The Downside To Making Friends With Hotel Staff

All things considered, living in hotels is pretty swell. I’ve really gotten to know the staff at the hotels I frequent most, which is awesome. They’ve almost become my extended family in many ways, and it really does help to make a hotel feel more like a home.

However, there’s one unintended consequence of getting to know hotel staff which I hadn’t really thought about until I started to repeatedly face it firsthand. The way I see it, one of the nice things about living in hotels is that you have some level of anonymity. In other words, if I wander to the lobby in my pajamas I might be judged, but I don’t really care, since I don’t know those people.

However, that starts to become a bit of an issue when you do start to know the people working in a hotel.

For example, back when I lived in the Seattle area I was known at my local Starbucks as the guy who wears pajamas. Because I’d show up at the same time every morning. Dressed for work. In my pajamas (that is the official dress code here at One Mile at a Time, after all!).

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Only after moving away did I fully realize that probably wasn’t something to be proud of. 😉

So this does become a bit of an issue when you’re a caffeine-powered earlybird. It’s not that I care what people think about me, per se, but when you know people you do at a minimum feel the obligation to brush your teeth, comb your hair, and put on real clothes, and ideally even shower, before “presenting” yourself in the lobby.

And perhaps equally awkward is when you know the breakfast staff and bring a different friend to breakfast every morning. Not because anything interesting happened the night before, but rather because you figure you might as well invite them over for free breakfast. Suffice to say they surely think my life is much more interesting than it actually is.

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I’m curious if I’m the only one. How “presentable” do you feel you have to be in public when staying at a hotel, and does it depend on whether you know people there or not?

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Jason Guest

My answer will be NO! I think the only factor affects how I dress and appear in a hotel is the hotel brand. For instance I would be comfortable to wear a T-shirt and shorts in a Hampton Inn or a Hilton Garden Inn. But in a Conrad or a Waldorf Astoria hotel, I will definitely be well-dressed.

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Matze Guest

its an interesting question i already asked myself couple of times. I see it two-sided: 1. i always like it when i return to a hotel and i see familiar faces and also get recognized as an individual rather then just receiving a standard warm greeting or phrase. after a a certain number of stays good hotels just get your preferences right and make your stay special with those little things (on top of the normal status benefits). it really gives me this constant while being on the road all the time. I normally value it more while being on a business trip than on a private trip. 2. as you said:"the anonymity gets lost" - and anonymity can be really nice at times. just being a "normal" guest. why? because for some reason i care less about the things i do in a hotel when i am not a frequent guest. not because i act completely different but just the feeling that comes along with it. i have my preferred hotel in all cities i go to on a frequent basis but i normally switch between a few ones to keep the balance. based on the purpose of the trip and length of stay i normally decide if i want anonymity or a more familiar feel.

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Cory Guest

I am completely shameless. I will make sure I am wearing enough to not get arrested. But, beyond that...I don't care what anyone thinks. Bare feet on planes? Sure. Now, I won't put them up on the bulkhead wall or slide them onto the armrest of the seats in front of me. That's just rude. But, wearing pajamas...I'm cool with that. Flip flops? Yup, in just about any situation. Shorts? You bet. In fact, I take a reverse snob position when I encounter a bar that doesn't allow shorts or sandals. I proudly refuse to go to any bar that has a dress code or a cover charge. Their belief that I am not good enough for their establishment just proves the opposite...I am too good for their establishment :)

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Brian New Member

Lucky I know exactly how you feel. Years ago I spent nearly 9 months at the Westin Taipei (when it had just opened and I was the first guest to stay in the room!) and that hotel staff grew to be my family. If I couldn’t sleep I would go down to the front desk and just chat with staff. I would hang out with them in their breakroom. I even got invited to the staff Christmas party. It was always a professional relationship – they always call me Mr. Jackson and not Brian. Even though we were hanging out in the breakroom, I was always a guest and never a buddy or friend. When I eventually checked out, the front desk agents were crying and the GM threw me a farewell party. However, it was awkward when I would return to the hotel on a Friday and Saturday night at 2:00 AM with a “friend”. Or if I didn’t return to the hotel until early Sunday morning, the ‘walk of shame’ was embarrassing. At times it was almost like living with my parents. But in the end, there were way more positives than negatives.

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Xulu Guest

Not long ago Ben supported Qantas introducing a dress code in their Lounge - little did we know he was meanwhile tramping round hotels in his PJ's!

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