I’ve Finally Found A City I’m Ready To Call Home… Eventually

There’s not a day where I don’t pinch myself for how lucky I am. Not only do I get to do what I love for a living, but I have virtually unlimited flexibility. I “work” a ton of hours, though being able to do so from anywhere in the world is such an incredible opportunity.

So I figured I’d recap my journey a bit until now, and then talk about how I’ve found a place where I’m finally ready to settle down… eventually… I think.

New York, Florida, Seattle…

For what it’s worth, I was born in New York, and lived there for the first several years of my life. Then then I was young we moved down to Florida, where I lived until I graduated college.

From there I made the decision to move to Seattle, after much thought… I chronicled that extensively on the blog. Seattle was a city I’ve always been captivated by, as someone who loves airplanes, nature, and coffee. And it’s a city I’d absolutely consider moving back to in the future at some point.

Seattle-3

Prior to that I had lived on the east coast all my life, and realized it really wasn’t for me. Admittedly there are many parts to the east coast, but something just felt more “right” about living on the west coast. It’s tough to explain, but as someone who has never had a “traditional” job and didn’t go to a fancy school or have a fancy job title, the west coast just felt so much more accepting. And as someone who is generally pretty tightly wound, I found the more laid back attitude on the west coast to be good for me.

Then I moved into hotels full time…

Due to a variety of factors (relationships, the fact that I was traveling about 75% of the time, etc.) I decided to move into hotels full time as of last April.

I reflect on my decision to live in hotels almost daily. Shortly before I moved into hotels I figured I’d either love it with a passion or hate it with a passion. But the truth has been somewhere in the middle… or maybe I’m just maturing.

I guess my sentiment about living in hotels can be summed up as follows:

  • Living in hotels has given me so much freedom to actually spend time with friends more than was previously possible. When I have a few days off I can fly just about anywhere and hang out, which I previously felt guilty about when having a home.
  • At the end of the day I’m truly living my dream. If I could tell 14 year old me that I’d be living in hotels and flying nonstop he’d tell me to go to hell, because that literally sounds like a dream come true.
  • But this lifestyle also takes a toll on me — mentally, physically, and in a way, socially. My recent health scare sort of reinforced that for me. Traveling constantly is awesome. Constantly being jetlagged isn’t. Having mental freedom is awesome. Living your life day-by-day and constantly moving (or maybe even “escaping”) isn’t, in many ways. Having friends all over the world is awesome. Not seeing them more than once every few months isn’t.

So I’m having a blast doing what I’m doing, but I also recognize I don’t want to be doing this in a decade. I want to have a home, and a dog, and be in a relationship. That’s what’s actually important to me, at some point.

I know where I want to move… I think

The biggest roadblock in me actually living anywhere has been trying to decide where to live. I’m an incredibly risk averse person nowadays, so typically I won’t change anything about my life unless I see a compelling reason to do so. So part of what has kept me living in hotels past the initial year has been trying to decide where I want to live. I’m not giving up this pretty awesome lifestyle to move to a city I feel lukewarm about, at best.

I’ve been to dozens and dozens of cities all over the world, including many in the US. And a lot of friends give me tips about where I should move — “you should live in New York,” or “you should live in San Francisco.” But as much as I like visiting those places, I can’t actually see myself living in either.

But I’ve found a city I really, truly, honestly love… and 90% of you will likely think I’m crazy.

Los Angeles?!?

LA is a polarizing city… people either love it or hate it, in my experience. And I do think most people simply hate it. LA has a lot working against it, not the least of which is terrible public transportation and arguably not the most “substantial” human beings in the world.

Los-Angeles

But I love Los Angeles. Why?

  • The weather. I know this is something others maybe don’t care about as much, but I’m someone who loves nice weather. I get miserable when I’m in bad weather. I can’t handle the cold. When I’m in LA I find myself saying “ugh, isn’t the weather amazing?” every five minutes. So while it might not be important to others, it’s probably the single most important thing to me in deciding where to settle down.
  • 20 cities in one. LA has terrible public transportation. But part of that is because LA is so damn spread out. That’s something which drives most people crazy, but I sort of love how it’s 20 cities in one. From Beverly Hills to Santa Monica, there are just so many “unique” areas within driving distance. And if we’re talking about trips within driving distance, you have everything from San Diego to Santa Barbara to Las Vegas to Palm Springs.
  • It’s not that expensive. Admittedly this is a relative point, because LA is still expensive. But since so many have suggested NY or SF to me, I think it’s worth pointing out that LA isn’t that expensive. San Francisco is a great city, but with the cost of living and mediocre weather, I just don’t think I’d be happy there. As far as New York goes, I love visiting it, but it’s just too busy for me. I would feel like I’d need to escape.
  • There’s something electric about LA for me. You know how some places have the “X factor,” where we feel sort of energized just be being there? LA gives me that feeling. I can’t explain why. But LA feels special to me. I can’t really explain it…
  • A lot of my best friends live in the area. I’m generally an introvert, so I’m not someone who could handle going out with friends every night. That being said, several of my very good friends live in LA (or within a couple of hours drive), so I wouldn’t be moving to a city where I don’t know anyone.

Beach

Bottom line

Am I ready to change my life tomorrow and settle down? Nope. But for the first time since living in hotels I’ve actually found a place I could see myself (happily) settling down.

Though given the flexibility of settling down anywhere in the world long term, something tells me I’ll get some flak for picking Los Angeles of all places.

Am I crazy?

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jaymanlb New Member

Ben, I work as a management consultant and travel the world 3 weeks out of each month. I live in Long Beach (20 miles south of LAX), and its heaven to me! I have been here 20+ years and its a wonderful community that is highly diverse, (white, black, asian, latino, gay, etc.) We all get along, have wonderful neighborhoods, and a real city (with a flourishing downtown, arts scene, great restaurants), and a wonderful local airport (LGB is my airport of choice if I can go there from there... I often take the AA flights to PHX and connect there just to avoid LAX), but as a traveler, being an $11 cab ride and 10 minutes from LGB, 30 minutes to either LAX or SNA, its a travelers dream! I hope to welcome you to Southern California personally!

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Jim Guest

Geeze, I was impressed with the public transportation in Los Angeles. I stayed at the Crowne Plaza in Redondo Beach. For a $6 day pass, I rode the 109 Beach City Transit to the subway, then up to Burbank for a day at Universal Studios, then back to Redondo Beach in the evening. With gas prices the way they are in SoCal, $6 was a steal.

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Hank Guest

When I got married I gave my wife a list of 5 places I didn't want to live and L.A. was on that list. Fast-forward many years and we are now living in L.A. and loving it. We have lived in 12 states, 3 countries, and L.A. comes out on top for us. People that haven't lived here don't understand the city, hell its not really a city. It is 100's of unique neighborhoods mashed together. Sure there are tons of pretentious hipsters to make fun of in WEHO and Silverlake but the working class neighborhoods far outnumber the painfully ironic. Sure traffic sucks......but its dependant on where you live in where you want to go. Live in the Southbay and you can get to LAX in 20 minutes on any given day and have the best weather in the world. While living in the Southbay why not work in Torrance, Long Beach, El Segundo, etc and never have to deal with traffic? Want to explore farther away? Traffic on Saturday and Sunday is relatively light and allows you to participate in even the most far flung event with a minimum of aggravation. Like food? There are more varieties within a 20 minute drive of ones house than offered in other cities as a whole (and they are dirt cheap). L.A. is a popular target that is often trashed by people that have never lived here. Its not a city for tourists for sure, its too spread out, but its a great city to live in for the right person.

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Ali Guest

As a native Angelino who has lived in the South and Midwest, I understand the the need for consistent tolerable weather. Hope to welcome you to the city soon.

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calwatch Guest

For a traveler the one reason I would pick San Diego over LA is how close SAN is from downtown, and how many condos downtown and in Mission Valley are still (more) reasonably priced thanks to the bubble. You can walk from downtown to the airport, and quite a few people do. That's not possible with LAX.

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Meet Ben Schlappig, OMAAT Founder
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