I love Global Entry. It’s rare anything “eventful” happens, and while this probably isn’t eventful either, it made me laugh.
Yesterday I was clearing immigration at a major US airport (which is all I’ll say to protect the identity of all involved). Both British Airways and Virgin Atlantic landed just before us, so the immigration hall looked like the queue for a One Direction concert.
Anyway, at this airport the crew lane is literally blocking the Global Entry kiosks, to the point that if there’s someone in the crew lane then it’s almost tough to sneak by and use one of the kiosks. Both the Virgin Atlantic and British Airways crews were queuing for immigration, so there must have been 40 of them lined up.
I seemed to be the only one using Global Entry, so I politely said “excuse me” as I tried to cut them to get to the kiosk, and one of the British Airways stews jokingly responded “and who do you think you are?” The British Airways crew was screwing around with the Global Entry kiosks pushing buttons and saying “we should be able to use these.”
So when I walked up to the kiosks one of the British Airways stews (interestingly enough the one wearing a Santa hat and flashing lights) said “oh look, we get a live demonstration, can you show us how to use these?” So they all gathered around the kiosk and I walked them through all the steps (“this is the page where you try to convince them you’re not a drug smuggler or money launderer,” etc.).
I guess what we had failed to consider when they “gathered around” to watch a “demonstration” was that we’d all appear in the picture. So I get the print out, and go figure it’s me and three crew members, including the one wearing a Santa hat and flashing lights.
When I go to customs the officer looks at my printout and says “what the heck happened?” I couldn’t tell whether she found it hilarious or was pissed… probably somewhere inbetween.
Anyway, that was a first for me. Yeah, I know, cool story, bro (below video is NSFW, or even more NSFW is the full version)…