There are a lot of hotly contested airplane etiquette topics out there, ranging from who controls the window shades, to whether reclining your seat is a right or privilege, to when it’s appropriate to swap seats with others, to standing up as soon as the plane arrives at the gate. I have strong opinions on most of these topics, though here’s one where I never know what to do.
This is minor in the grand scheme of things, but I’m still curious how others handle this situation.
In this post:
“Please stay seated to allow those with connections…”
Have you ever been on a flight that’s running behind schedule, and either shortly before landing or just after landing, the flight attendant announces something along the lines of:
“I’m going to ask you for a favor. We have some passengers making tight connections, and we would really appreciate if you could stay seated after the seatbelt sign goes off to allow these people to deplane first. We know you’d appreciate that same courtesy if you were in their shoes.”
Sometimes they’ll ask the passengers making tight connections to ring their call buttons so they can be identified, sometimes they’ll give a specific time range for what they consider to be a tight connection, and sometimes they’ll just let people decide for themselves what constitutes a short connection.
On the surface this is a nice and logical gesture. If me sitting on the plane for a little extra time means someone will make it home to see their family, or make it on a well deserved vacation, I’m all for it. But I’m becoming jaded when it comes to this, and I’m curious how others feel.
The problem is that most people don’t actually listen
The biggest problem with these announcements is that almost no one listens. So in those situations where I stay seated, I find that I’m basically the last person off the plane.
I had a flight once where we were over 40 minutes late, and one flight attendant recommended to the other flight attendant that they make such an announcement. Her response was “I’ve been doing it for 20 years, and I’ve never seen anyone listen,” yet she still made the announcement.
The fact that virtually no one listens is only one of the things that has made me jaded about this over the years. The other problems include that:
- People can’t be trusted to self-identify — often the people thinking their connections are really short actually don’t have short connections at all (they just don’t travel often, misread the boarding time as the departure time, etc.), or they already missed their connections, so have no chance of getting on that flight
- People book stupid connections, and airlines are at fault for creating a system that encourages this — airlines rely so heavily on banked hubs and unrealistic minimum connection times; people probably shouldn’t have booked a 45-minute connection in Dallas to begin with, but it’s not really their fault when the airline displays those convenient-looking options so prominently
- There’s also a herd mentality element to this, so once some people stop listening, everyone seems to stop listening
So, how do I handle these deplaning requests?
How do I handle these situations? I try to be courteous, which is to say that if the crew specifically identifies a few people, or if some people push forward, I’ll of course let them off first. But I’m done being among the only people who listens.
It makes me feel bad to do that, but I also feel like there’s no point. Personally I think airlines need to do a better job managing these situations, rather than relying on passengers to step in and help. In other words, we’re supposed to do our part to help people make their connections, while gate agents close the door 10 minutes early on those people because those are the metrics they’re rewarded on.
I’m happy to see that airlines like United are increasingly holding connections for late arriving passengers, using a straightforward and transparent system that factors in a variety of considerations.
Bottom line
When flights are running late, it’s common for flight attendants to request that most passengers stay seated, so that those with tight connections can maximize their odds of not misconnecting. While this is well intentioned, the issue is that a vast majority of people don’t listen. So if you do listen, you basically end up being the last person off the plane, even if you’re seated toward the front.
Where do you stand on this — when flight attendants ask people to stay seated, do you listen? Do you appreciate when flight attendants do this?
You're only sacrificing two minutes of your life to let people by. Stop being so hyper-defensive. Chill out and let a few people walk past you - in the bigger picture of life those two minutes are minuscule.
Stay in your seat until it is your turn. If you have flown in Hawaii inter-island you will see that is how the locals roll and it works quite well.
As a customer and an American, I believe in capitalism and survival of the fittest. When the plane stops, I'm up and ready to be the first one off the plane even if I'm further back. Haven't had anyone say no yet and on occassions where they use the second doors instead of the front doors, I always demand the flight attendant to let us first class passengers go first (what's the point of calling it first otherwise).
Funny
Slightly surprised this hasn't lit up quicker and degenerated into a slugfest of entertainment in comment section over PST lunchtime LAS PHX DEN both seem to have tight connections to west coast airports for people coming from east. To the comment about United waiting a fun fact. As I was coming back from Canada I experienced this on a United flight. They said they were waiting for 20 passengers. I didn't think it was possible...
Slightly surprised this hasn't lit up quicker and degenerated into a slugfest of entertainment in comment section over PST lunchtime LAS PHX DEN both seem to have tight connections to west coast airports for people coming from east. To the comment about United waiting a fun fact. As I was coming back from Canada I experienced this on a United flight. They said they were waiting for 20 passengers. I didn't think it was possible 20 open seats on the plane to begin with... But much to my surprise as I was observing possibly only 2-3 boarded the plane. So that leads me to believe.
A.) they really were trying to wait. However, something continued to go wrong. The time continued to push back and they just decided to throw their hands up and let it go for the rest or
B.) they grossly exaggerated and we're trying to placate those who had a further onward connection they might miss
I can tell you the passenger behind me was not happy and ranted for about 5 minutes about it to flight attendant pulling the dykwia
The lady in the middle seat in my row indicated to the aisle seat person. They had a tight connection upon arrival and asked if they could kindly get up first .
I guess I'll add that when they made the original announcement that they were waiting for. 20ppl They gave a new departure time which I thought was interesting and then they definitely left gate on the dot To that new departure time
Someday there will be things called computers that will let crew know which seats have tight connections and the helpful crew will proactively assist the passengers flagged by the computer during deplaning especially when the flight is late.
I had this happen recently. On late arrival in Singapore, Singapore Airlines escorted me and a couple of other passengers to our far-away connecting gate, assuring us they were waiting for us for the last flight of the night.
Of course, as we approached the new gate, we got to wave at our plane departing the ramp. Unbelievable example how NOT to do it, by the "world's best airline."
Yet another etiquette story...
There is no quandary here. Sit your ass down until it is your turn to deplane. There is no room in the isle for everybody and their carry-ons. Zeez!
I don't think ti actually helps. Often, I'm in the aisle seat and someone at the window might have the tight connection. Does it make it any quicker if I get up to let them out and then sit down again? Probably not and doing this over and over again for other rows likely doesn't actually save any time, it creates more congestions and people moving around to let others out.
I generally just ignore them period now as well, barring people immediately around me where I've overheard that they do in fact have a tight connection and our flight is late.
What really annoys me is the number of time people try to push past for a 'tight connection' for an on time or early arrival. That has happened to me on a shockingly high number of flights. We are early, how do you have a tight connection?
I generally just ignore them period now as well, barring people immediately around me where I've overheard that they do in fact have a tight connection and our flight is late.
What really annoys me is the number of time people try to push past for a 'tight connection' for an on time or early arrival. That has happened to me on a shockingly high number of flights. We are early, how do you have a tight connection?
Had happened to me twice last year where weather delays meant I had <20 min to get across SFO and DEN for my connection. Surprisingly both times a good amount of people stayed seated but I was also “politely aggressive” in making my urgency known and pushing ahead.
The hardest part about these was since I’ve lost status the airline will no longer hold seats on two flights for me. With nearly full flights each...
Had happened to me twice last year where weather delays meant I had <20 min to get across SFO and DEN for my connection. Surprisingly both times a good amount of people stayed seated but I was also “politely aggressive” in making my urgency known and pushing ahead.
The hardest part about these was since I’ve lost status the airline will no longer hold seats on two flights for me. With nearly full flights each time I had to make the gamble to change my second flight in the app so I’m not stuck for hours or over night waiting for a seat or try to hope I can make the original.
Turned out okay both times but unnecessary stress. I wonder how well a policy of asking passenger up front (in economy) mid flight if they are willing to move to a seat near the back (right before beginning decent to trade with someone with a tight connection) for a free drink or extra miles would work
The problem with these courtesy disembarking requests is that there's not a great/clear way for people to know who is supposed to be given way to. Unless the FAs have been very clear and e.g. asked people to raise their hands and participate so people around them can actively see and be courteous. They rarely do that. And then even more basic, people just aren't listening that well.
The other thing is some airlines...
The problem with these courtesy disembarking requests is that there's not a great/clear way for people to know who is supposed to be given way to. Unless the FAs have been very clear and e.g. asked people to raise their hands and participate so people around them can actively see and be courteous. They rarely do that. And then even more basic, people just aren't listening that well.
The other thing is some airlines ask people to deplane row by row, basically asking/implying for everyone behind that row to remain seated. While it does yield a more courteous and less hectic process, it way underuses people's time to get ready and immediately out towards the exit when their row turn arrives. They have to spend the time now getting up and getting bags, leaving the whole forward aisle unused, when they could've been getting ready well beforehand if everyone were allowed to get up.
Sometimes if I have a long connection, the avgeek in me wants to be the last to disembark to take photos of the cabin heh
*arriving to the gate* (remain seated)
*ding* (your choice to get up, start collecting your things, within reason)