Up until now, my strangest hotel spa experience ever has been when I stayed at a Marriott property in China, and the spa therapist tried to aggressively “hard sell” off-menu spa services. Despite repeated denials, the hard selling, and heavy inner thigh rubbing, continued. Well, I think I just had an even stranger — or at least more unpleasant — massage, and it borders on comical…
Before I get into this, let me of course acknowledge that this is all a first world problem, so please don’t take this too seriously. There are obviously much bigger issues in the world.
In this post:
Masseuse complains constantly about how her hands hurt
We’re currently on a big family trip to South Tyrol, which has been absolutely lovely (minus the heat wave, of course). South Tyrol is incredible in so many ways, with amazing scenery, food, wine, and people. The hotels here also have a big focus on wellness, all with expansive spas that have all kinds of facilities.
We’re currently staying at a beautiful boutique property, and the spa menu had been placed in our welcome pamphlets. Prices for spa treatments at luxury properties have gone through the roof over the years, and nowadays it’s not uncommon to see hour-long massages costing $200-300. So we were downright delighted when we saw that the 50-minute massages were going for €85, and there’s a 20% discount if you have your appointment before 2PM, bringing the cost down to €68.
Of course you can get cheaper massages on the streets of Thailand, but for a real spa in a nice hotel in Europe, that’s about as reasonable pricing as I’ve seen (especially in a culture where a 20% tip isn’t expected).
So I decided to go to the spa shortly after checking in to make appointments for the whole family. We had a very active trip up until this point, and relaxing a bit sounded nice. We booked Ford and his mom appointments the first day, I booked myself an appointment the next day, and I booked my dad an appointment for the day after that, just based on our schedules.
We all opted for the “sport & vitality massage,” described as “designed to relieve tension after sporting activities and provide maximum support for muscle regeneration.” Sounds great!
Ford was first into the lion’s den… I mean, to the spa… and as he finished, he sent me the below text.
As he described it, he asked for deep pressure at the beginning of the massage, and then the masseuse spent 50 minutes basically just rubbing his body with oil, with the lightest pressure imaginable. He quickly ran his hand over my arm to give an example of the pressure.
Ford’s mom was next (they had back-to-back massages). Of course we were very curious to hear her take, so once she was done, we asked what she thought. Her answer? “I wasn’t going to say anything, but that was the worst massage of my life.”
She explained she asked the therapist for harder pressure during the massage, and the therapist responded by holding up her hands and saying “my hands, they hurt, four months” (she didn’t speak much English, but I’d assume four months referred to how long she has been working in this role, or something… and that’s too long, I guess?).
My massage was the following morning, and by the time I got this feedback, it was within the 24 hour period where you couldn’t cancel for free. Honestly, I would’ve forced them to cancel my reservation, but at this point I figured I had to experience this for myself as well.
I actually didn’t make any requests at all (beyond the massage type I had booked), but instead, she just repeatedly proactively apologized:
- About 15 minutes into the massage, she held up her hands and just repeatedly rotated them at a 180-degree angle, while saying “my hands”
- About 30 minutes into the massage, she said “it’s okay? I’m sorry, my hands,” while again holding up her hands
- At the conclusion of the massage, she said “sorry, three massages yesterday, it hurts”
I don’t want to be a jerk, but even aside from pressure, this was genuinely the least skilled massage I’ve ever received:
- I’m not convinced she had any professional training, as there wasn’t really any technique to it
- She basically just spent 50 minutes lathering me in what must be toxic quantities of oil, because it just never stopped
- The pressure was closer to a Swedish massage than a deep tissue, but at least a Swedish massage has some sort of rhythm to it
- She couldn’t even time the massage correctly, because I ended up on my stomach for 15 minutes (so she did my legs and back), then she had me turn over, then she did my legs, then she did my upper body, and then she did my legs again, I guess because she still had too much time remaining
- And I won’t even talk about how she kept referring to Ford as my “brother,” and asking where my wife was, which didn’t actually bother me, but was just sort of the icing on the cake
For what it’s worth, this is a one person spa operation, so she was also the person working the spa reception, who then handed me the bill. At the end she asked “everything okay?” I mean, how do you even answer that, when the person apologized to you three times for their hands being tired during the treatment?
How does one even begin to address this situation?
Obviously I don’t know exactly what the therapist’s hand pain situation was, but I sympathize with her. I’ve had hand and wrist pain over the years from typing too much, and it has been a real struggle at times. I get it.
But also, if you’re going to work as a massage therapist, having hand pain that prevents you from performing the advertised spa treatments sort of seems like a deal breaker, no?
It’s awkward when the person performing the (poor) service is also the person who hands you the check and confirms everything was “okay,” despite her repeated apologies for not being able to properly massage. I should also note that this woman’s English was very limited (she didn’t speak German, but did speak Italian, which I don’t speak).
I know I’m a total pushover, but this is where I’m conflicted. I know I should report her to whoever the property manager is, and she should be sent packing for the season, or until this pain is no longer an issue. It can’t be that people are paying for services, and then each person is simply apologized to because they’re not getting the service they booked. Like if I’m having to say “oh, I’m sorry to hear that” three times during a 50-minute massage, something is seriously wrong.
At the same time, I imagine she relies on this job to make a living, so that’s where my sympathetic side kicks in. I think the hotel is largely responsible here for who they hired for the role, because I can’t imagine this was a sudden thing, and I can’t imagine she’s terribly qualified in the first place. 
Bottom line
I never thought I’d have a hotel spa treatment that would top the “hard selling” of off-menu services I had at a Marriott in China. But I’m just wrapping up a stay at a hotel in South Tyrol where the therapist seemingly just wasn’t able to apply any pressure due to hand pain, down to the point that she brought it up three times during my short massage. I sympathize with her, but also, it seems that maybe she shouldn’t be performing these treatments?
If you’d like to just be slathered in oil and have someone lightly run their hand over your entire body, I’d highly recommend this place. Otherwise, I’d recommend saving your time and money.
How would you handle this strange spa experience, and how would you have handled it?
Ben - Why drop the "South Tyrol" reference like average readers are supposed to know where that is? I had to look it up...
Sounds like it was an unhappy ending.
If you can’t use your hands, maybe use your mou.. elbows?
I think it is correct for Ben at least to tell others about their bad experiences and Ford is correct that you get what you pay for. So, it makes me wonder if the prices are cheap because others have had bad experiences there too. And Ben wrote that her hands hurt because she did three massages the day before. A professionally trained, skilled and experienced massage therapist would have probably said oh, it was...
I think it is correct for Ben at least to tell others about their bad experiences and Ford is correct that you get what you pay for. So, it makes me wonder if the prices are cheap because others have had bad experiences there too. And Ben wrote that her hands hurt because she did three massages the day before. A professionally trained, skilled and experienced massage therapist would have probably said oh, it was a slow day yesterday as I only had three bookings.
She probably rents that place if it is a one person operation and she should hire more experienced employees to help her get the business booming and then she can just manage the front desk and her hands wouldn’t hurt anymore. And for those that wrote she relies on this job for her income but it isn’t right for customers to support her business for such a bad job. It is like saying do not complain to the manager about the food server for doing a poor job and continue to tip her well for those in America because she needs the money.
€68 isn't cheap in a rural location where the average salary is less than €35k. Bolzano isn't Geneva or San Francisco.
@Throwawayname
1. It is cheaper than the advertised price of 85 euros.
2. You would expect better from a boutique property.
3. Also, if you are saying that 68 euros isn’t cheap then Ben and his family should be complaining about paying all that money (68 euros times three) for the terrible experience and it is an assumption that Ben probably cancelled his father’s booking.
Of course they should be complaining about it! I would have been livid!
I would have cancelled and fiscusssd with spa manager re cancellation charge. If she is too hurt to work, that’s sad, but that isn’t a reason for you to continue.
Why aren't you requesting a masseur?
Never get massage services at a hotel.
All this internal conflict and dilemma is neurotic. The massage was terrible x3. Present hotel management with constructive commentary. The department overseeing spa services needs to be aware the product on offer does not deliver, which btw you are paying for.
You have a responsibility to your fellow travelers and frequent travelers to report this to the management. How will they learn if no one guides them? Maybe you validate their behavior by not reporting anything. Can’t believe there is any other choice. You hav to say Madame you are not happy here and you are suffering through the day so I think you should go somewhere where you can get joy from your work. That’s the kind way to fire someone!
You say she didn't speak much English, but considering you were in South Tyrol did you try switching to German? My understanding is that most people who live there speak it natively despite being part of Italy, though of course she could be in the minority there.
@Miguel Ben wrote in his article that she did not speak German but she spoke limited English and she spoke Italian.
I’m going to Bolzano with my family in two days. Dying to know where you are Ben.
I’m also curious. I was just in Ritten (immediately north of Bolzano) last week!
At least there was not "HARD" sell offered this time ! ..... lol
Total sidebar: Now I can't unsee you and Ford as "brothers". You do have some similar facial features. Kinda funny that came up lol. Happy Pride Month by the way!
I wasn't there so it's hard to judge, but I'd say on the balance, just let it go. Like you said, she might rely on the income, and the hands pain may not be her fault. If it's a luxury hotel where people have the ability to pay for it, and all you got taken for was less than $100 and got a good story to write about, I'd say it cancels out. If it's bad enough, someone will eventually speak out. Don't let it be you.
What a clueless comment. You're exactly the type of person that makes the world a worse place, and more precisely, allows it get worse. An irresponsible person like you who just "lets the next guy fix it" shouldn't even be allowed to participate in modern civil society, let alone travel. If someone does something wrong, speak up and put an end to it! No need for a bunch of second-guessing and internal conflict!
Take it down a notch Karen. He asked for readers’ opinion. This is mine. If you don’t like me traveling or my views on the world then stay at a different hotel than I.
Asking for her to be send home for the season is basically asking that she is fired.
Your blog is widely read and the lady is very easily identified. As such I am a bit disappointed in that you single out a person in such a way. You could have talked to management without this naming and shaming.
So, a travel blogger should never share a bad review if there is any chance it could have consequences to those offering bad service? So, Ben has a bad experience (×3) and should just keep mum? Why would one want to read travel blogs if this was the case? (Yeah, I know, to "discuss" politics)
This is Italy, not Thailand. If she is sent packing, it would be for a long workplace injury recovery period, with full salary.
@Ben, since it was in South Tyrol, any chance the food was served by the mother of #1 ranked tennis player in the world? :) That family apparently has quite a work ethic.
We don't know whether it's an employee of the hotel or a self-employed person paying them a bit of rent for the space.
None of you should have paid for a service you didn't receive. I had a similar experience at a Steigenberger in Tunisia a few years. An untrained masseuse basically just covering me in oil for an hour. I got up, asked to speak with the spa manager and the hotel's GM and the massage was comped and a nice bottle of wine sent to the room. They knew she wasn't trained and thought they could get away with it.
Consistent with my experience of the Steigenberger brand.
I bet when Ben gets scammed by some guy taking $30k for fixing his roof and just pockets the money, he would say "Yeah but I don't want to go to the police, what if they arrest that poor guy? He probably just didn't know how to fix a roof."
It'll be because it's just $30k and sometimes people in life get what they pay for, such as when giving someone a mere €68 for 50 minutes' work at a location where the average hourly rate is a whopping €17.
Silly analogy. I would take what steps were necessary to recover a 5-digit sum (heck, even high 3 digits). Now, if someone tries to scam $20 from me, I'd probably waste way too much time to deal with it. Somebody gives me a lousy haircut, it isn't worth the hassle---I just won't return. I value my time, and more so, in recent years, my peace of mind. I'd be unlikely to raise a stink in...
Silly analogy. I would take what steps were necessary to recover a 5-digit sum (heck, even high 3 digits). Now, if someone tries to scam $20 from me, I'd probably waste way too much time to deal with it. Somebody gives me a lousy haircut, it isn't worth the hassle---I just won't return. I value my time, and more so, in recent years, my peace of mind. I'd be unlikely to raise a stink in a case like this with service, just poor service, provided. This is not necessarily a scam. Only a naive person would think that means they can scam me out of the same amount of money.
@This comes to mind, humans don't always do a spreadsheet calculation when it comes to these things. I've certainly made multiple escalated complaints about certain low-value stuff which annoyed me, and there are parts of the world (e.g. Crete) where multi-generational vendettas that started as a dispute about a couple of square metres of land have claimed multiple lives. Equally, one may take the $30k dispute to court, lose on a technicality and then decide...
@This comes to mind, humans don't always do a spreadsheet calculation when it comes to these things. I've certainly made multiple escalated complaints about certain low-value stuff which annoyed me, and there are parts of the world (e.g. Crete) where multi-generational vendettas that started as a dispute about a couple of square metres of land have claimed multiple lives. Equally, one may take the $30k dispute to court, lose on a technicality and then decide they can't deal with the stress of an appeal despite having decent chances of a successful outcome.
The assertion that our species is capable of separating reason from emotion has basically been debunked by neuroscience.
I'd talk to the hotel manager. If it's three people with the same experience across two different days, then there's a problem. Who's to say she doesn't give these excuses to every single other customer so she (maybe) doesn't have to work hard for her pay? Unfortunately, people like that exist.
The only beneficial massage is the Finland stick-beating after the sauna , and then dive into the icy water . Invigorating .
Hotel spa massages are merely a money grab .
You would be doing this woman a favor. She'd be allowed to go home for a few months and heal.
Why would you not mention the hotel name? It looks like the Torgglhof in Kaltern
Part of why I like Ben's blog is how he reflects well the detailed internal dilemmas we all often face in life. I can see myself thinking through the exact same way with this situation. My two cents: If the massages were truly as bad as you say, then this is something I would gently report to the hotel manager. I would do so politely and sympathetically, acknowledging her injury and the low price, and...
Part of why I like Ben's blog is how he reflects well the detailed internal dilemmas we all often face in life. I can see myself thinking through the exact same way with this situation. My two cents: If the massages were truly as bad as you say, then this is something I would gently report to the hotel manager. I would do so politely and sympathetically, acknowledging her injury and the low price, and without even asking for a discount or any recompense. But the manager really should know about this if this is a part of the hotel's offerings. I might not do so if this is in a really poor country and the price was dirt cheap (you get what you pay for), but this is Austria and the price was still not super cheap.
I would have cranked down in front of her and called it even.
Of course you have to talk to the Manager. If not for you at least for all the future guests.
The subject of massage quality can be subjective. Nevertheless, I would have had a nice chat with her, telling her something like maybe she should see a doctor or physical therapist because of her pain complaints, a massage therapist needs to have good hands, that you were expecting more pressure, etc. I would be saying this more to help her than anything else. If nobody says anything to her, how can the situation improve? Maybe...
The subject of massage quality can be subjective. Nevertheless, I would have had a nice chat with her, telling her something like maybe she should see a doctor or physical therapist because of her pain complaints, a massage therapist needs to have good hands, that you were expecting more pressure, etc. I would be saying this more to help her than anything else. If nobody says anything to her, how can the situation improve? Maybe it would click in her head or maybe not but you'd be out of there soon and cannot solve every problem that comes up.
It's not easy to have a conversation like that without speaking the same language.
I'm amazed that you like massages to begin with, @Ben, especially because you always describe yourself as an introvert. I'm an introvert too and there's no way a stranger will ever be able to massage me! I won't even take a scalp massage, lol
This seems stupid. You don't have to talk during a massage. Introverts might like the time to relax.
I am literally a hermit living in rural Maine, but love massages. It is quiet and I just lay there.