Do Chaotic & Dishonest Announcements Speed Up Aircraft Boarding?

I’m not trying to be sassy, but I’m curious to hear how others feel about this…

Why are boarding announcements in the US so aggressive?

To state the obvious, flying norms around the world differ. Boarding a domestic flight within Japan vs. boarding a domestic flight within the United States might make you think you’re on two different planets.

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For example, when you fly most world class Asian carriers, there are almost no announcements onboard the aircraft during boarding. Instead, there’s beautiful boarding music playing, and flight attendants communicate in a calm and professional manner.

In the United States, it’s often the opposite. I’m not meaning to single out any particular airline, but as an example, I just took a flight on American, which perhaps most accurately summed up how chaotic boarding announcements can be.

It of course starts with the gate agents. They often create panic by telling people they’re going to have to check bags, that the flight is completely full, and that it’s up to passengers to ensure that the flight isn’t delayed, based on their actions.

Then I had a flight attendant who was otherwise very friendly, but I couldn’t believe her constant announcements. She made eight announcements during the 40-minute boarding process:

• Starting 30 minutes before departure, she started announcing how we were past our door close time, and that if everyone didn’t settle in quickly, we’d be delayed (that’s just a flat out lie, but okay)
• She then explained that if passengers couldn’t find overhead bin space they should bring their bags forward to be gate checked, and that this would delay the flight (what exactly do you want people to do with that information?)
• She kept saying how many passengers had international connections, and they would miss them if we were delayed (mind you, this was a flight to LaGuardia, which does have flights to Canada, but that’s it…)

That’s just the announcements she made over the PA prior to the door closing, and doesn’t include her yelling at the door, including her constant (very bad) Spanish of “A, B, C a la derecha, D, E, F a la izquierda.” You’d think we were emergency evacuating the plane, rather than boarding.

This is just one example, but I think anyone who has flown in the United States can confirm that boarding isn’t a relaxing experience, but instead, it’s filled with announcements that include threats, and puts the burden of an on-time departure on passengers, rather than the airline.

Go figure that despite the threats of our delay and everyone missing all those important international connections, we departed early and arrived early.

Do these announcements actually accomplish anything?

I think the flight attendants that make these super chaotic announcements are typically well intentioned. Flight attendants are trained about the importance of on-time departures, and they believe that making these kinds of announcements will help with ensuring that. I dunno, or maybe some just enjoy hearing their own voices.

So I can’t help but wonder… does any of this actually accomplish anything? US airlines generally have the longest boarding processes of anywhere in the world. I think that comes down to a variety of factors — our complicated boarding systems (since boarding is intended to coddle elites and get people to sign-up for credit cards), oversized carry-ons due to lack of available overhead bin space, a general “hunger games” style competition to board, plus lack of staffing at the gate and onboard.

While I understand why boarding is slow, do these kinds of aggressive, threatening, and often dishonest announcements, actually accomplish anything? Do they cause people to board more quickly and more orderly?

Despite threats that basically make people feel like they’re personally responsible if there’s a delay, it doesn’t seem like it actually speeds anything up. Quite to the contrary, I think we’re so used to being yelled at while flying, with constant threats of operational breakdowns, that we’re just desensitized to it, and it goes in one ear, and out the other.

With that in mind, I have two thoughts. First of all, I’d love to see an airline trial just not making any announcements during the main phase of boarding, and see if it at all impacts the efficiency. I’d be willing to bet the answer is “no.” It would certainly make the whole experience less stressful, in terms of not having to listen to people yell.

At a minimum, I’d love to see airlines actually ask flight attendants to read off a script, rather than them each adding their own flair to it. Ideally that announcement would actually come across as friendly and welcoming, starting with something like “welcome aboard, we’re glad to have you flying with us today.” I think this is an area where European airlines do a much better job than US airlines.

Bottom line

If you ask me, there’s nowhere in the world where boarding is consistently as chaotic as in the United States (okay maybe in Egypt or something, but…). US airlines tend to board flights very early, and then there are constant announcements during boarding which almost feel threatening.

It includes threats of how passengers are responsible for delaying flights, and I can’t help but feel like it just creates a cycle of stress. Worst of all, I’m convinced it doesn’t actually accomplish much, because how much more slowly could we collectively board planes?

What’s your take on the “vibe” of boarding flights in the United States? Am I the only one who notices these things?