaningful. I am so sorry for your loss - but your sharing sends a very special message. I hope that I and others can take your words and live them daily. From your description Your Mom was a giving person who instilled meaning into your life and from your sharing, ahe has entered mine.

  357. muhadi New Member

    Sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace

  358. Dan Guest

    You’re such an incredibly strong son. She would be so proud of the sacrifices you made to make the most of your time since her diagnosis.
    So sorry for your loss and thank you for this beautiful tribute to your mom x

  359. Aziz Guest

    Thank you for telling your story. Losing a mother is one of the hardest things, and my thoughts are with you and your family during this difficult time. May her memory bring you comfort and strength.

  360. Baptiste Guest

    Lucky, I am so sorry for your loss and I address my condolences to you and your whole family. I have been reading you for the best part of 10 years so I have this strange sense of knowing you closely even though we have never met. I will extend a metaphorical arm around your shoulders as you grieve, but know that you have inspired me over all these years to cherish the time with my loved ones, as you have documented on this blog.

  361. Jeleyne Guest

    My condolences. Your mom sounds a lot like mine was. The grief will gradually taper off, but it also will come at you out of the blue at times, triggered by tiny things when you're least expecting it. Be kind to yourself in the strangeness of your altered reality. It may always feel like there's an empty space in the universe, but your mom will never be far away.

  362. Laura Guest

    My dad just passed away on hospice with a broken hip after a long struggle with Alzheimer’s. While not nearly the same as cancer, like you, we live each day and lose them by inches. My condolences to you and your family, and I am grateful she got to meet both your boys before she passed. Thank you for sharing.

  363. Pam Guest

    What a beautiful tribute. Your mom was lucky to have such a wonderful son.

  364. Ivor Clarke Guest

    Oh Ben - I'm so sorry. I've been following you (and your family's) journey for a long time, and it's very sad to hear of your mom's passing.

  365. Neal Zaslavsky Guest

    May her memory be a blessing to you and your family.

  366. sbams Guest

    My thoughts are with you and I wish you all the strength in the coming period. My sister passed away 2 days ago and I am now here to deal with her legacy. But nothing will ever compare to losing your Mom. I am nearly 10 years on since I lost mine and I am feeling your loss as my own. Be strong and take care

  367. Mark R Guest

    Ben, I too lost my Mother to cancer, in 2018. Although I was given plenty of time to come to terms with her situation, the last days were hard and thanks to hospice, I knew the signs were there. It cripples us to lose our parents. Yes, I was glad her pain was over, but I think of her all the time and situations can easily bring the tears flowing. I focus on the good times. Stay strong and smile for your loving mother !

  368. Jeff S Guest

    Thank you for sharing your story, for being brave enough to share your feelings and for the community you’ve created. Thinking about you and your family…and your mom. I’m sorry for your loss. ❤️

  369. Carole Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss. I know her memory is a blessing.

  370. Judy Guest

    Ben, condolences to you and the rest of your family, and thanks for sharing the news. As another long time reader (and health care professional) I have wondered if you would post about her passing. Take care.
    PS selfishly I am extra sad. I live in St. Pete and always wanted to run in to you somewhere and say Hi.

  371. Joao Goldmeier Guest

    I'm so sorry for you loss Ben, been here a very long time and the trip reports with both your parents were the best ones. May she rest in peace.

  372. Douglas Bishop Guest

    Ben, I am so sorry to hear about your mother's passing. I am glad that you were able to share so much time with your mom and to watch her with your children. It sounds like her essence shined brightly when she was with them.
    I have appreciated that occasionally you include us in your family news. For me, it has set your work apart. Thank you.

  373. Robin Guest

    Sending my sincerest condolences for you, Ford, and your whole family. I was diagnosed with stage three ovarian in 2014. At the same time I was found to be BRCA1. I don’t know why I am still here at 11 years later with no reoccurrence. As I am child- and partner-free, I feel guilty when other woman pass from this disease. For her sake, I hope there is a heaven to enjoy the time she missed with her other son.

  374. Michael Guest

    Sincere condolences Ben.

  375. Lara D Guest

    Thank you for sharing your heartfelt and poignant story about your mom. She sounds like an amazing woman, mother, grandmother and friend. Take time to grieve and cherish all of your memories. Gosh, if my son grows up to be like you (he is 17), I will so lucky.

  376. Alonso Guest

    Thank you, Ben, for sharing such a deep and touching story. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Your mother was clearly a beautiful woman, and she leaves behind a wonderful legacy in you and your family. May she rest in peace. Tailwinds.

  377. Eamonn Dundon Guest

    Thank you so much for this heartfelt post and for letting us follow along on the amazing trips you took with your mother over the last six years. This blog has been a daily part of my life for nearly 15 years and your mom must be so proud of you for building a career out of your passion without ever compromising on your ethics or approach to this work.

    My thoughts and sincere...

    Thank you so much for this heartfelt post and for letting us follow along on the amazing trips you took with your mother over the last six years. This blog has been a daily part of my life for nearly 15 years and your mom must be so proud of you for building a career out of your passion without ever compromising on your ethics or approach to this work.

    My thoughts and sincere condolences are with you, your mom's partner, and all who knew and loved her. In the past two years, I've seen my parents become grandparents and there is truly nothing like the light in their faces when they get to spend time with grandchildren. I am so grateful she got the chance for that light with Miles and Jet.

  378. HJToday Guest

    Oh Ben, this hurts my heart. Losing a parent is so hard. You are a wonderful son, and did a great job giving your mom's last years so much joy and meaning. Your advice is spot on regarding life and remembering what is important. Take good care of yourself and be gentle and understanding if you are easily irritated, angry, or sad. Also, denial is a coping mechanism, and it is okay to use sometimes...

    Oh Ben, this hurts my heart. Losing a parent is so hard. You are a wonderful son, and did a great job giving your mom's last years so much joy and meaning. Your advice is spot on regarding life and remembering what is important. Take good care of yourself and be gentle and understanding if you are easily irritated, angry, or sad. Also, denial is a coping mechanism, and it is okay to use sometimes if you need it. Your mom's beautiful legacy will live on in you, and may her memory be a blessing. I'll be thinking of you and sending healing thoughts your way.

  379. Andrew Guest

    May her brightness be your guiding light going forward...with a smile of gratefulness.

  380. Timtamtrak Diamond

    Thank you for sharing with us, Ben. This is a beautifully written eulogy. I don’t know if you always realize how much you make us readers a part of your family because it’s your natural style, but you really make us feel like a part of your family. There is a different tone and light when you write about your family, Ford, or Miles & Jet. It’s not you that doesn’t deserve us, it’s the other way around. I wish you and yours peace and love as you grieve.

  381. Peter Guest

    a truly heartfult post and thanks for sharing. Very sorry for your loss, Ben

  382. Bob Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom a few months ago and it's an indescribable feeling of frustration, anger and sadness but also relief that they are no longer suffering. There are no emotions right now that you should consider selfish or unjustified.

  383. Steve Guest

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, Ben. May your mom’s memory be a blessing.

  384. Ty Guest

    Dear Ben,

    Big hugs all the way from Australia.

    Thank you for sharing your mom's journey with all of us. I know it is a very special thing and it must have taken a lot of courage to write up this post.

    It is so great to know that you got to spend lots of quality time with your lovely mom and I am sure she loved every single moment of them.

    Be easy on you during this time.

    Regards,
    Ty

  385. BRIAN BYRNES Guest

    Ben, Sincere sympathy on your Mom's passing. May God be good to her.

  386. Star Guest

    Thanks for sharing your story. You are a very good son and you will have peace of mind of what you have done when your mom still alive. Not many children can do that. Your mom is now in heaven with God and all the angels.

  387. saschadj New Member

    My condolences Ben. Thank you for sharing her story with us. And I appreciate you sharing the advice about caring for each other and taking your loved ones on a trip. Words to live by and something we all need to hear.

  388. WJ Guest

    Sorry for your loss Ben. Wishing you and your family the best in these difficult times.

  389. VKji Guest

    A parent can never be replaced Ben. Your Mom has gone to a better place & her suffering is now over.
    May your Mum rest in peace.

  390. Alfredbali Guest

    Been ready your blog almost daily for 12+ years, my heartful condolences.

  391. Lane K Guest

    I’m so sorry for your loss. Your Mom raised a good man. I’m grateful for you taking the time to share something from the heart. Our world needs more love like this.

  392. JC Edwards Guest

    Mein aufrichtiges Beileid, lieber Ben. What a beautiful tribute to your Mutti you are share with us. May she fly in Heaven better than in first class!

  393. gstork Guest

    Ben - I am so sad for the loss that you and your family are going through. But your thoughtfulness and courage through all this says everything about what a wonderful mother you had, and that she raised a wonderful son. Thank you for sharing your journey through such a personal and painful time.

    I lost both my parents when I was in my 20’s, about 5 years apart. Not a day goes by...

    Ben - I am so sad for the loss that you and your family are going through. But your thoughtfulness and courage through all this says everything about what a wonderful mother you had, and that she raised a wonderful son. Thank you for sharing your journey through such a personal and painful time.

    I lost both my parents when I was in my 20’s, about 5 years apart. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of them (even 30 years later), and I am so grateful for everything they gave me, and for the time we had together.

    Hopefully you might find some solace in knowing that she will always be with you, even if not in the physical sense. You are a part of her, and she lives on in you and your kids.

  394. Rudy Guest

    Long time reader of your site. One of my two daily reads. Loved your work for a long time, and benefited from your knowledge many times!
    Sending condolences to you and your family. I hope the send off is a special one

  395. Scott M Guest

    Ben - I've been a loyal ready for a long long time, way back to the airliners.net days.

    I'm so very sorry for your loss, your tribute to your mom was truly heartwarming. The way you found the words to express such deep emotions is inspiring.

    With that, I just got off the phone with my brother and father, and we’re now in the process of booking a trip for January. My dad...

    Ben - I've been a loyal ready for a long long time, way back to the airliners.net days.

    I'm so very sorry for your loss, your tribute to your mom was truly heartwarming. The way you found the words to express such deep emotions is inspiring.

    With that, I just got off the phone with my brother and father, and we’re now in the process of booking a trip for January. My dad is 75 and still able to travel, so we’re making the most of this opportunity. Thank you for giving me the push to make it happen.

    Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. May your mom’s memory be a blessing.

  396. Alex Guest

    I’m a long time lurker, but as a human, fan, and someone you helped come to terms with being gay, I’m so sorry for your loss Ben.

  397. Mark Guest

    I think 375 messages makes a real statement about the people on this blog.

    Thank you Ben, for sharing your story with us. It would have made mom happy to read your words, I'm certain.

    If the rest of you can read this story without a tear in your eye, you are doing better than I could.

  398. Mary Niehaus Guest

    So very sorry for your loss, Ben. My mother died in April, and I also spent the last several days with her in the hospital after a long period of illness, so I know how you feel. Sending you a big hug.

    And I love your blog. I am a fellow travelaholic (just got back from Mongolia, went to Greenland in August).

  399. Marek Guest

    Keep your spirits up in these difficult times

  400. Bill n DC Diamond

    Truly sorry for your loss. You wrote a wonderful story with the most beautiful last heading “ Give your loved ones a hug, be kind, and take that trip”
    When my Mom passed, I started telling people whose Mom was still with us to Hug their Mom for me. And of course I hug a lot of Moms I encourage you to do likewise
    Best wishes for moving forward

  401. Mose Guest

    May her memory be a blessing. Your vulnerability and openness are greatly appreciated, Ben. Loss doesn’t have mean that their love is gone. Wishing you and family well during this difficult period. -M

  402. Praneeth Guest

    Hi Ben, your mother was clearly an incredible woman, full of grit, determination, and a zeal to live. Please accept my condolences on her passing. Losing a parent is never easy. May she find peace, and may God give you the strength to face this.

  403. ConcordeBoy Diamond

    Condolences Ben!

  404. Paganini Guest

    Ben - my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I am so sorry for your loss.

  405. Alison Guest

    What a lovely tribute to your mom. I am so sorry for your loss. The best piece of advice I got when going through a similar situation many years ago is that you have to go through the pain to get to the other side. Don’t try to avoid it, you only delay it. Hugs to you and your family.

  406. Benson Guest

    My deepest condolences. Be comforted in knowing she is now comfortable and at peace

  407. Alex Guest

    Praying for strength and comfort for your family.

  408. Giorgi Guest

    My condolences! My mother died as well from same type of cancer, it was an incredible battle for her 10+ years against all ecxpectations with 3 surgeries, 100+ chemo therapies and multiple visits of best doctors in 3 different countries…
    In the end it was excepted but still very painful.

    Thanks for sharing this personal post a lot!

  409. Nevsky Gold

    Ben, Thank you for the story. My deepest condolences.

  410. Mary McCombie Guest

    My deepest condolences to you, Ben. Losing one's mother, no matter how expected or prepared, is an enormous loss. My mom had pancreatic cancer and faced her fate much like your mom, graceful and eager to live life to the fullest. Remember all the good stuff.

  411. Henry Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss Ben. I lost my father to cancer...it is an ugly disease. I, too, spent as much time as possible with him including his last night...I find peace in knowing that he knew how much he meant to me...just as your mother clearly did about you. Grief comes at us in mysterious ways...be kind to yourself.

  412. Patrick Guest

    So sorry for your loss, Ben. Your Mum sounds like she was an amazing woman. May her soul rest in peace.

  413. Mark Lehman Guest

    Our sincere condolences to both of you, your children and extended family. Losing your mother is a devastating experience; however, as I was so wisely guided by a close friend years ago upon the death of my father, it also provides an opportunity for growth and learning. If nothing else, it's a wake up call that our time on this planet is limited and that we must use every moment to its best possible advantage....

    Our sincere condolences to both of you, your children and extended family. Losing your mother is a devastating experience; however, as I was so wisely guided by a close friend years ago upon the death of my father, it also provides an opportunity for growth and learning. If nothing else, it's a wake up call that our time on this planet is limited and that we must use every moment to its best possible advantage. Like you, that includes taking every opportunity to visit as many wonderful places you can and meet as many amazing people as is possible, during the days ahead.
    Thanks as always for sharing your experiences and providing so many travel tips and ideas. You've made my life and those of my family members, immensely better.

  414. Alex Guest

    Dear Ben,
    My deepest condolences for your loss. I wish you and your family all the strength you need in this difficult time of grief. May you find comfort in all the wonderful memories of your Mum, and in the fact that she lived to see her grandkids.
    My thoughts are with you!

  415. cyberderm Guest

    Ben and Ford and Miles and Jet - I am sorry for your loss. I am a long term reader and fan and appreciate how you have helped so many road warriors. Your mom is hopefully smiling down from a luxury first class suite in Heaven.

  416. Nancy Guest

    I'm so sorry to hear this! My sincere condolences.

  417. MH Guest

    May her memory be for a blessing. She was lucky to have you as her son.

  418. Marianne Guest

    Hi Ben, I'm very, very sorry for your loss. I've been following your blog for more than 10 years and always enjoyed the personal stories and the trips you took with your family the most, which inspired me also to treat my parents on bucketlist trips. Thank you for sharing all those memorable experiences and this heartfelt tribute to your mom. Sending all my thoughts and condolences to you and your family.

  419. Garrett Guest

    What a lovely tribute to a wonderful woman. My best to you and your family in the rough days ahead. xx

  420. Brian Guest

    Ben, very sorry for your loss. Thanks for all the great work on the blog.

  421. Wandering Guest

    So sorry to hear this, Ben. It certainly has been a wild ride, and I hope both you and your Mom are at peace. Bless you both.

  422. lex Guest

    so sorry for your loss ben. sincerest condolences to you and your family. i lost my mom this february and the pain is still very fresh.

  423. Thomas Guest

    … just a sincere hug from Germany ❤️
    Thomas

  424. Drew Guest

    I'm so sorry Ben. My thoughts are with you and your family. I'm so sorry for your loss.

  425. Xavier Guest

    Ben you inspire more people than you realize. It sounds like your Mom was an amazing person.

    Remember, "A women dies two deaths, when her body dies and the last time her name is spoken."

  426. DiscoPapa Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss, Ben.

  427. Karine Guest

    Thank you Ben for sharing your story. I am a flight attendant and had the pleasure of having you on board once. Your story left me in tears, as I am currently taking care of my mum suffering from Alzheimer and forgetting about me and her grand daughter a bit more every day .... It is heart breaking.
    I follow the advices you give and make the most of each day.
    You and your family are in my prayers tonight.

  428. philwupdx Member

    Thank you, Ben, for that deeply personal and poignant tribute to your mom. Your family is remarkable for the love and devotion you share with each other, and your mom's memory will always be with you. However, Keep her spirit alive with Miles and Jet as they grow up, since their experiences and memories of your mom so early in their lives will easily be lost. Be well!

  429. Dunc Guest

    Thank you for taking us on your longest journey. With deepest condolences to you, Dad and your amazing family. Some follow your journey not for your travel but for who you are. Hugs.

  430. Zach Guest

    Ben,

    Been reading your writing since the very beginning, and to my surprise this is unexpectedly emotional for me to read. My sincere condolences. I'm very glad you were able to spend some amazing moments with her and wish that I can do the same with my families and friends. Stay strong.

  431. GK Guest

    Also a reader for over ten years and I cannot say thank you enough for sharing. Please accept my condolences and I hope you have all the support and love around you to go through this period of grief.

  432. TravelCat2 Diamond

    I am so sorry for you. Losing a loved one is tough but losing your mom is especially painful.

  433. Giles Guest

    Lovely post, Ben. I went through something very similar with my Dad, and the memories came rushing back reading this, and so did tears. Be strong, and the great memories will carry you through and will last a lifetime

  434. Eduardo_br Diamond

    I’m so sorry for you loss, Ben. You truly are a one of a kind person amongst all the savageness that the internet has become. I wish you and your family the best and lots of strength to overcome this very difficult time.

  435. Ghili Guest

    Beautiful words and photos. Thanks for sharing and our thoughts are with you.

  436. GroeneMichel Gold

    My condolences to you and your loved ones, Ben.

  437. Lori Guest

    I send deepest condolences to you and your family. It's wonderful you were able to spend so much time with her, though I understand so much is not ever enough. I'm sure she was so proud of you and the person you have become. I used some of the posts you shared about your travels with her to plan some of my own travels. Thank you for sharing so much with us.

  438. Justin Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss Ben. Thank you for sharing with us, it was a great read.

  439. Weymar Osborne Diamond

    Ben, I'm so sorry to hear of your mother's passing. I want to convey to you that her legacy reaches far and wide through the incredible person she raised in you. I have been reading your blog for probably over a decade, and I genuinely mean this when I say that the travel experiences I have been lucky enough to experience, thanks in no small part to this site, have changed my life. I admire...

    Ben, I'm so sorry to hear of your mother's passing. I want to convey to you that her legacy reaches far and wide through the incredible person she raised in you. I have been reading your blog for probably over a decade, and I genuinely mean this when I say that the travel experiences I have been lucky enough to experience, thanks in no small part to this site, have changed my life. I admire the explorer's spirit she had and instilled in others and your shared experience of traveling the world together as parent and child are inspirational to me. I strive to do the same with my mother in her golden years.

  440. Kevinkumar Guest

    My deepest condolences to you Ben. I have been on this blog for more than 10 years and have been journeying with you.

    This has been the hardest post to read as my wife is a stage 4 colon cancer patient that has a significant spread to her lungs. My wife was also diagnosed around the same time as your mom and her character reminds me so much of my wife.

    We have a 6...

    My deepest condolences to you Ben. I have been on this blog for more than 10 years and have been journeying with you.

    This has been the hardest post to read as my wife is a stage 4 colon cancer patient that has a significant spread to her lungs. My wife was also diagnosed around the same time as your mom and her character reminds me so much of my wife.

    We have a 6 year old daughter and while my wife is going through so much, she continues to live life and life abundantly.

    God has been our comforter and pillar of strength through the darkest of nights and brightest of day and tonight we all said a prayer for you and your family. May the lord Jesus keep you and your family safe and comforted even when no one sees those tears rolling down.

  441. snic Diamond

    Condolences. It's never easy, no matter how much advance warning one has. You'll never stop thinking about her and missing her, but in time it will hurt less. And you still have the incredible gifts she has given you, and you have the great privilege of teaching your children what she taught you.

    Bon courage!

  442. Melanie Guest

    Dear Ben,
    My sincerest condolences to you and your family on your mom's passing. I pray that your cherished memories of your mom will comfort you through this very difficult time.
    Thank you for sharing your story with us.
    Warmest Aloha,
    ~ML

  443. Ethan Guest

    I’m sorry for your loss, you and your family will continue her legacy. It’s amazing you got to spend lots of quality time with her the past six years. Thinking of you and your family ❤️

  444. Ryan Guest

    Ben, my sincere condolences to you. This is hard, and will be for a bit. Time will heal it. Your mom is in a peaceful place now. May she rest in peace.

  445. curds_horrors Guest

    sorry for your lost Ben.

  446. Vincent Guest

    Lucky, I’m so incredibly sorry. I wish you and your family all the strength in the world.

  447. Damien Guest

    My heartfelt condolences Ben - your mom was clearly an incredible person and my heart goes out to you and your family at this time. This was such a beautiful post and thank you for sharing it

  448. SP Guest

    Thank you for sharing. May her beautiful soul Rest in Peace,

  449. isaac Guest

    I just lost my mom in her battle with cancer.

    Big hugs

  450. Steve Guest

    So sorry for your loss Ben. Ive been following your blog for 15 years now, it was hard reading what you wrote with the emotion level. She has gone to a better place and hopefully time will heal your loss. Thank you for letting us know, as you didnt have to, but for myself, i appreciate it, and ill pray for you.

  451. Jerry Guest

    Reading this blog for several years as a guest - My condolences to you and your family Ben. Stay strong

  452. John Smith Guest

    May her memory be a blessing.

  453. Ben Lacroix Guest

    Hi Ben, I have been a reader for the past 6 or 7 years. While I have never commented before, I wanted to take this time to send my condolences to you and your family. Thank you for sharing this.

  454. Chucky Guest

    Very sad. Rest in Peace. Beautifully written. Please know that you have the support of your many readers.

  455. Jeremy Guest

    Thanks for sharing such a vulnerable, touching, and emotional post. I’m sure like many of your frequent readers on here while we may not have met your mother, your stories and updates on her brought her to life. She sounded like an amazing woman and you sound like an amazing son. May she rest in peace.

  456. BeachBoy Guest

    Sorry for your loss. Though we don't know each other personally, I teared up reading your post because of the way you shared your story with such honesty and vulnerability. Your openness will bring a connection and maybe even comfort to those who read your blog. Sending lots of Aloha to you and your family from Hawaii.

  457. Gerald Guest

    I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Thank you for sharing. Take care!

  458. Jay Deshpande Guest

    God bless your mother. My condolences, Ben. She was blessed to have a son like you.

  459. 23H Guest

    My sincere and very deep condolences.

    Your mom was certainly proud of what you've done here, and part of what's made you a success is sharing who you are. I've enjoyed 'getting to know' your family a bit over the many years I've been reading.

    Your mom now has peace and, with time, I hope you will have it too. Please be good to yourself in the months ahead - its what she would want.

    Thinking of you.

  460. NCtravel Guest

    Ben,

    Long time reader. Thinking of you and your family and glad you were able to spend so much quality time with your mom over the last 6 years.

  461. David Ourisman Guest

    Ben, I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you, your dad, and your whole family.

    David

  462. STEFFL Diamond

    Has been Highs & Lows, in recent years she was a fighter, more than ever, hearing from all your posts. But the happy moments will stay in your minds forever and if you should forget, look at the smile on Boys smile, then you know, the fun and good moments always remain in the minds.
    My condolences Ben & Family.
    We all have 1 Mom and just as a little viral hug to...

    Has been Highs & Lows, in recent years she was a fighter, more than ever, hearing from all your posts. But the happy moments will stay in your minds forever and if you should forget, look at the smile on Boys smile, then you know, the fun and good moments always remain in the minds.
    My condolences Ben & Family.
    We all have 1 Mom and just as a little viral hug to you, i think of a memory lines my mom was once writing into my Poesiealbum, was brutal at the time for me, but right as it's the natural way.
    "Unter Linden, unter Buchen, wirst Du einst die Mutter suchen und doch nirgends wird Sie sein, ausser unterm Grabestein."
    Die Erinnerungen werden immer bleiben und Sie hat den Kampf mit einer Krankheit ueberstanden, wenn auch nicht als Gewinner.
    All the needed strenght to you now and remember, YOUR life continues and there is now a generation that relies on you, those who called her Grandma.
    I think, all those who read your posts frequently, will remember some of her "stories", that you covered often.
    All the best to you all at the sad times right now.

  463. JP Guest

    Really beautiful piece, so sorry for your loss.

  464. Daniel B. Guest

    I have been your reader for many many years. I prayed for your mom every time you reported on her here. Please accept my deepest sympathy.
    You were an amazing son to her (and still are to your father).

  465. Jk Guest

    May your mother rest in peace Ben

  466. LongtimeLurker Guest

    Ben - My deepest sympathies to you and your family. The reason I value your travel/point/miles/ thought leadership above all others is because for my decade-plus as a reader, you've come across as earnest, trustworthy, kind, and all-around likable. There's no doubt after reading this beautiful tribute that such values were instilled in you by your incredible mom.

    I'm glad you were able to create such rich memories with her the past six years, in...

    Ben - My deepest sympathies to you and your family. The reason I value your travel/point/miles/ thought leadership above all others is because for my decade-plus as a reader, you've come across as earnest, trustworthy, kind, and all-around likable. There's no doubt after reading this beautiful tribute that such values were instilled in you by your incredible mom.

    I'm glad you were able to create such rich memories with her the past six years, in spite of all the hardships and sacrifices along the way.

    While I know it wasn't your intent, perhaps this heartfelt blog will give the "bEn DoEsN't PoSt MaNy TrIp ReViEwS" crowd a moment of pause and reflection, and realization that the internet doesn't just exist for their consumption and instant gratification. AI aside, behind the words and pictures are actual humans who live, breathe, and love their ailing mothers unconditionally.

  467. Warren Guest

    Ben, I am so sorry for your loss.

  468. BradStPete Diamond

    Oh Dear Ben
    I have been keeping you and your family in my prayers. I am so sorry for your loss. I know there are no words
    Please know that your OMAAT family is lifting your family up each in our own way.
    Bless you in this time of sorrow

  469. Ed Guest

    My sincerest condolences, I am so sorry for your loss. So happy that you got the time you did get and that she got to meet your second son.

  470. Andy Hicks Guest

    Truly sorry Ben. Sounds like your Mom was first class - and clearly a remarkable mother. Wishing you and your family peace.

  471. Kenneth Guest

    My condolences. May she rest in peace.

  472. Simon Guest

    So sorry for your loss. I think the photos you posted of her reflect a joyful personality. Losing a mother is so hard. Hang in there.

  473. GBOAC Diamond

    A most touching and thoughtful post. Both you and your mom are/were amazing loving caring people. Your post says just as much about you as your mom.

    My condolences on your loss.

  474. Andrew Guest

    Dear Ben and family,
    I'm happy you shared the story of your mum and brought her closer to us and also to you for a short while. Grief is just that, a time of loss and helplessness, but know that your mum, Ford, your boys and your readers are all beside you to help if you stumble

  475. JW in GA Guest

    What a beautiful tribute. All the best to you and your family during this very challenging time.

  476. Billy Guest

    Am so sorry for your loss, and thanks for sharing the story. Sending your family lots of love in this difficult time. Just know that she will always be in your memories, especially those fantastic and amazing trips that you've taken.

  477. PointsNerd Guest

    "Hopefully premium cabin award space is better in heaven than on earth"
    Your humility to bring smiles to our faces even in such pain shows just how beautiful your heart is.
    Thanks so much, Ben. Around two months from today, you'll magically notice a lot of the pain lifted. Promise.

  478. Chris Guest

    Hey Ben, I've been reading your blog since 6 years ago and have loved your personal pieces -- seeing you grow your family, spending time with your partner, and how you care for your parents. I'm so sorry for your loss; you're right, your mom is in a place where she doesn't have to feel pain anymore. Please take care of yourself during the meantime and please share more stories about your mom if it helps you grieve.

  479. Gaurav Guest

    Sorry for your loss Ben. I am glad you got it out early in this post (so important for you personally when you have this medium) and thank you for sharing your personal life with us here.

  480. C. Weston Guest

    Deepest Condolences.

  481. Jake Guest

    I am really saddened to read this Ben. Cancer is such a terrible disease.

  482. Mike O. Guest

    From the words of someone who has gone through tragedy, “There will come a day, I promise you, when the thought of your mom, brings a smile to your lips before it brings a tear to your eye. It will happen. My prayer for you is that day will come sooner than later.”

    Once again, a heartfelt thank you for sharing your family moments with us.

  483. JayCee Guest

    So sorry for your loss Ben

  484. DKB Guest

    Thinking of you all. Your Mum was a good woman to have raised someone like you.

  485. stogieguy7 Diamond

    My sincerest condolences to you and your family. And thank you for sharing your mother's story with us. She was a very lovely lady whom I'm sure was very charming as well. While it's such a difficult day for your and your family, your comments imply that you're handling this news in the healthiest way possible. Stay strong.

  486. Lucy T Guest

    So incredibly sorry for your loss. Thanks to you sharing stories over the years it felt like I knew your mom. This post is a lovely tribute to her. I’m sure she was so proud of you.

  487. Jeff Guest

    So sorry to hear the sad news. It's always hard to lose a parent. I hope your good memories bring you some comfort.

  488. DiogenesTheCynic Member

    Thank you for writing this deeply personal, no doubt really difficult piece. I've been reading this blog for just over 10 years (since the Rolling Stone article), and undoubtedly one of my favorite elements of it has been your stories about going special places with your mom and your dad. You have been a remarkable model for how to give back to, love, and show appreciation for what your parents have given you. (As an...

    Thank you for writing this deeply personal, no doubt really difficult piece. I've been reading this blog for just over 10 years (since the Rolling Stone article), and undoubtedly one of my favorite elements of it has been your stories about going special places with your mom and your dad. You have been a remarkable model for how to give back to, love, and show appreciation for what your parents have given you. (As an aside, within the first year of reading this blog, my first great use of miles I earned was being able to quickly shift around international travel to go be with a relative during a health crisis. Ultimately, that's what it's all about.) Thanks again, Ben.

  489. Andy Luten Guest

    Blessings to you and your family Ben, what a beautiful tribute.

  490. Dusty Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss Ben, that's heartbreaking. I'm glad you ended up getting so much extra time with her, and that she was able to meet and play with Miles and Jet.

  491. This comes to mind Guest

    Sad to hear this. I send my best.

  492. daftboy Guest

    What a heartfelt tribute, I’m sure I’m not the only one reading with tears in my eyes - you’re a credit to a loving mother, and I’m happy for you that you were able to have such wonderful memories together the past few years - life truly is short!

  493. Jeff Guest

    So incredibly sorry for your loss. She sounds like an amazing person. Thank you for being open and sharing with us. May she rest in peace.

  494. Sean Patrick Guest

    I’m sorry for your loss. May her memory be eternal.

  495. Jonathan Guest

    You are such a good writer Ben, your Mum was clearly an amazing lady who was very proud of you. All the best for the future.

  496. Matt R. Guest

    Ben, I've been reading your blog for well over a decade and one of the things that makes it so much better than all of the others is the human element that you infuse it with. I'm so sorry for your loss, but how wonderful that you've documented and shared so much of your time with her here, where she will live on forever. May her memory be a blessing....

  497. Maryland Guest

    Remember her light and strength to weigh against your grief. Tears and virtual hugs.

  498. InternationalTraveler Diamond

    Dear Ben, I feel for your loss. My mother passed away after being confined to a nursing home for four years. Unfortunately she was never able to go on any trips after being ill. Please be grateful of all the quality time you were able to spend with your mom. Be assured that the fond memories of her will never fade !

  499. IPR Guest

    Very sorry to hear that news Ben - your mum sounds like an incredible person and no amount of extra time is ever enough. Tough days ahead but your memories and your family will get you through them. I’ve been a regular reader for a long time without commenting, but wanted to offer my condolences.

  500. Basil Guest

    Ben - we have only met once - at Chicago Seminars 2015 - but I've been reading your blog forever. I lost my mom in 2009 and I miss her every day. It sounds like your mom was as wonderful as mine was. Know this - the memories you have of her will keep her alive and be sure that she is watching everything now from above, and she has no pain. Be grateful that...

    Ben - we have only met once - at Chicago Seminars 2015 - but I've been reading your blog forever. I lost my mom in 2009 and I miss her every day. It sounds like your mom was as wonderful as mine was. Know this - the memories you have of her will keep her alive and be sure that she is watching everything now from above, and she has no pain. Be grateful that both your kids got to meet her. Our youngest never got to meet his Yia Yia and even at age 14 he tears up when he mentions it.

  501. Malc Diamond

    Sorry for your loss, Ben. She sounds like an amazing woman.

  502. rebel Diamond

    Sounds like a lovely lady. So sorry for your loss. Condolences.

  503. Yafi Guest

    Ben, I am incredibly sorry for your loss. Your post today is beautiful and mocing and your mom is smiling in heaven reading it and seeing the impact your story has had on your community of readers. Today was the first time in my life I cried from reading something. I haven't missed a post on your blog since I was 14 for about 11 years. It has changed my life in so many ways....

    Ben, I am incredibly sorry for your loss. Your post today is beautiful and mocing and your mom is smiling in heaven reading it and seeing the impact your story has had on your community of readers. Today was the first time in my life I cried from reading something. I haven't missed a post on your blog since I was 14 for about 11 years. It has changed my life in so many ways. Even though I have never met you, you have had an enormous impact on me, and I see you as a friend. You and your family will be in my prayers, and wishing you all strength.

    "Grief is one of the biggest mountains you’ll ever have to climb.
    Not least, because it’s one that you absolutely won’t want to.
    And people may talk of ‘getting over it’.
    But the truth is,
    I don’t think we ever do.
    And that’s not to say that we don’t end up on the other side of the mountain. I’m not saying that we’re stuck in one place forever.
    But, rather than getting over it…
    Perhaps we find a cave we can walk through which brings us out on the other side. It may be dark and dim and difficult, but we make it through into the light.
    Perhaps we find a path around the mountain that leads to the other side. It may take a long time and it might be unsteady and precarious, but we make it round.
    Or perhaps we just slowly edge our way past. A little up, a little through, a little round. Step by step.
    No, I don’t think we get over it. It is too big, too overwhelming.
    Too insurmountable.
    So instead we get through it.
    Round it.
    Or quite possibly, we just get by.”
    ~ Words by Becky Hemsley

  504. Matthew Shea Hillwig Guest

    May she rest in peace and watch over you and your family. So sorry for your loss.

  505. Tim Guest

    A beautiful tribute to a remarkable woman. Love and light to you and yours Ben, and may your mama rest in peace x

  506. Patrick Guest

    "I really don’t think I could’ve reasonably done more to make the most of our time. So there’s a joy in knowing that I did my best, and that I’m so blessed to have been able to say goodbye in this way,"
    That pretty much sums it up. Did you best! No regrets.

  507. Anthony Guest

    Ben, thanks for sharing your mother's journey. I have been following your posts over the past years and you did what you thought was best for your mother and family. Thankfully she is now at peace and you have all those wonderful memories of times spent with your mother. Condolences to you and your family.

  508. vespagirl Guest

    My condolences Ben. Your mom's love will continue, and will help you through all obstacles in life, as well to appreciate and love your own family.

  509. Andy Guest

    Thank you for sharing. I could feel your raw emotion while reading each word. Being a caregiver for someone with terminal illness and taking care of your spouse and kids is almost impossible, but you made it. Best wishes.

  510. Bob Guest

    Thank you for sharing your story. I am saving a prayer for you and mom, and please accept my condolences.

  511. Sean Guest

    Ben, I’ve been a reader since the earliest days, but I seldom comment. We are about the same age.

    Please know that a stranger’s heart aches for your loss. May you find comfort and joy knowing that you showed up for your mom in all the important ways. Much love to you and your family.

  512. JohnOnOahu Guest

    So sorry for your loss. I am so glad that she got to meet your kids and just as importantly they'll have picture to remind them of her...even if they dont remember her due to such young ages. (I met my great grandmother as an infant, so don't remember her at all...but I've got pictures of her holding me.)

  513. Luis Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss, Ben. May she rest in peace.

  514. Daniel Guest

    You are a brilliant writer. But also a better son. My deepest condolences on your loss.

  515. GJ Guest

    Ben, thank you for sharing this beautiful post. My condolences to you and your loved ones over the loss of a remarkable person.

  516. skimegheath Diamond

    Condolences for your loss. Sounds like you had a wonderful relationship with her.

    As someone who has lost several immediate family members, it is very OK to be sad whilst still relived that their pain has gone.

    Wishing you all well.

  517. R W Guest

    Moege Ihre Mutter in Frieden ruhen.
    Ich erinnere mich an den Tag, for 6 Jahren, als ich den Post mit der Diagnose las. Sie haben alles so richtig gemacht. Nehmen Sie sich jetzt such Zeit zur Erinnerung an sie. Diese Tage jetzt, mit Erinnerungen und Dankbarkeit und Trauer,sind wertvoll.
    Danke fuer viele Jahre des Lesens.

  518. Florida Sunshine Guest

    Ben,
    I’m so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to your entire family.

  519. Sidd Guest

    I've been reading OMAAT for over ten years (started in elementary, I'm in college now). My deepest condolences Ben, I'm sorry for your loss.

  520. Jack Guest

    Thank you for sharing, Ben. I'm sorry for your loss. Your mother was lucky to have you as a son.

  521. James K. Guest

    When everything is in the books,
    and all is done and said
    The words that cruelly haunt a man
    are "Shoulda done ___ instead"

    It sounds like your mother lived a good life and you did everything you needed to do in order to appreciate and love her in the time you had. Remember that

  522. 101 Guest

    So sorry for your less Ben, thanks for sharing

  523. Flying Buccaneer Guest

    Ben, I am so sorry to hear about your mom's passing. Anyone who visits OMAAT with any frequency knows how important family is to you, and anyone who has ever lost a parent understands the impact your loss is having on you. Your tribute to her shows how much she meant to you and shaped the man you are.

    I went through a similar loss nearly 30 years ago when my mother was diagnosed with...

    Ben, I am so sorry to hear about your mom's passing. Anyone who visits OMAAT with any frequency knows how important family is to you, and anyone who has ever lost a parent understands the impact your loss is having on you. Your tribute to her shows how much she meant to you and shaped the man you are.

    I went through a similar loss nearly 30 years ago when my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer. Unfortunately, she died 11 months after the diagnosis, but I made the most of those 11 months, visiting her as often as I could. After about five months of treatment, the cancer moved to her liver, and she was told it was terminal. After that diagnosis, I flew from Tampa to Birmingham or Atlanta every weekend to visit her. One weekend about a month before the end, she told me how bad she felt about the physical, emotional, and financial impact her illness was having on me. I looked at her and told her not to worry about that because I was doing what I wanted to do, and besides, I was going to be able to take some great trips with the frequent flyer miles I was accumulating. That was one of the last laughs we shared. I have never regretted spending that time with her, and I know the time you spent with your mom over the past six years created many special memories for you, Ford, and your kids.

    As a fellow Tampeño who has never met you (but corresponded with you a bit years ago on FlyerTalk), I know what you are feeling right now. We all process grief differently, but one thing I can tell you is that your mom will always be with you. She will be there with you in your thoughts, dreams, and actions.

    I'm sending positive thoughts your way and know that your memories of your mom will bring you comfort, smiles, and laughter for the rest of your life.

  524. JD Guest

    May her memory be a blessing, Ben! This post puts such a perspective on life.

  525. JimmyJau Guest

    Sending you so much love and big hugs Ben. Your words are beautiful. The sentiment of love, kindness, generosity and just do it is exactly what the world needs to be doing now.

  526. Ethan Guest

    My condolences. Very sorry for you loss.

  527. NI Guest

    Anyone would be blessed to have a son like you. You made the most of an impossible situation. Condolences.

  528. Nikita Guest

    So sorry for your loss.

  529. iolaire Guest

    Sorry for your loss.

  530. Kerry Diamond

    Ben, thank you so much for sharing such a beautiful, forthright piece, and I am so sorry for your loss. Your mother sounds like she was an amazing woman, and you have really done her proud. May her memory be a blessing.

  531. Travellinewyorker Guest

    I’m so heartbroken to read this beautifully written post. Take comfort in knowing how much joy and pride you have given your mother over the years, knowing she has raised such a wonderful son.

  532. Kieran Hogan Guest

    Sincere condolences on the passing of your mother. She was very fortunate to have had such a caring and attentive son, and you were equally fortunate to have had such a devoted mother. May she rest in peace.

  533. Matt Guest

    I love your comments and I'm so sorry for you and your family. Loss is real no matter how prepared we think we are.
    And I'll most certainly second your statement to take that trip. Listen to those little promptings that you get to go visit someone or to travel somewhere with someone, listen and act on those promptings. Too often we rationalize our way out of these thoughts, just follow those thoughts and...

    I love your comments and I'm so sorry for you and your family. Loss is real no matter how prepared we think we are.
    And I'll most certainly second your statement to take that trip. Listen to those little promptings that you get to go visit someone or to travel somewhere with someone, listen and act on those promptings. Too often we rationalize our way out of these thoughts, just follow those thoughts and do.

    My mother's parents were both born in Italy and immigrated to the US when they were young. I'd guess that for at least the past 45 years I've dreamed of going to see where they lived, to have my mother show me those places. But I never did anything about it. Years passed and my grandparents passed away, without me asking them about their immigration, what it was like as a 9 year old to enter the US through Ellis Island, to acclimate to a new culture and 'home'. Next week I'm finally going to take that trip, with my mom. The timing isn't great and the money outlay is logically more than I can afford right now. But my mom is 81, a stage 4 colon cancer and stage 1 breast cancer survivor, and I don't want to risk her not being able to make a trip like this. If I wait until I'm comfortable with the cost or the availability of time or the freedom from kids at home then I might miss out on this trip of a lifetime. So I completely agree with you comment, take the trip, share time with loved ones.

    As far as cancer goes I love sharing my mom's story. Miralces can happen, and just as you got 6 years longer than you may have expected so have I. My mom's colon cancer (missed in a colonoscopy just the year before her diagnosis) had spread to lymph nodes and her liver. She was healthy enough that a major surgery removed a lot; a section of her small intestine, 1/3 of her liver, a dozen lymph nodes, gall bladder. Chemo was hard on her but she kept a happy face. She started knitting wool socks for other sufferers and still does that 13 years later. Miracles can happen and I really believe the mind and spirit can help make those miracles happen.

    But, losing someone is incredibly hard. My dad had Parkinsons and we convinced my parents to build a single floor home. The foundation was in and framing was just starting when my dad fell on the stairs in their home, hit his head, and had a major brain bleed. He was responsive and could talk but quickly declined and just over a week later he passed away. We were not ready for this but, like you, we were glad his suffering had ended. About a year before he passed he told me he didn't like that his mind said he could do things that his body then struggled to do. There are still days, 5 years later, that I still shake my head and, with tears, say he should still be here.

    Loss is hard, I wish you peace as you heal. Cherish the memories and look for ways to make new memories with your loved ones. Thank you for writing this post; travel is fun but family really is what matters most.

  534. Hillshum Guest

    My condolences, Ben. Your mom sounds like she was just wonderful. Thanks for sharing parts of your life with us.

  535. ny110010001 Guest

    My condolences, Ben. Very sorry for your loss. Your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

  536. Andy Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace.

  537. Jon Guest

    May her memory be a blessing.

  538. Summer Hull Guest

    Ben, your mom is an absolute, forever memorable gem. Thank you for sharing her (and your) story, and I'm so very, very sorry for your loss. You certainly took every trip with her. Made the most of the moments. And I hope those memories are an absolute blessing for your whole family in the days, weeks and years to come.

  539. Connor Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss Ben. She must still be very proud of you.

  540. Ben S Guest

    So sorry for your loss Ben. Really appreciate you sharing.

  541. Terry H Guest

    Very lovely tribute to your mom. My deepest sympathy to you and your family on your loss.

  542. UncleRonnie Diamond

    My condolences to you and your family, Ben.

  543. Captain Ron Member

    My deepest condolences. I have a "free" weekend later this month, and your story about the importance of family clinched it for me- it's time to go see mom.

  544. KyleEXP Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss, Ben. Thinking of you and your family with my warmest condolences. Thank you for sharing her story with us.

  545. Suman Guest

    Ben, I am a long time reader. My deepest condolences to you and Ford. This was a beautiful tribute to your mother.

  546. JonLom Guest

    I'm so sorry Ben. Losing a mom is unbelievably tough. If there is one thing that can get you through this, the thing you can truly put your back up against, is that you have built and earned so much to live for. The love your mom gave you, the start she gave you, the stability... It allowed you to build a beautiful and successful life. You're a great example of success, because you're successful...

    I'm so sorry Ben. Losing a mom is unbelievably tough. If there is one thing that can get you through this, the thing you can truly put your back up against, is that you have built and earned so much to live for. The love your mom gave you, the start she gave you, the stability... It allowed you to build a beautiful and successful life. You're a great example of success, because you're successful in all the ways that actually matter. Also, If it's any consolation, when I see a pic of you and your partner I get jealous of how unbelievably attractive he is. I'm not a jealous person so that says something. The next time you snuggle up next to him know that at least one person thinks you're incredibly lucky. I wish you the best, Ben and I'm sorry this happened.

  547. Observer Guest

    Beautiful post, Ben. Thinking of you and your family.

    Also - don’t be hard on yourself. You made the right decisions in the moment. Following your heart will never steer your wrong.

  548. Tim Guest

    What a nice tribute. Thank you for sharing your family's story. May her memory be a blessing to each of you.

  549. Eugene Guest

    Thank you so much for sharing your mother's life with us, Ben. We should all strive to live like she did.

  550. Jamie SF Guest

    Sending love, peace and healing to your family.

  551. George N Romey Guest

    I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Take heart in the fact she had a very good life and became the person she always wanted to be. Not everyone could say that at their end.

  552. brianna hoffner Diamond

    So sorry for your loss <3
    May her memory be a blessing

  553. Megan Guest

    Oh Ben… May her memory be a blessing.

  554. Antony Guest

    Deepest condolences to you. She sounds like a lovely woman.

    Thank you so much for what you do everyday Ben.

  555. Chris Guest

    Sincere condolences from Vancouver to you, Ford, and your father, and the others in your mother’s life. Your mother loved and was much loved.

    I am very sorry to hear of her passing.

  556. DinMT Guest

    Thank you for telling her story here. You are a remarkable individual and that is part of the legacy that she has created. My condolences to you and your family.

  557. SF Guest

    Ben — so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and your family.

  558. YVRtraveler Guest

    My condolences to you and your family, Ben

  559. Aaron Guest

    May she Rest in Peace.

  560. Andrew Guest

    Beautiful. So sorry for your loss. Love the pictures.

  561. NovemberWhiskey Guest

    My condolences, Ben. You clearly had a great mom, and you both should be commended for prioritizing time with each other. The pain will always be there, but even more so will be that love.

  562. Rick Guest

    Hey Ben,

    I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my mom two years ago almost to the day and I can relate to how you must be feeling. There's of course not an easier or harder way to have this happen, but mine was totally unexpected. I'm so glad you had those years with her, all those memories and meeting your kids. I have to admit, I'm pretty jealous of that. This...

    Hey Ben,

    I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my mom two years ago almost to the day and I can relate to how you must be feeling. There's of course not an easier or harder way to have this happen, but mine was totally unexpected. I'm so glad you had those years with her, all those memories and meeting your kids. I have to admit, I'm pretty jealous of that. This post is a wonderful tribute to her and I know she must be proud of who you are. It's funny how similar families can be, your pic of playing Rummikub with her brought me back to lots of games with my mom. Anyways, I hope you and the family are doing as well as can be expected. Take your time to let yourself feel crappy in the times to come, it's not a failure, but just your body adjusting to a world that feels different. I'm not sure what your situation is regarding settling affairs and the procedural elements for this process, but that can be really painful as well. Both for logistical and emotional reasons. Again, be gracious to yourself and seek help when you're feeling overwhelmed.

  563. Geo@YQB Guest

    I've been reading the blog since 2015...things like this make you realize how fast life goes by. One of the best obituaries ive read in a ling time. Thanks for sharing, your mom would be proud.

  564. Kevin Guest

    Beautiful memory, Ben. And as someone who has been reading you since back in '08 (I checked and we have emails from mid-08!), I always appreciated your growth and compassion in addition to your travel content. Wish you and your family the best.

  565. JetSetFly Guest

    My condolences. May she RIP. Take care of yourself.

  566. Chris Guest

    Ben, may your mother’s memory be a blessing. And you are a very good son. Take care.

  567. Willem Guest

    I’m glad you two had so much time together after the initial diagnosis, that’s what I always think of when it comes to my Dad who was in a similar situation

  568. jjmpdx Guest

    I’m awfully sorry. Losing your mom is an awful thing. Your readers are holding you in their thoughts

  569. FrozenKiwi Guest

    Ben, thank you for sharing about your mum and her journey. Sitting here on a plane, over the Grand Canyon, wiping away a few tears after reading that. Sending you all the courage to be okay not being okay and to continue healing. I work at a children’s hospital and we like to explain grief as a button inside of an emotional box of this loss. At the beginning, the box is really small and...

    Ben, thank you for sharing about your mum and her journey. Sitting here on a plane, over the Grand Canyon, wiping away a few tears after reading that. Sending you all the courage to be okay not being okay and to continue healing. I work at a children’s hospital and we like to explain grief as a button inside of an emotional box of this loss. At the beginning, the box is really small and you’re constantly bumping into that button. As time goes on the box will grow and there will be more space for you to just be. Yes, you will bump into the button, it’s always there, but with time you have more room to sit without the heavy grief being hit as often.

  570. Jack Guest

    Sorry for your loss Ben. Sounds like she was a great person. Love your travel contents but love this post more.

  571. Eric Guest

    My condolences, Ben. Thank you for telling your story.

  572. David Guest

    The loss of a parent is never easy and one cannot prepare whether they were 50 or 100 or you had several years or no time to prepare. I lost my mother to cancer and the time we had was so much less than we had hoped. I too was fortunate enough to take her on a few trips abroad to see the things she learned about while growing up and I cherish those memories...

    The loss of a parent is never easy and one cannot prepare whether they were 50 or 100 or you had several years or no time to prepare. I lost my mother to cancer and the time we had was so much less than we had hoped. I too was fortunate enough to take her on a few trips abroad to see the things she learned about while growing up and I cherish those memories to this day. I also was able to adjust my thinking on time spent with my father afterward as a result of the experience - you will cherish those moments as they happen all the more.

    The immediate days will be raw. Time will lessen the immediacy, but there is seldom a day I do not think of either (or both) of my parents. We all make choices, but being present when both my parents passed while difficult, brought a type of closure that perhaps eased their passing better, at least over time.

    I wish you and your family peaceful days ahead.

  573. Todd Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts go out to you and your family.

  574. Emma Guest

    Thank you for sharing such a wonderful tribute to your mom. It seems as if you were both very lucky to have each other. Sending you positive thoughts as you move through this process.

  575. michael v pat Guest

    Im so sorry for your loss - i took care of my parents fulltime for 7 yrs - i had my apartment in manhattan but stayed with them fulltime in brooklyn - i didnt want to be apart from them for one minute and they needed increasingly more help ie bathing, medications, shots, drs appts, etc - watching them suffer and die is traumatic(as you noted) - my mom also had terminal restlessness for months...

    Im so sorry for your loss - i took care of my parents fulltime for 7 yrs - i had my apartment in manhattan but stayed with them fulltime in brooklyn - i didnt want to be apart from them for one minute and they needed increasingly more help ie bathing, medications, shots, drs appts, etc - watching them suffer and die is traumatic(as you noted) - my mom also had terminal restlessness for months and i stayed up all night with her and it was awful - yes they are out of pain but now we get to miss and grieve them which has been the most painful part of my life - i always knew my parents were in brooklyn and i could hop on the subway and be there eating moms home made manicotti etc - they were both from italy.....oddly enough, i worked in route planning in the airline industry yrs ago and was fascinated with travel ever since i was a child travelling with mom to rome italy to see her parents.......my moms death caused a sudden shift in my mental and physical health - went from multiple marathon running to barely walking for the last 2 yrs but slowly getting myself better...take good care of yourself - its a journey ie grief and it does change and get better but never leaves you.

  576. LeafBeard Guest

    This is the most beautiful tribute, Ben. I am so very sorry for your loss.

  577. Donna Diamond

    My heart is breaking for you and your beautiful family. She was an amazing woman. My deepest condolences.

  578. Justin Guest

    Thank you for such a beautiful and heartbreaking tribute to your mom, wishing you and your family peace and comfort during this tough time.

  579. LauraPDX Guest

    Ben, you did everything right but it still sucks.
    I am very sorry for the loss of your Mother and I hope your Dad is doing ok.
    Ethereal hugs,
    LauraPDX

  580. Rachel Guest

    My condolences to you and your family. I have been reading your blog for about 10 years and have always appreciated the personal spin you add. The trips with your mum (and dad) were always lovely to read and clearly something very special. May she rest in peace.

  581. Eitan Guest

    Ben - So sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing this personal post. It really put things in perspective.

  582. Keith Guest

    My heart goes out to you Ben. What a wonderful mom you had. Thinking of you with gratitude for making our lives better with this excellent travel blog.

  583. bitterproffit Guest

    My condolences. What a beautiful tribute. Today is the 32 anniversary of my mother's passing. She also fought a long battle with cancer, and your story resonated with me because of the similarities. I was so happy you were able to spend as much time as you did (something I was unable to do). You will mourn, but you should also be proud of yourself for being there for your mother these last few years....

    My condolences. What a beautiful tribute. Today is the 32 anniversary of my mother's passing. She also fought a long battle with cancer, and your story resonated with me because of the similarities. I was so happy you were able to spend as much time as you did (something I was unable to do). You will mourn, but you should also be proud of yourself for being there for your mother these last few years. It wasn't easy, and many people can't do it. You will be able to look back and say that you were able to step up when you needed to. And that will be of some comfort in the times to come.

  584. Tanvir Guest

    Sorry for your loss Ben!! Sending you all the strength and well wishes

  585. Michael Guest

    I'm so sorry Ben. I hope you take comfort in the fact that you both got to spend a lot of quality time the last few years, she got to hold her grandchildren, and that she saw you grow into a great man all these years. What you do has inspired tens of thousands of readers over the years to travel and show the world to their own families. I know I have. Mom would be proud. You and your family and in my thoughts.

  586. Bruce Guest

    My condolences on your loss, and for sharing with your community. While I never knew your mother, her memory will live on in your stories, your travels and in her grandchildren. May her memory be as a blessing.

  587. Patrick Guest

    My condolences to you and everyone!

  588. Chris Guest

    If this doesn't make everyone book a trip to see loved ones, I don't know what will. Your family is in my thoughts.

  589. beaglebro Guest

    My condolences to you and your loved ones. She sounded like an amazing person.

  590. Ni Guest

    Ben- well said on what we idolize vs what actually matters!

    I will be praying for you and your mom and your family.

    Keep being productive and adding value to the world, I’m sure your mom is proud!

  591. Paul Car New Member

    Please accpet my deepest condolences. The circle of life is filled with tears of joy and sadness. Your boys will give you plent of both!

  592. Gavin Guest

    What a beautiful post and tribute to your mother. Thank you for sharing these memories. Even from just this one post it radiates what an incredible woman she was.

  593. Fred Guest

    You're a puffter and a ponce, who bought a kid. She raised that, so no loss. Hope you get some too.

    1. Michael Guest

      There are almost 500 comments here showing kindness, respect and compassion, and then there's yours. You may want to take a good look in the mirror. Your own parents will probably die of embarrassment if they aren't already there. I'm not going to wish you anything in return, cause you aren't worth it. People with so much hate inside then to weed themselves out of the gene pool on their own.

      Ben just lost...

      There are almost 500 comments here showing kindness, respect and compassion, and then there's yours. You may want to take a good look in the mirror. Your own parents will probably die of embarrassment if they aren't already there. I'm not going to wish you anything in return, cause you aren't worth it. People with so much hate inside then to weed themselves out of the gene pool on their own.

      Ben just lost his mom. Probably the one person in the world who cared about him the most. Go be a cruel shitbag elsewhere. This is not the place or the time.

  594. VS Guest

    May the almighty let her soul rest in peace!

  595. Nunzio Guest

    Deepest condolences and warm hug from Italy in such sad time.

  596. Alonzo Diamond

    My condolences. I took an international trip with my father last year because we never truly know how much time we have left with someone.

  597. derek Guest

    So sorry to hear. Ben did the RIGHT thing to treat his mother well, at least for the last few years (and probably earlier).

    2 lessons:
    1. hip fractures can kill you. So do NOT fall. No shame in using a walker.

    2. be very wary of hospice. They don't treat you on purpose. No leeway but up to their mercy. Better is to NOT go to hospice but have the doctor follow pain...

    So sorry to hear. Ben did the RIGHT thing to treat his mother well, at least for the last few years (and probably earlier).

    2 lessons:
    1. hip fractures can kill you. So do NOT fall. No shame in using a walker.

    2. be very wary of hospice. They don't treat you on purpose. No leeway but up to their mercy. Better is to NOT go to hospice but have the doctor follow pain management similar to hospice. That way, you get the best of both worlds, not limiting health care the way hospices do.

    Thank you Ben for teaching us these 2 lessons.

  598. Sergio Guest

    My deepest condolences and thanks for sharing such a personal aspect of your life. You were very lucky to have her, and I'm sure she was very lucky to have you. As a fellow queer man, it's always heartwarming to see parents who (unlike mine) accept their children just the way they are.

    From a first-time commenter, long-time lurker from Canada

  599. PSPBOY Guest

    Ben, sorry for the loss of your mother. She was fortunate to have a great son and son in law with you and Ford.

  600. Allyson S Guest

    Thank you for sharing this deeply personal experience and reflection. Sending virtual hugs.

  601. MaxPower Diamond

    So sorry for your loss, Ben. :(

  602. Dolphin Guest

    Beautiful words Ben and sorry for your loss, may her memory be a blessing.

  603. frank Guest

    Hi Ben, my condolences. I have read your blog for over 12 years and I feel I know you a lot! Im so glad you got to spend a lot of time with her and meeting your sons and have those priceless photos and videos together. May she fly high!

  604. Scott Guest

    My sincere condolences. Your mom sounds like she was a wonderful individual. Wishing you and your family all the support through this time. Following your blog for many years has been a pleasure. I'm sure she was very proud.

  605. ZTravel Diamond

    My sincere condolences Ben. Stay strong brother!

  606. MSP_Flyer Guest

    Thank you for sharing this part of your journey with us. Condolences to you and your family as your navigate this difficult time.

  607. adam Guest

    I am so very sorry for your loss - I hope you can find some peace now as well

  608. Ajay Guest

    Sorry for your loss, Ben. Your mom is in our prayers tonight.

  609. Pete Diamond

    My deepest condolences on your loss. Thank you so much for sharing. I recently lost my dad in a more unexpected fashion and I went through the same roller coaster of emotions. But it gets better with the love and support of your family and friends.

    Can’t wait to see you back on the travel trail when you’re ready.

  610. Tania Guest

    Ben,

    I am so sorry for your loss. It touches my heart to see how many trips and now many special moments you had with her and also with your boys. Your blog is probably the reason I can travel often and visit my family in Brazil. Now that I have an elderly mom, this is even more important. I cherish every time I see her, and she can come to NY to see me.

  611. CVW Guest

    My Condolences Ben. Cherish those memories

  612. An Guest

    Ben/Lucky,

    I’m in my late 20s and I’ve been reading this blog since I was a teenager when you’d go on crazy mileage runs. I’m so sorry for your loss. I still remember the blog post where you announced that your mother had been diagnosed with cancer. I don’t know you, but If it’s any consolation, it sounds like you were really intentional with how you spent time with your mother in the last...

    Ben/Lucky,

    I’m in my late 20s and I’ve been reading this blog since I was a teenager when you’d go on crazy mileage runs. I’m so sorry for your loss. I still remember the blog post where you announced that your mother had been diagnosed with cancer. I don’t know you, but If it’s any consolation, it sounds like you were really intentional with how you spent time with your mother in the last 6 years, which I respect and admire. Sending love and strength to you and your family. Hang in there - it gets better.

    Sincerely,
    A

  613. PST_flyer Guest

    So sorry for your loss.
    What a beautiful trip report about the journey of life, and even here you've shared your thoughtful insights.
    Thank you for sharing.

  614. guisun Diamond

    I rarely engage on the comments section, but I have been reading your site multiple times a day for many many years. I was going to post something about myself and my father passing, but I feel I'm in no position to give comments, as I'm not very good at deadling with it.
    So I simply wish you my condolences and that you feel better over time.

  615. Vin Guest

    I don't know who you think you've failed and let down over the years but I promise you most, if not all, understand or will understand in time. My condolences - you sound like an amazing son and your mom is definitely someone you didn't let down in the slightest. For that, you should be proud.

  616. SteveK Guest

    I have not stopped crying reading this. God Bless you.

  617. Jeff Guest

    Ben, may her memory be a blessing. Thinking of you and your family.

  618. Jan Guest

    Thanks for this post Ben. Being in a similar situation for the last one and a half years, every part of your story resonated with me. Wishing you and your family all the best.

  619. Michael Guest

    Ben, my condolences on the loss of your mother. What a poignant and moving tribute. Even when we know the end is near, we are still somehow never ready or prepared for it. Let the many beautiful memories and experiences together comfort you in your time of grief.

  620. Emirates380clearedtolandR27R New Member

    So sorry for your Loss Ben!

  621. Peter Guest

    May your mom's memory be for a blessing. Please do not post this weekend and take all the time you need to be with your family over the coming days - we will all be here when you return.

    I will be making a donation to Tina's Wish in your mom's memory, which is a charity that funds research for the early detection of ovarian cancer. When caught early, there's a 90% survival rate,...

    May your mom's memory be for a blessing. Please do not post this weekend and take all the time you need to be with your family over the coming days - we will all be here when you return.

    I will be making a donation to Tina's Wish in your mom's memory, which is a charity that funds research for the early detection of ovarian cancer. When caught early, there's a 90% survival rate, but no early detection test exists as of yet. If any of these symptoms persist for more than two weeks: upset stomach, feeling full quickly, abdominal bloating, pelvic pain or frequent urination, those could all be signs of ovarian cancer, and please seek medical advice ASAP.

  622. Motion to Dismiss Diamond

    You are a wonderful and selfless son. I am so sorry for your loss.

  623. Vishal Guest

    Ben - Thank you for sharing, this is incredibly moving. Your love for your mom comes through all too vividly and whilst it might be little comfort, you should take pride in that you’ve done as much and more than one can in your situation.

    Your post also hit home quite personally, for me. My wife has advanced cancer and has been on a similar journey to the one you described. We are in our...

    Ben - Thank you for sharing, this is incredibly moving. Your love for your mom comes through all too vividly and whilst it might be little comfort, you should take pride in that you’ve done as much and more than one can in your situation.

    Your post also hit home quite personally, for me. My wife has advanced cancer and has been on a similar journey to the one you described. We are in our mid 30s and thanks to your blog (which I’ve now followed for ten plus years), have been fortunate enough to take trips and make memorable moments. A lot of decisions get made for you when a tragedy like cancer hits - for us, it was grappling with not having kids and so much more.

    Thanks again for sharing and doing what you do every day.

  624. Chris A Guest

    So sorry for your loss Ben, but thank you for sharing this post because it does hit home and is a good reminder to take that trip and cherish the time.

  625. CXTraveller Gold

    Ben, I am so sorry for your loss! My condolences to you and your family!

    What a wonderful tribute to your mom! We are here only for a finite amount of time and will reunite with our loved ones in eternity. God bless!

  626. John Guest

    I Lost my dad when i was 28. He never had a chance to see me married , never saw grandkids, never got to grow old with my mom. This post brought back some bad memories of the end of his life, but as you go on the bad memories fade into the background and the good memories take over.

    Never apologize for letting others down in this scenario. You didn’t let your mother down and thats all that matters.

  627. Jonathan Guest

    My deep condolences for your loss Ben. Your mother sounds like a truly amazing woman and we are all worse off now without her presence.

    Ceiling and Visibility Unlimited!

  628. Shashank Nigam Guest

    May she rest in piece. Thanks for being so open and sharing your journey Ben. Big Hugs!

  629. Teja Guest

    Deeply sorry for your loss Ben, my thoughts are with you and your family. I appreciate your sharing the story with us. These things tend to go in waves so I wish you the best as you surf them.

  630. Proximanova Diamond

    I hope this crosses 500 comments. It deserves to. Your mother was — is — a champion, and lived every second of her quickly ticking life to the fullest, overcame her pain and shared her joys. That she lived for as long as she did, enough to see two beautiful grandchildren, is a testament to her fighting spirit. I’m grateful for the way you have shared her story with the world, and may she rest...

    I hope this crosses 500 comments. It deserves to. Your mother was — is — a champion, and lived every second of her quickly ticking life to the fullest, overcame her pain and shared her joys. That she lived for as long as she did, enough to see two beautiful grandchildren, is a testament to her fighting spirit. I’m grateful for the way you have shared her story with the world, and may she rest in the peace she so dearly deserved. Your boys will one day look up at the sky and ask where their granny is, and you will tell them about the remarkable person that she was.

  631. 767-223 Guest

    I’m so sorry for your loss. My mom passed away last year and I miss her dearly. She had multiple strokes over the past 10 years but the last one did her in. Her life was never the same after the first one and she only got worse. I did find comfort in knowing that she is no longer suffering.

  632. Frog Guest

    My condolences Ben. That was a beautiful and moving post. Thanks for sharing it with us (unselfishly).

  633. Banyc New Member

    Words cannot express how sad and sorry to read about the loss of your loving mom and cherished grandma to your and Ford's sons. May her memory be a blessing.

  634. Huff Daland Guest

    As my late mother would have said to you after reading this, "Your mama raised you right."

    And as such, you carry her best traits into your family's future. May her example and memory continue be a blessing to us all.

  635. di Guest

    Beautiful post, I am so sorry for your loss.

    May her memory always be a blessing. There is nothing more gutting than something like this - but I hope you can find peace in some moments.

  636. Christian Guest

    Condolences to you and your family! Loosing a parent is one of the most difficult things life throws at us.

  637. Euro Gold

    Been a long-time reader and even participated in your chats during COVID years ago. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I am glad I took the time to read through the whole article to hear about what you had to go through these past couple of years and all that you have done for your mother. I think you have got a lot to think about, go through, and work out, but...

    Been a long-time reader and even participated in your chats during COVID years ago. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I am glad I took the time to read through the whole article to hear about what you had to go through these past couple of years and all that you have done for your mother. I think you have got a lot to think about, go through, and work out, but I will say that you have not disappointed me one bit. In fact, I think you have a lot to be proud of, not the very least in being able to balance out all that has been going on in your life. I hope you can take some time out for yourself, and once again I am sorry about your loss.

  638. Bruce Diamond

    I had tears in my eyes as I read this Ben. Those who bring us into the world, clothe us, teach us, read to us, protect us, and love us are the most precious, and their shining light is beyond what words can describe. I always like to think that the more time we spend around someone, the more of an imprint they leave on our character. As if your existence is a large tapestry...

    I had tears in my eyes as I read this Ben. Those who bring us into the world, clothe us, teach us, read to us, protect us, and love us are the most precious, and their shining light is beyond what words can describe. I always like to think that the more time we spend around someone, the more of an imprint they leave on our character. As if your existence is a large tapestry and everyone who you spend quality time with weaves threads into that tapestry. And so when they are gone all you have to do is look into the mirror and you will see them, because you will always carry a part of them with you <3

  639. JD Guest

    Oh Ben. Thank you so much for sharing your mom’s life with us. This was such a beautiful tribute to her.

  640. Harold Guest

    beautiful tribute. its a testament to your consistency that I noticed "wow only 1 article this morning and its already 11am- I hope everything is okay"

    My condolences to you and your family

  641. Ricky Guest

    Sorry about your loss Ben. Those are some beautiful pictures of your mom.

  642. Izz Guest

    Lucky, I am so sorry for your loss. Your mom’s passing, feels like a loss for us all, your larger website family. Your love for your Mom was always true and came through in many posts over the years. Your mom is a very special person, and I am sure she is in a special place in heaven now, with god watching over her.

  643. Thomas Guest

    I'm sorry for your loss, Ben

  644. Karl Guest

    So sorry to hear this. I regularly check OMAAT and appreciate the site so much. Grateful for your willingness to share this sweet tribute and hard update!

  645. Francisco C Guest

    My condolences. You are an exemplary son. Thank you for sharing this.

  646. Calvin Guest

    "The best years of my life were the years since I was diagnosed with cancer." What an incredibly profound and beautiful statement. May she rest now in God's peace, the only true "First Class" and the only one that matters.

  647. Kyle Guest

    Ben, as I cry reading this my heart goes out to you and your family. Sending you the very best.

  648. sb Guest

    Sorry for your loss and thank you for the reminders about family, life, etc. You're all in my heart.

  649. Thomas O Guest

    Thinking of you and your family, Ben. I read your blog every day and have for the last 15 years--thank you for all that you share and do.

  650. Peter A Guest

    My condolences on your loss. The days ahead will be hard but your memory of a wonderful person, in your heart forever will get you through it.

  651. Michael SEA Gold

    My deepest condolences for your immense loss. Words are a poor form to express how I and most of your readers feel today, while we only knew her through you and your travels with her that you shared, she seemed like a wonderful mother and grandmother. Please do not feel like you have let anyone down because you chose family, it was and will always be the right choice.

    In the coming days and...

    My deepest condolences for your immense loss. Words are a poor form to express how I and most of your readers feel today, while we only knew her through you and your travels with her that you shared, she seemed like a wonderful mother and grandmother. Please do not feel like you have let anyone down because you chose family, it was and will always be the right choice.

    In the coming days and weeks please continue to make the choice to be with family, we will all still be here when you return.

    -Michael SEA

  652. Iowan Guest

    Ben,
    I am deeply sorry for your loss. Cherish her memories. Love Miles and Baba with the same grace she gave you - part of her spirit will live in them through you.

  653. 305 Guest

    So sorry for your loss, Ben. What an amazing tribute and post. Thinking of you during this difficult time.

  654. Anthony Diamond

    A lot of times, we try to compartmentalize and not share personal events, losses, and feelings in "work" or "professional" settings. That's what I have generally done - and it has probably not been good for me, and I am working to change that. Sharing shows vulnerability, makes you relatable, and helps people learn about what you really care about and why you live life.

    Thanks for posting, Ben. Sorry for your loss. Looking forward...

    A lot of times, we try to compartmentalize and not share personal events, losses, and feelings in "work" or "professional" settings. That's what I have generally done - and it has probably not been good for me, and I am working to change that. Sharing shows vulnerability, makes you relatable, and helps people learn about what you really care about and why you live life.

    Thanks for posting, Ben. Sorry for your loss. Looking forward to continuing to read and to comment on this excellent blog.

  655. B L Guest

    Thank you for sharing this part of life with us. Prayers and love for you and your family.

  656. speedscu Guest

    I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my father at a young age and even now 25 years later deal with the feelings. I hope you are able to find acceptance and peace, sharing this story is the first part of that journey. I truly feel for you and your family in this time.

  657. JohnnyBoy Guest

    So sorry for your loss.
    QEPD

  658. AndrewP Guest

    Ben,

    Sorry for your loss.

    Having been through something similar I know how hard it is.

    Focus on the good times you had and best wishes to you and your family.

  659. cy Guest

    a beautiful ode to a beautiful lady.

  660. R B Guest

    Condolences!

    I also lost my Mom just 10 years ago, it was very sudden, not sure if it made it easier on me.

    Big hug

  661. Rachel Guest

    I’m so sorry to hear this. You have been a wonderful and supportive son. My condolences to you and your family.

  662. Mark Guest

    Ben and Ford, So sorry to hear about your loss. You have my sincere condolences. Thanks for sharing and for emphasizing the priorities in life.

  663. MrChu Guest

    Sorry for your loss. My sincere condolences.

  664. sunviking82 Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss. The pain eases with time, but never goes away but hold on to the happy memories and laugh. . .it's okay to laugh, she would like that. She will be with you always and let you know she is there in her own way. Prayers to your and your family.

  665. Tim Guest

    Ben, what a beautiful piece and I'm so sorry for your loss. While of course we never knew her, I can speak for all readers when I say it feels like we did after such a touching tribute. I'm certain those around you will forgive you for prioritizing her, as they would have done the same. You've inspired me to have a similar outlook on my parents, and I thank you for that. Take all the time you need to heal - we will still be here when you're ready!

  666. Todd Guest

    That was such a beautiful tribute to your mother Ben! Your posts with her over the past several years inspired me to do more trips with my Mom, who turned 81 today. We even had a few nights in Big Sur at the Alila, just like you. I'm deeply sorry for your loss, as I know how special she was to you. I know she was so proud of you and that she cherished all...

    That was such a beautiful tribute to your mother Ben! Your posts with her over the past several years inspired me to do more trips with my Mom, who turned 81 today. We even had a few nights in Big Sur at the Alila, just like you. I'm deeply sorry for your loss, as I know how special she was to you. I know she was so proud of you and that she cherished all the trips you took with her and the time spent together. Her kindness, humor and selflessness lives on with you, and that is the best legacy one can leave.

  667. Lisa Guest

    I’m so sorry to read this Ben. I have often wondered how she was doing and it was very sad to see this post this morning. She sounds like a wonderful, mother, grandmother and person. May she rest in peace.

  668. itsamoeder Member

    I dropped some tears reading this for sure (one of the) nicest and most important blog posts of yours.

    It highlights the importance of the bottomline, only thing that really matters: spending time with your loved ones.

    Rest in peace, Ben‘s mom!

  669. Calidude Guest

    A beautiful tribute for a wonderful mother. You are never prepared for a loss of a dear one, no matter how you rationalize it. I was content when my father passed because his incredible pain was over. Cancer sucks and sometimes you just want to end the pain. Your children will not have first hand memories of their grandma but this tribute, the pictures, the video clips and the stories you will tell them, will...

    A beautiful tribute for a wonderful mother. You are never prepared for a loss of a dear one, no matter how you rationalize it. I was content when my father passed because his incredible pain was over. Cancer sucks and sometimes you just want to end the pain. Your children will not have first hand memories of their grandma but this tribute, the pictures, the video clips and the stories you will tell them, will bring her spirit and her love to them. Take care of yourself and your family. And don't apologize for using your blog for sharing whatever you feel like sharing - travel related or not.

  670. Win Whitmire Guest

    When our Mom died, I told my youngest brother, "Well, with Dad gone and now Mother gone, we are "orphans". But he countered with, "Yeah, but she and Dad trained the four of us well." The Anglican community has these words of comfort, "Give rest, O Christ, to thy servant with thy saints, where sorrow and pain are no more, neither sighing, but life everlasting.

  671. Phil Guest

    Sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story.

  672. mjonis Member

    I'm literally crying as I type this. My mother passed in hospice after a long battle with colon cancer. Everything you wrote it so true. My heart goes out to you and your family. It's truly a bittersweet situation. Grieve in your own way (there's no right or wrong).

  673. Bbt Guest

    Sincere condolences. Life is not always fair. Losing a loved one is super tough. Wish you all the strength to get through these tough times.

  674. Jay Guest

    My deepest condolences to you and your family. Having gone through the same thing with my mom, I understand how difficult it was for you.

    Your mom is now in a better place

  675. Bobo Guest

    My condolences to you and your family, and thank you for sharing with us. I only met you once as part of Randy Petersen's Paris OpenSkies weekend when you were a young wide-eyed college kid I think. But your blog is a daily joy for me, and I hope sharing with us will be part of your healing.

  676. Sveaviking Guest

    I'm so sorry for your enermous loss, Ben! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. My all your beautiful memories of your mother give you strength through the next year.

  677. Aaron Guest

    Ben, sending you so much love during this difficult time. Beautiful and honest tribute to one of the most sacred bonds we have — our parents. Thank you for the extra reminder to share our love vocally, and to prioritize what truly matters in life. As you try to move forward, remember to give yourself grace. It’ll take time to find your new norm, but with a mom like you described, it sounds like she...

    Ben, sending you so much love during this difficult time. Beautiful and honest tribute to one of the most sacred bonds we have — our parents. Thank you for the extra reminder to share our love vocally, and to prioritize what truly matters in life. As you try to move forward, remember to give yourself grace. It’ll take time to find your new norm, but with a mom like you described, it sounds like she gave you all the tools to live fully for yourself and all the people you love.

  678. globetrotter Guest

    My condolences for your loss. I hope you will pass on the values and principles that your mother instilled in you to your sons. I appreciate that you used this post to encourage your readers to extend empathy to others, who are suffering as domestic and world events are spiraling out of control. It neither takes any effort nor costs anything to be kind and helpful to those in need and sufferings.

  679. Mamad Diamond

    I am very sorry for your loss Ben, my deepest condolences and sympathies to you and your loved ones. I'm happy that she cherished those precious, albeit fleeting, moments with you and your sons. I will keep you and your family in my prayers and may the Lord rest her soul.

  680. Anonymous Guest

    Incredibly sorry for your loss, Ben. You and your family are in my thoughts. While my own mother battles with remission, I’ve decided to take that trip based on your shared perspective about what’s most important in life.

  681. NSS Guest

    My condolences, and may her memory be a blessing. Thank you for this tribute. You all feel like family to me after all these years of reading your content.

  682. GoAmtrak Diamond

    I'm incredibly sorry for your loss, Ben. Your mom was clearly a wonderful human who raised wonderful humans, and I'm grateful we all get to read this super real reflection and fitting tribute. Allow the grief to come up in weird, awful, and funny ways at it often does. And take really good care of yourself even as your role in your family never stops.

  683. Paddywags Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss, Ben. Your mom was very lucky (no pun intended) to have you for a son.

  684. Carol P Guest

    Glad you made happy memories. We lost my mother to ovarian cancer 32 years ago and my SIL 8 years ago.

  685. FDW Guest

    I’ve always loved any trips you’ve shared with your parents. They’ve always been the most interesting because they show the excitement they have for traveling and it’s a trait you share.

    So sorry for your loss but am thankful she and you had the time together.

  686. gk Guest

    Your mom will always be with your family as a protector from above.

  687. HonzaK Guest

    Thank you for sharing this very sad news, Ben. Please allow us share our deepest condolence. May she rest in peace.

  688. Frances Price Diamond

    Sitting at my computer sobbing for a woman - and her son - I've never met. You write so beautifully about your mom, Ben. I'm so sorry for your loss.

    I found your blog around 2013, when I started traveling more - after going through my own ovarian cancer surgery and treatment (blessedly caught early). That was right after my mom died from circulatory issues, after a month in hospice. And I was so grateful...

    Sitting at my computer sobbing for a woman - and her son - I've never met. You write so beautifully about your mom, Ben. I'm so sorry for your loss.

    I found your blog around 2013, when I started traveling more - after going through my own ovarian cancer surgery and treatment (blessedly caught early). That was right after my mom died from circulatory issues, after a month in hospice. And I was so grateful she wasn't around to worry about me. That is when I learned to enjoy every day as if it were your last.

  689. Sathvik Guest

    My sincere condolences Ben. I am glad your family got to enjoy so much cherished time with your mom. I think you truly beautifully encapsulated the challenges and struggles of dealing with such an unfortunate situation. I hope you and your mom have some comfort in knowing how many thousands of families across the world (including mine) got to have cherished memories at places all around the world thanks to the tips and tricks from...

    My sincere condolences Ben. I am glad your family got to enjoy so much cherished time with your mom. I think you truly beautifully encapsulated the challenges and struggles of dealing with such an unfortunate situation. I hope you and your mom have some comfort in knowing how many thousands of families across the world (including mine) got to have cherished memories at places all around the world thanks to the tips and tricks from your blog. My thoughts are with you and your family during this time ❤️❤️❤️

  690. ChrisA Guest

    Deeply sorry for your loss. Im sure your mom lived a life full of happiness and no regrets, and being there for her and making her happy were the most wonderful moments of her life

  691. Kevinled Guest

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss Ben.

  692. Art Guest

    My condolences to you and your family. May her memory be a blessing. I'm sure she cherished every moment with you.

    Mourning is super difficult and all I can offer is: give yourself permission to grieve and to take care of yourself.

  693. Nolan S Guest

    Ben, this is the most beautiful tribute to your mother. What an amazing woman. I remember first reading your blog about her diagnosis years ago, and I'm so grateful you've been able to create the memories you have with her. Thank you for this reminder of what truly matters in life. My greatest condolences and sympathy to you.

  694. MAGA Joe Guest

    Blessings to your sweet mother. Thank her for being a wonderful person who shared her son with the rest of the world. Condolences.

  695. Dc Guest

    What a beautiful post. I’ve been reading this blog since my teenage years and always loved reading the posts about your mom. She seemed wonderful.

    My sincerest condolences to you and your loved ones. Sending love.

  696. Andrew H. Guest

    My sincere condolences.

    Losing a parent is never easy.

  697. Todd Diamond

    I'm sorry for your loss, Ben. As so many of us here have lost loved ones to cancer, we know your pain and share in your grief. Thank you for sharing this with us.

  698. Kaleb_With_A_K Diamond

    Very sorry for your loss Ben.

  699. Mike Guest

    What a gracious post Ben. As always.Your mom raised a good son and she was a wonderful mother. May her spirit be blessed. Condolences.

  700. Jose Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss, Ben.

    Having had a similar experience where Parkinson's robbed my dad of all quality of life in his final years, it will be a difficult time for you, but allow yourself to feel the grief and all of the emotions that may come. Treat yourself with kindness, and know that she'll always live on in your memories.

  701. PJS678 Member

    So sorry for you and your family's loss. We lost my dad in 2020 suddenly and it's never easy. Condolences and may she rest in peace.

  702. Dror Guest

    Feeling your pain Ben, condolences.

  703. Marriott Marty Guest

    May her memory be a blessing. Sorry for your loss.

  704. Nasir Guest

    Very sad to know. My deepest condolences to you and your family. May her soul rest in peace.

  705. Marc Guest

    Her memory will always be a blessing ❤️

  706. Santastico Diamond

    So sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace and I am sure she will keep watching you and your family from up there. Keep the great memories you had with her as those nobody can take from you.

  707. LarryInNYC Diamond

    Although it's little consolation, I'm twice your age (more or less) and would be proud to be able to say I had handled an illness and death as well as you have. From the time you spent with your mother, to the memories you created with her and your children, which will be with you -- and with them, even if in the form of photographs and videos -- for the rest of your lives,...

    Although it's little consolation, I'm twice your age (more or less) and would be proud to be able to say I had handled an illness and death as well as you have. From the time you spent with your mother, to the memories you created with her and your children, which will be with you -- and with them, even if in the form of photographs and videos -- for the rest of your lives, it's hard to imagine how you (and your mother) could have been more intentional about this (inevitable) ordeal.

    You needn't spare a moment's thought for having let anyone here down as (1) you haven't and (2) any responsibility you have to readers is not measured on the same scale as the responsibility you have to your family.

    As a long-time reader I know (and appreciate) the separation you keep between your family life and your public life. However, if you feel it's not inappropriate to share, I would like to know your mother's name and also your older brother's.

  708. Jason Guest

    sincerest condolences for your loss

  709. Duck Ling Guest

    I have no idea how you can find the strength to write something so beautifully touching so soon after her passing, but thank you for sharing something so personal with us.

    I am happy she got to meet both her grandkids and that although she is no longer here, she is also no longer in pain and discomfort.

    May she rest in peace and sending you and your family hugs

  710. Matt the Coffeeman Guest

    I am sorry for your loss - it is difficult to lose a parent. Wishing you and your family peace during the mourning process.

  711. panda Gold

    Very sad to hear this. Her spirit will carry on forever.

  712. iv Member

    Thank you for sharing Ben. Sorry for your family's loss. May her memory be a blessing.

  713. Justin Guest

    My deepest condolences to you and your family. The pain and suffering is gone but now filled with a deep loss. You had an amazing life with her and the memories you both shared, both on and off the road, will be eternal. She was very lucky to have a son like you to treat in her in high esteem with your posts and also with the lavish trips (I always enjoyed reading about your...

    My deepest condolences to you and your family. The pain and suffering is gone but now filled with a deep loss. You had an amazing life with her and the memories you both shared, both on and off the road, will be eternal. She was very lucky to have a son like you to treat in her in high esteem with your posts and also with the lavish trips (I always enjoyed reading about your parents' "round" birthdays) but I imagine with the time spent doing everyday things. Cherish the time you had together and may it bring you solace and peace. All the best to you and yours.

  714. Icarus Guest

    Sending condolences a beautiful post

  715. Matt Guest

    I am sorry to read about this sad news, Ben. I read your beautiful tribute with tears in my eyes. Your mom was an amazing woman who raised a wonderful son. Please accept my condolences. You and your family are in my prayers. May your mother rest in peace

  716. Tal Guest

    Sending you and the entire family my heartfelt condolences. May your mother’s memory be a blessing .

  717. Matt Guest

    I’ve been reading this blog for over ten years. Thanks for having the courage to share. Thinking of you and your family.

  718. Samar Member

    So sorry for your loss Ben, and thank you for sharing your Mom’s story with us. She sure seemed like a great woman (as all Mom’s should be!)

  719. Steven Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss, Ben. My deepest condolences to you and your family.

  720. UnitedEF Guest

    My condolences Ben. I hope you're happy you got to say good bye for a few years I wish I had that chance. My dad passed suddenly on a business trip in Taiwan. I was on a plane that night to see him but when I got there he was already intubated and could not speak. I was able to say a few words and I saw tears from his eyes and that was it....

    My condolences Ben. I hope you're happy you got to say good bye for a few years I wish I had that chance. My dad passed suddenly on a business trip in Taiwan. I was on a plane that night to see him but when I got there he was already intubated and could not speak. I was able to say a few words and I saw tears from his eyes and that was it. He died in the OR while the surgeons tried to help him. I wish I had the time with my dad that you had with your mom. I hope you take comfort in that.

  721. Christian Guest

    Sincere condolences. Having been in a somewhat similar situation around your age I sympathize greatly. May you remember the good times and look back upon them with love and fondness.

  722. Jack H Guest

    So sorry for your loss, Ben. This is a beautiful post - wishing the best for your family.

  723. Santos Guest

    Ben, thanks for sharing this incredibly honest and brave post. Me and my family (to whom I praise your site endlessly) have you and your family in our thoughts today.

    I have been there with my own mother, although it was when I was quite young and that was many years ago. But I remember the pain clearly. Cancer sucks.

    Please continue to share your emotions and feelings openly with your family and...

    Ben, thanks for sharing this incredibly honest and brave post. Me and my family (to whom I praise your site endlessly) have you and your family in our thoughts today.

    I have been there with my own mother, although it was when I was quite young and that was many years ago. But I remember the pain clearly. Cancer sucks.

    Please continue to share your emotions and feelings openly with your family and loved ones. It is just as important for you all to take care of yourselves in this difficult time as it is to honor the wonderful memory of your mom and her life well lived.

    Hang in there. My sincere condolences.

  724. Nelson Diamond

    Hi Ben, I'm so sorry for you all! Wish you all the best. Unfortunately I have been through but it's the only certitude we have once born. Keep your head up mate!!!

  725. Aman Guest

    Sending you and the family a lot of love, Ben. I remember when you first wrote about your mom’s diagnosis and am so grateful that you were able to make these years so special for her. I am sure she is always with you and looking down at you from above.

  726. Dimabe Guest

    Thank you for telling your story. Your mom left a great legacy. You are terrific.

  727. Greg Guest

    Condolences to you and your family and her friends, you have written a wonderful tribute to someone very special

  728. Jonathan Guest

    I’m deeply saddened to hear of your loss. May her memories bring you comfort and strength.

  729. Cedric Guest

    I'm sorry for your loss, Ben. She seems like a great person and mother. My mother-in-law passed away in 2019 due to the same cancer, and it was super rough for my wife. I'm leaving in two weeks with my mom and sister for a week in Florence, primarily because my wife wants me to do what she would have liked to do with her mother. When your life is almost over, you won't remember...

    I'm sorry for your loss, Ben. She seems like a great person and mother. My mother-in-law passed away in 2019 due to the same cancer, and it was super rough for my wife. I'm leaving in two weeks with my mom and sister for a week in Florence, primarily because my wife wants me to do what she would have liked to do with her mother. When your life is almost over, you won't remember that new sofa or kitchen remodel, just the time spent with loved ones. Trips are a great way to set aside daily life and focus on the moment.

  730. Cef Guest

    Thanks for the well thought, sincere and heartfelt post. My condolences to you, and a big hug from the heart.
    I will keep you and her in my prayers.

  731. Trevor Guest

    Very sorry for your loss Ben. Thoughts are with you at this difficult time.

  732. VP Guest

    Hello Lucky,

    Have been following your blog regularly for 10+ years though have never commented before. Just wanted to post my condolences for your loss. Your touching post bought a tear to my eye. In my case, I lost my mum suddenly in an accident so didn't even get time to say good bye to her. Your mum's qualities are really admirable and so is your dedication to your passion in running this blog. Wish...

    Hello Lucky,

    Have been following your blog regularly for 10+ years though have never commented before. Just wanted to post my condolences for your loss. Your touching post bought a tear to my eye. In my case, I lost my mum suddenly in an accident so didn't even get time to say good bye to her. Your mum's qualities are really admirable and so is your dedication to your passion in running this blog. Wish you all the best for the future and I am sure you will only come out stronger from the experience.

  733. Steve K Guest

    Perhaps your best blog. Straight from the heart.
    Sorry for your loss Ben. May your Mother rest in peace, in First Class.

  734. Carol Brennan Guest

    My Thoughts and Prayers are coming ❤️ for you all! Just know she'll always be with you each & everyday watching over you! You were Blessed with a Beautiful Mom! Blessings Always ❤️

  735. Marcos Guest

    beautiful words. don't forget how lucky you were, those final years were a true blessing. Stay strong

  736. Ben Guest

    I'm sorry for your loss!

  737. Raulf Guest

    Sorry for your loss. May her RIP.

  738. Enzo Dolan Guest

    A beautiful tribute, your mum is very proud.

    I've been reading your blog on and off for the past 10 years, but I always came back to read your trips with your mum. You helped her live life to the fullest.

    God bless.

  739. BC Guest

    Beautifully written. My sincerest condolences on your loss.

  740. Richard Guest

    Ben sorry for you loss. Your mom and dad raised a fine son who blessed them with a wonderful family and terrific memories.

  741. Shark Guest

    I am so sorry for your loss, Ben.

  742. James Thalmann Guest

    Ben:

    Sorry to hear of this news today.
    Best ahead to you, Ford, and family.

    James
    Salt Lake City, Utah

  743. Mike Guest

    I'm so sorry your loss, Ben.

    1. Mike Guest

      I'm so sorry for your loss, Ben*

  744. Steve Guest

    Condolences on the passing of your mom. I also lost my mom to ovarian cancer and it was rough. It sounds like she was an amazing woman and it’s great that she was still around to meet and love on her grandkids.

  745. Lisa Guest

    What a beautiful tribute to your mom and what memories you made together! Thinking of you Ben - it’s so hard to lose a parent.

    1. Kneemuh Member

      A beautiful tribute indeed. So sorry for your loss, Ben.

  746. Ian Guest

    What a beautiful thing to read, Ben. Wishing you comfort in your grief and the loving embrace of her memory. With love from a huge community that loves you.

  747. Kenneth Massalone Guest

    What a beautiful post, I hope I can honor my mother the same way someday

  748. David Guest

    Deeply sorry for your loss. I lost my mom to cancer when I was 24. Even now, 40 years later, I still miss her. I know how you feel.

    It will get better over time, and she will always be alive in your memories.

  749. Elisabeth Guest

    so sorry for your loss
    Very well written, that can be very therapeutic and no need to apologise for that!
    I can imagine it is all very raw now, but you will learn to live with the grief. Day by day, step by step.
    Take care!

  750. Syd Guest

    Very sad to hear this, Ben. Very sorry for your loss. Can't imagine what you're going through and what it took you to write this. Stay strong! Warmest wishes to you and your family. She's smiling at you.

  751. betterbub Diamond

    What a wonderful mother she was to raise such a great son. Thank you, Mom!

  752. Kelly s Guest

    First let me say I am sorry for your loss. I have been battling ovarian cancer since 2015 and it’s been very hard. My son was 11 when I was diagnosed. I know his whole life has been impacted by the highs and lows of this disease.

    Travel has been my therapy. That’s what gets me through. My son has taken so many trips with me. Just last fall we took a trip to...

    First let me say I am sorry for your loss. I have been battling ovarian cancer since 2015 and it’s been very hard. My son was 11 when I was diagnosed. I know his whole life has been impacted by the highs and lows of this disease.

    Travel has been my therapy. That’s what gets me through. My son has taken so many trips with me. Just last fall we took a trip to London and Paris just the 2 of us. He recently graduated aviation school as a mechanic and moved away for a job. It broke my heart for him to leave when I am on the downward slide but I am proud of him for making his own way in life.

    I am sure your mom was so proud of everything you have done and was so blessed to experience all she has. Cherish those memories you have of her.

  753. DT Diamond

    Heartbreaking. So sorry for your loss.

    I’m sure she and your brother are sitting in row 1 on the Concorde with a Champagne toast!

  754. Ethan Guest

    So sorry for your loss, Ben. Know there is only love coming from this community, and thank you for sharing your story throughout what I’m sure has been (and continues to be) an emotional journey.

  755. Dan Guest

    My deepest condolences, and a wonderful tribute to a clearly wonderful woman.

  756. Mike Guest

    Can't even begin to express my sorrow for your life. Your Mom sounded like an incredible person, and it probably meant everything how hard you tried to be there for her.

  757. Daniel Mason Guest

    I am very sorry to hear Ben. Hugs to you and your family

  758. hbilbao Diamond

    @Ben, I'm truly very sorry about your mom's passing. You'll find comfort little by little. Your beautiful memories of the time she was able to spend with you and your family will guide you throughout the next chapter in your life.

  759. at Guest

    Dear Ben,

    I am so sorry to hear of this. I send you the utmost of condolences. Your mom was lucky to have a son like you, and it seems the converse was true as well.
    Take good care of yourself and your family.

  760. Nathan Guest

    I'm so sorry for your loss. Condolences to you and your family. Thank you for sharing this with us.

  761. Alvin | YTHK Diamond

    Keep well, Ben – praying for you and family.

  762. Brian Guest

    What a wonderful tribute and thank you for sharing. I’m so sorry for your loss and my sympathy to you and your family.

  763. bako Guest

    Sorry for your loss , be strong

  764. Chris Guest

    I wanted to share my deepest condolences with you. As someone who also lost a parent to cancer far too early, I deeply empathize with you. I know your mom was incredibly proud of the incredible blog you have made, and I just wanted to let you know it has had a truly life-changing impact on so many of us. I hope you take time to step back, take care of yourself, and remember your...

    I wanted to share my deepest condolences with you. As someone who also lost a parent to cancer far too early, I deeply empathize with you. I know your mom was incredibly proud of the incredible blog you have made, and I just wanted to let you know it has had a truly life-changing impact on so many of us. I hope you take time to step back, take care of yourself, and remember your mom. It will be hard, but I hope as time goes on, you will smile when you think of your mom.

  765. Chris Guest

    Ben, our condolences and thanks for sharing. Losing a loved one is difficult but glad she is now at peace.

  766. DavidW Guest

    What a beautiful tribute to a wonderful woman. As you now know, all a parent really wants is for their child(ren) to be loved, happy, healthy, and comfortable. You have done all that and more. No doubt she was proud of you.

    You will pay it forward to your boys as it should be.

    Hang in there.

    1. at Guest

      So well said, DavidW.
      Agree 500%.

  767. kay_elemeno Member

    Ben, I'm so sorry for your loss. Your love for your mom was clear in your writing and I've loved following the ways you use your points & miles and passion for travel to brighten the lives of your parents and your loved ones. I'm so sorry for your loss and I'm sending lots of warm thoughts your way.

  768. McCaron Guest

    Sorry for your loss.
    From a son's perspective, I realize that the best we have to offer to our parents is these unforgettable moments with their grandchildren.
    I recently talked to my dad and he told me that being a dad was a different role than being a grandfather.
    I hope your mom spent a happy life as your mom and an even happier end of life surrounded by her grand children.
    May she rest in peace.

  769. Northern Flyer Guest

    I’m very sorry for your loss but am heartened to see you looking for bright signs amid the sadness. My mother died at 51 of breast cancer and missed out on seeing her sons get married and becoming parents.

  770. TL Guest

    May her memory be a blessing. I am truly sorry for your loss. Sending great love to you all.

  771. JB Guest

    Ben, I am so sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace, and may your family also find comfort in the fact that you got to spend so much time with her before she left.

    It is never easy losing a parent, and in my opinion, nothing can compare to that feeling. You and your family will be in my prayers.

    1. JB Guest

      I wanted to add a few comments which I think may help you. That the feeling you have doesn't go away. Rather, you learn to just live with it. It's intensity will go down to a certain extent, and you will learn how to not let it consume you. But, at this stage, you should - and are allowed - to grieve. No matter how much of a notice or preparation you had in advance,...

      I wanted to add a few comments which I think may help you. That the feeling you have doesn't go away. Rather, you learn to just live with it. It's intensity will go down to a certain extent, and you will learn how to not let it consume you. But, at this stage, you should - and are allowed - to grieve. No matter how much of a notice or preparation you had in advance, it doesn't help with making this day (and the days that come) any better. You will still have the same initial thoughts and feelings. The days that come will be a rollercoaster. As you said, it feels like your in another life today with your mother gone, and it will continue to feel like that, likely for the rest of your life. For me, it helped to surround myself with the things that were in my old life that I loved and cherished. For you, I would recommend you spend uninterrupted time with loved ones. Ford, your kids, and any other close relatives, along with close friends. Take time over the next few days to do what you love. Savor that cup of coffee in the morning, despite the feeling that lingers. And when you inevitably break down or feel like crying, be around your loved ones to help comfort you. Crying around your kids actually might help. They may make you feel better in ways you wouldn't expect. Don't try to be all stoic for them because it likely will fail. And if your kids can sometimes (understandably) be a handful, it would likely help to have some close relatives stay with you for a bit to help take care of them (perhaps Ford's mom).

      Again, my thoughts and prayers go out to you. The good thing is that as you said, you made the most of the time you had together, and you don't think you could have done anything better. That last point will help you avoid regret, which is like digging yourself in a pit after a parent passes away. The good thing is that you can be at peace with that thought, and for me, that thought has helped me move forward as time goes on. Please, take the next few days, weeks, and months easy on yourself Ben. Remember to care for yourself.

      All the best,
      JB

  772. MP Guest

    So sorry for your loss. This was an amazing tribute to an incredible person. <3

  773. Chris Guest

    Great story, Ben, and thanks for sharing the personal angle. You have made your mother proud, I'm certain. Be well.

  774. KATA Gold

    My deepest condolences Ben, I am genuinely so sorry for your loss.

  775. Dave Guest

    Ben, I am sorry for your loss. I lost one of my parent to cancer. You know the day is coming, but it doesn’t make it any easier or make you prepare for.

  776. Up Up & Away Gold

    So sorry to read of your mom's passing Ben.

  777. Frank Guest

    You were a wonderful son. As someone who lost their mum similarly, I understand and I am so sorry for your loss.

  778. HT Guest

    Ben, I am so sorry for your loss. All of us here know how much you love her, and we're all pretty clear that she is an incredible person. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

  779. Stoppy New Member

    My condolences Ben

Featured Comments Most helpful comments ( as chosen by the OMAAT community ).

The comments on this page have not been provided, reviewed, approved or otherwise endorsed by any advertiser, and it is not an advertiser's responsibility to ensure posts and/or questions are answered.

Matt Guest

I’ve been reading this blog for over ten years. Thanks for having the courage to share. Thinking of you and your family.

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Brian G. Diamond

I remember during one of your pandemic live streams I asked your mother a question about a cruise that she had just taken recently. She gave me such a detailed answer, and really wanted to make sure my question was answered. From that single interaction I could tell she was so nice. Lucky sorry for your loss!

4
Nolan S Guest

Ben, this is the most beautiful tribute to your mother. What an amazing woman. I remember first reading your blog about her diagnosis years ago, and I'm so grateful you've been able to create the memories you have with her. Thank you for this reminder of what truly matters in life. My greatest condolences and sympathy to you.

4
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