Ben and I are in China right now, and overall it’s been a really fun trip. We stayed at a couple of beautiful SPG properties, and decided to get Chinese massages at one of the hotel spas. I’d never had a Chinese massage before, and was excited to experience it, as a massage in a…
Continue reading: OMG: Luxury Hotel “Hard Selling” Off-Menu Spa Services
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I had the exact same experience at an SPG hotel in southern China last year. I filed a complaint with the hotel gm and he promised a response and that the issue would be addressed. Never heard back and I never ended up following up. Quite disgusting, and an overall uncomfortable experience. I suppose that's the norm for the area, but I expected better of SPG.
Not sure why you folks are so "shocked"... welcome to the real World people. It's quite cultural to provide happy endings there - why do you think all the dodgy spas in the US are Asian?!
Be less prude and more realistic!!
If she persisted like that I would have used the translation app on the phone to say, “How do you say ‘syphilis’ in Mandarin?” I only got a massage once in my life, a couples massage with my wife at a very high end hotel. I never imagined this happened at that kind of property.
Uhh... What hotel? I travel often in China, often getting massages, and I would like to avoid the situation altogether.
I generally tend to find sports masseuses... not "enjoyable" in the same way, but almost certainly not going to result in any confusion about happy endings!
Often get massages with my wife and we always get a couples room. Would of made for an interesting situation with my wife there. Would they offer her the same service. Only fair right?
Don't we all travel internationally to immerse ourselves in the foreign culture? Indulge. Its definitely not something to complain about.
It's normal in China, most luxury hotels will be like this and some 4 star hotels even have brothels (I remember a well known 4 star hotel in Guanzhou where a lot of foreigners went while waiting for the paperwork to adopt children that had a brothel and that would slip advertisements in the rooms of single customers).
It's actually relatively hard to find a massage place where you won't be offered an happy ending, there are few chains that really specialize in professional massages and won't do that and in actual beauty parlors (the real ones, not the fake ones targetting men), you usually won't have that.
Never had this luck. In which hotel did this happened? This would be a greater selling point to me than 10k SPG welcome bonus. 🙂
Just let them jerk you off. What's the harm in that. Were either of you aroused? If you're laying there with a boner, why not let them finish you off.
As others have said, this is quite the norm in the area, although I would have expected the staff at a hotel spa to have handled things a bit better. I remember on one occasion at a fairly upscale spa in the mainland I was presented with a menu of options by the English-speaking employee who politely informed me that "full service" was also available for a slight charge. I've never actually had staff that wouldn't take no for an answer.
This does have something to do with where you are in china, places in southern china are likely for this to happen, guangzhou, shenzhen, and the old pleasure city of dongguan. its very odd that this happened at time of the year, as its National Day 10/1 national week and crackdowns are being performed in large cities like shanghai for the holidays.
care to divulge which city occurred in?
"She responded to some texts, flaccidly massaged me..."
"but I did not feel that I’d been shafted"
10/10 writing
So you can imagine how much massage foreign straight guys must get whenever they are in this part of the country, lol.
I would be terrified.
I was offered this once by a male massage therapist at the Palms in LV. I'm cool with a dude lending me a hand, but not for a fee, and was a bit taken aback since I couldn't recall any part of our interaction until that point that would have suggested I'd be interested in this finishing touch. I guess some people just have perfect gaydar. When I declined the service, he didn't press the issue further.
FWIW, in the US "happy endings" are often referred to in the penal code as "masturbation for hire" which is a misdemeanor.
The amount of puns in the article is OUTSTANDING!!! Congratulations on a hand job well done!
Overseas, esp in China ,Thailand, Vietnam, most think Americans want the extra treatment.
And depending on their looks, sometimes willing to go for it.
But when it's a NO, it's most definitely a NO.
Staying at a -star hotel international chain in India, with a group of colleagues: We were amazed that both men and women in our group were aggressively offered "off menu" selections at the spa, from "happy endings" to full-blown intercourse. Local flavor, I guess.
A lot my Asians friends have told me that it is common but not for a sexual reason entirely. The idea being that your whole body is relaxed except one part, so the goal is to completely relax you allover.
Again, this is what I have been told by am Asian friend.
That is why i never had a massage anywhere ,let alone at an asian hotel. As far as i know even the high end hotels in china sometimes outsource their massage services.
Right now i am in Budapest well known for spa but still that is not my cup of tea 🙂
I was at a five-star hotel in Kunming (A Chinese brand, not Western) a couple years back and got a massage. They were definitely a little more, uh, aggressive in terms of where they massaged, but, trying not to be a prude American, I let it go. Until it came to the solicitation. At which point I said no thanks, there was a back-and-forth and I decided to leave. A friend/colleague was also getting a massage at the same time in a separate room and had a similar experience.
I think people should be careful about generalizations about "Asia." This is unacceptable in Japan and if you asked, would probably get you in trouble. I doubt this occurs in Korea as well.
At least she asked... !
On my first int'l biz trip (ripe age of 21), my colleagues thought it would be a riot to break in the new guy. We went to one of those male beauty spas... walking distance from our Shanghai city center hotel.
There were five of us. Each guy was led away to a private massage room, where we were told to disrobe. Standard enough.
I always fall asleep during massages, so you might imagine my surprise waking up to a middle-aged Chinese woman rubbing my junk. Emerging from a dead sleep to discover a matronly woman all up in my business must have registered some serious disgust on my face, as the lady quickly backed into the corner of the room (as I covered my non-aroused self). I can't really describe her face as I gestured a no-fly-zone over my Green Card maker. She seemed to take it personally--as if she had failed in the line of duty (it's nothing personal lady, but I'm not the type of dude who has to pay for this service). We got back to some non-sexual rubbing, but it was totally phoned-in on her part. After 10 minutes of enduring her half-assed efforts, I got up and waited for my colleagues on the street. I don't think I got more than three words out ("Do you know..."); my coworkers were keeling over in laughter. They tried to convince me that they arranged for the oldest, mom-like masseuse, though I didn't buy it.
Worst part of the whole experience? Shortly after I got home, I noticed that I was severely itchy. Went to the dermatologist, and learned that I had some home with Scabies. Likely contracted via dirty sheets, the doc said. I no longer do off-broadway massages. Unwanted hand jobs are manageable. Dirty sheets are mind-blowingly sick.
WMLA , are you kidding me? This type of "service" was invented by Japanese and Korean, for the American soldiers. Nowaday, it is still widely practiced in Japan but you need to know the code; while Lorea is much more open about it. What do you think? who opened the most Asian massage parlors in US ? Korean or Chinese? take a guess.
Had the same offer happen when having a massage in a Marriott property in China. On another trip and staying in the same hotel, the wife and I did a couples massage and no happy ending offered.
I find this post rascist and an attack on Asian Woman. To assume anyone would want to touch you is disgusting and disgraceful.
In any event these woman were obviously very old and completely blind.
@Lu
True, but not true at 5-Star chain hotel spa in either Korea and Japan. Shady massage shops? Of course. Westin Seoul or Prince Gallery Tokyo spa doing this? No way.
>“lady, I highly doubt you’re as proficient at it as I am.”
I love you.
But you guys can't post stories like this, because the image of you boys naked on those massage tables is way too much for Ben's posse of 50-somethings to handle. Especially now when they're busy trashing poor Daniel.
In all seriousness, though, you need to out the hotel in a big way. They're obviously being told to do this and it's probably happening under intense pressure. By not naming and shaming the hotel, you're contributing to forced prostitution.
in response to "Lu" my family lived through US Occupation of Japan and so I know first hand what occurred. The Japanese have practised "Shiatsu" massage for centuries and it does not include a "happy ending." There are prostitutes in every Country. And it is common for women to fall in love and marry occupying soldiers. But sexual favors during a massage in Japan will land you in prison. If you don't believe, just ask next time you are at a Luxury Hotel and then tell us how the conditions are in Japanese prisons.
@Dan Allen - right on, constant theme in this blog. Every time Lucky writes about how an Asian flight attendant talks to him I can practically see him pulling up the corners of his eyes and speaking in some pidgin version of whatever the FA actually said. Not surprising the other (male) writers are the same.
@CP is right. I lived in Japan for the first 35 years of my life and never once was propositioned in a regular massage place. There are plenty of places to go (in Kabukicho, wherever) to get special services...
Lu, no high-end hotels or even mid-level hotels in Korea or Japan would offer this kind of service period. Looking at your name, it sounds like you are Chinese and getting quite defensive for no reason.
Although Korea and Japan do have rather flourishing red light culture, they don't offer services as described in this article ever. Imagine Park Hyatt Tokyo or Seoul's SPA providing such service. You can't because they don't.
I would like to put in an official request for Andrew to write more on this blog! Please. I love the way he creatively uses the language.
Canceling my subscription to P'House Letters, when I can have FREE reading material at OMAAT hehe thanks for the chuckle!
I suspect if it had been a masseur, rather than a masseuse, this story would have a completely different ending.
This was the perfect set-up to borrow the line from Big Bang Theory:"I've been responsible for my own orgasms since..."
Really this shocks you? Maybe I've lived in Asia too long (SE, not North, but same difference re:China) but I'd be shocked now if it wasn't offered.
I've been offered at everywhere from Ritz Carlton to Conrad to Shangri-La in the region.
Whatever you do please don't complain to corporate and get these girls in trouble - they make only a few dollars a day for what is an extremely tiring job, if they want to earn substantially more money for something that really is quite harmless who can blame them.
Remember, not every culture subscribes to America's puritanical prudish opinions regarding sex!
Is it normal to be fully naked in an all body massage? I've only had one once in Thailand where I was offered some sort of a net underwear but chose to keep my regular one on. It was a great massage btw.
I once was in a very nice luxury hotel in Honk Kong and decided to get a facial. I mean, have may facial skin clean of oil and comedones and so on and so forth
I was amazed when the woman told me to undress and put on a thong. :O
There were body massage involved lol
I just found out that sometimes a facial is not really just a facial.
This happened to my husband in Penang, Malaysia, and to me (who is female and had a female massage therapist) in Nha Trang, Vietnam. Never happened to us in Indonesia, Hong Kong, or Singapore, though.
We agreed it was the opposite of "relaxing"!
On or about 2005, I was having a massage at the Raffles Hotel in Siem Reap, Cambodia. At the time, it was THE and only five-star luxury hotel in Siem Reap. The masseuse after about a half-hour, asked me if I wanted him to use his tongue. You never saw a woman run out of the room so fast... I was mortified and regret not saying anything to the hotel.
When I book my massages now, I am very clear that I do not want anything "extra" included.
What they offered you was a “lingam massage” and its very popular in Asian and Indian massage practice. It is not a simple rub and tug like the usual happy ending. And Andrew, while you may be proficient at your own happy endings, a proper lingam massage performed by an experienced massage therapist is something else entirely. Try it sometime!
As some others have posted, the puns are hilarious!! 😀
Am I the only one who doesn't understand what "Jay fbished" means in the iMessage between Andrew and Ben? And, what's with the censoring? 😛
A) Excellent punage. Well done.
B) I just got off a plane from Southern China, where I stayed in a SPG property. I’ve been having back problems for weeks, and the first night there I told my wife I was thinking of getting a massage in the hotel since they left a coupon on the nightstand. SOOOOO glad I opted against it.
LOL at those saying this is part of "traditional" Asian "heritage" etc. Prostitution is less taboo in Asia than the West but getting offered a hand job is not some mystical "Mr. Miyagi" style heritage or learning experience, hahaha.
This is totally normal, with varying levels of discretion, in massage parlors, "barber shops", "soaplands" etc in the region, but I think it's a bit unusual to get such a "hard sell" in an international 5-star chain hotel. I would personally have politely declined but then left a comment on corporate website, it's not a matter of getting the girls in trouble but also of maintaining standards that make guests comfortable.
@Daniel totally agree in both Japan and Korea I could not imagine this being offered so overtly at a top-level hotel property and would expect the guest to potentially get in trouble for asking.
No top-luxury hotel in China will offer this. I’m talking about hotels like Park Hyatt Shanghai etc.
I could say it's common knowledge the massage girls in a lot of Chinese hotels can be half service girls in the spa, Or they can end up being full service girls if you request them to come to your room for the massage.
At first I was dumbfounded by this when a girl came upto my room and the way In the way she started massaging me. I was only after a massage and didn't see this woman I just called up the spa.
I quickly learnt and found out after my experience what it's all about especially after talking with more seasoned travellers in China.
@Tennen - I think that “Jay fbished” means "just finished" (it's the kind of typo I make that autocorrect doesn't catch).
I'm still laughing! Andrew, please keep writing often!
@AJ yep, pretty normal.
I just always hope I get a very ugly woman when getting full body massages cuz I get turned on SO easily and then when she asks me to turn around, its so embarrassing and hurts my penis so much....but Ive never been offered a happy ending (granted ive only gotten massages in America).
Ben, Andrew, why not let them just finish you off?
Had the same experience at T2 Max at PVG. Aggressive upsell and pretty sure got charged for the upsell even though not performed. $130 for 30 minutes (had to catch flight). The masseuse also wrote down her WeChat ID.
Got a massage at place prior to security. Upsell at check-in for two ladies that I accepted. They were suggestive but not pushy and did not ask. Again limited time because had to catch flight.
I had the same experience as Andrew and Ben on a 2005 trip to Tibet. I can’t remember what little town we were in, but it was the same deal. The hotel was a “luxury” property built and owned by the Chinese Communist Party. After some perfunctory work on my back, the girl pulled off her dress and said in broken English, “We make love now.” I politely declined, she insisted, I thought I’d be funny and said, nothing against her, but if the (very hot) doorman was willing to come up instead, I’d reconsider. I’m not sure she understood, but she left and 10 minutes later her “manager” was banging on my door demanding to know what was wrong with the girl. I just laughed and shut the door and that was that.
I've had this happen every time I've visited a hotel spa in China, other than Amanfayun or Aman Summer Palace. Having spent far too much time In China for work over the past decade, I contunue to marvel at the crass nature of contemporary China. Everything is for sale or on the menu (not just sexual services, but also all of the world's endangered species). Capitalism in China is an ugly, ugly thing.
This is pretty typical for China in my experience, and other parts of SE Asia as well. I would say from experience that these attempts are even more common in luxury hotels. Last time I was in China, I was given three options (standard massage, happy ending, and more).
My first time visiting China, the hotel spa was closed, and they walked me to a spa across the street that was in a basement. After walking past what looked like a gambling room, I was offered two types of massages. Thinking about it more, I don't think I've had a massage in China where there was not an attempt to upsell...
In Bali on my honeymoon with my wife, we had a couples massage and they were particularly attentive during our massage.
I don't think I would suggest outing the hotel as I think it's far too prevalent in that part of the world.
Look, as seasoned travelers, both of you should be aware of local customs. Anyone who has been to Southern China even a couple of times knows that these practices are common in a variety of settings. You can do what you want, but I would refrain mentioning it to corporate.
This is common in China but am surprised with the upcoming Congress. Been a 2-month vacation until October 18.
Usually i ask how much and get quoted an outrageous price so I just tell them I'll do it myself for free.
Welcome to Asia. This is normal in ANY Asian country you go to, especially if you’re white. But “freaking out” all because she wanted to offer you a bit of pleasure? Seems far fetched. Can you blame these massage therapists though? They make a few hundred dollars per month, work 7 days a week, 12-15 hour shifts with zero days off. That extra $30-$50 dollars you would have paid her would be her savings that she would send back to her family who she is away from trying to eek out a better life so her family can survive. They depend on these “tips” not because they get a thrill jerking you off but because it’s a matter of life or death for most of them. Not saying it’s right to give in to paying for sexual services but for many of them in these types of “spas” look forward to earning more.
I agree with you. I’ve been living in SE Asia for 14 years and I too get offered “extra” services at almost every massage place I go too, including in high end hotels like the Shangri-La. This is normal in this part of the world and acceptable especially as these China women hardly make any money.
I assume this is illegal. Seems a bit strange that so many people are OK with it if that's the case.
Also, not doing the "western businessman" image any favours here either... 😀
Yes, it is illegal but the police turn a blind eye to this sort of thing because it happens behind closed doors and unless numerous complaints are lodged, the police won't likely raid the place. Besides they would have to catch the massage therapist in the act before anything actually happens.
This sort of thing you can find anywhere in Asia. You just learn what places not to go to if you want to avoid happy endings.
Welcome to China whereby it’s a like market place to buy what you want for a price. Those Chinese can be very persistent and annoying at times, I am a Chinese from Singapore and so I’m not racist but just saying it from experiences of myself and what I’ve heard from friends etc.
I won’t say that’s a common thing offered in Asia, SE Asia ermm will be likely, depending on which part you visit, some places more some places neh. It does reminded me of a very funny experience couple years back when Me and my husband were in Singapore visiting. We were walking along the “shady” part of orchard road in Singapore and my husband is an American, I got side tracked while walking beside him and so I was behind him walking slowly still looking around at the changes of the area. Then there’s a lady walking up to him talking to him, I saw him kept waving his hand no and shaking his head no to her but she kept following him until he stopped and pointed at me. From the looks of both I knew what happened and smiled at them both and walked up to beside him and that lady turned and walk away. I didn’t even have to ask him what she’s asking him but told him this area wasn’t the glamourous part of orchard road and it’s common for it to happen.
Ah yes. The "shady" part of Orchard Road, otherwise known as Orchard Towers, or by the local term, "The Four Floors of Whores" 😉 I live in Singapore, and along Orchard Road, so I pass by this place daily. Daytime it's a ghost town but at night, it comes alive with some very interesting characters. Getting approached by these ladies is a common occurrence.
@Yvonne Of course you are a racist - You are NOT Chinese. You are Singaporean. And besides, it is possible for a person to be a racist to her own race - especially if she has already long disown her own people.
If you want a very good legit massage in China, go to a "Blind Massage" place. The government trains blind people in medical massage as a jobs program. It's very cheap to get an excellent massage. The way that you can tell that the place is legit is that it's brightly lit, you can see people getting massages through the window, and there is NO PRIVACY. People in China have a different sense of privacy than we do and it's perfectly normal there to get a massage in a room with 4 other people.
Back when I lived in Beijing there was a part of town where women would stand in the doorway wearing nightgowns, and there'd be a pink light above the door. That meant that they were really prostitutes. High end spas were a mixed bag; I went to one that had a reputation for being legit with a friend, and it turned out not to be. On the other hand, the place I normally went (Bodhi in Beijing) is completely legit; no untoward services are ever offered.
Additional “service” is normal in hotels, even high end ones, all over Asia. And they will generally only ask Caucasian men if they want this service. I can’t even begin to count how many high end hotels have spas where this is a very normal occurrence. You either get one and enjoy the experience or politely say no and just hope she finishes the massage on a good note.
@WMLA
Ok if we are going to throw ‘I know someone who knew someone’ takes out there, I’m a 20+ year resident of Japan and know for a fact happy ends places exist. If they don’t, I guess last week was just a dream. And the week before. And the week before that. You get my point?
Wife and I were in Hawaii, we saw a flyer advertising massage in our room. On vacation, why not, so we called and booked a couple's massage. An oriental couple showed up, looked to be 40's, in shape, they had two portable tables on roller carts. I figured the woman would do the wife and the guy me, but they had other ideas. My wife gave me an odd look, I just grinned at her, what the heck. massage was normal, until it wasn't. Next thing I knew her hands were on my junk, I sat up part way, looked over to see my wife, wide eyed looking my way, boobs bare and the guy's hand down there. Got that stopped, since then, we check people out more carefully. Ads in the back of flyers in small stores are best to avoid.
I took a couple room with my wife once in Singapore. Over the years, I have had massages in Thailand, China and now in Singapore where we resided at the time, I was thinking, I wonder how they'd compare to China and Bangkok.
The woman in question was very ugly but at one point, I felt a hand brush something it had no business brushing and tremors occurred. I thought, did I imagine that?
My discipline went went North so did the Crown Jewels.Surely she knew my wife was beside. I looked up at the wife, blissfully unaware and started at masseuse. Her expression was as blank as her filthy mind.
Long story short, I was back two days later to ask for the woman and my suspicion was confirmed. I don't think I have had a better massage to be honest.
The massage parlour in question is a high end one in a high end area of Singapore.
I was asked by my Male masseuse in India, and politely said no. What is so bad? Clearly it was a professionalism/cultural thing, he was not trying to advance sexually. You two need to grow up and get over yourselves, and ACTUALLY "find the humor in every situation" instead of crying over spilt milk (or the lack there of)
I can understand you being caught by surprise! It would make me probably yell at her to stop ! I'm a massage therapist in the USA and it's no wonder why Asian men that come to America expect a happy ending after their massage! Totally disgusting! I just tell them I'm calling the police and massage is over! I didn't sign up for jacking off men period! That's NOT my cup of tea !
I myself am from Holland, but every year I come to Russia for work. So massage parlors I like most of the rest options. In Moscow there are many, choose any of from 3000 the price. As for my TOP salons it is SOHO SPA and ETALON. The girls are beautiful, the interior is expensive, the hookah is excellent.
I do not understand what is the concern of the author. I often visit Moscow for work, and erotic massage salons are a great way to relax. The only problem is that not all salons are honest. Sometimes spread photos are not real girls, or wind up the price of the declared. My favorites, proven salons: VANILLA, PODIUM and IMPERIUM
Wow unacceptable for sure ! I have had clients tell me stories about this happening in China.. It's no wonder they come to the USA to set up shop! I would if freaked out if someone tried this on me while trying to have a relaxing massage!
This is so funny that you both were shocked by this. Hun, I work at in the spa at one of the more higher end hotel/casinos on the Las Vegas strip. This stuff happens all the time and in the USA even! It all depends on the therapist - many do not offer this at ALL and will be offended or even end the session if you ask. Those who are a bit more open minded will drop a hint. What goes on between two consenting adults behind closed doors is between then. It's not that big of a deal.
I don't know if the comments are racist or what but these Masseuse or Massage Therapists are just making a living. I been offered drinks or desserts because the waiters/waitresses was hoping for more tips if you ordered more. Sure aggressive selling tactics is annoying but it works sometimes. People are just trying to make a living so they do whatever it takes.
Yeah. Hong Kong, Singapore and Indonesia are more respectful. It hasn't happen to be either when i went to those places.
I agree. That is why this isn't a big deal to me. For example, Waiters/Waitresses will offer you appetizers, deserts or drinks because they are hoping that if you order more then they would get more tips
I heard something different is that sexual favors became a commodity in Japan. At least for the japanese citizens where you can go in and get serviced then walk out. It is like Breakfast, Lunch or dinner where you need to go eat but this is not usually open to foreigners just like certain nude hot springs in Japan
It is out of SPG hands if something is normalized in a country. Just because an American company have locations around the world doesn't mean they all need to obey US laws because it is not illegal or even if it was illegal then it won't be enforced. Some countries have laws that are not enforced even if it is illegal. What are you going to do? Sue the Chinese government? There are also Lobbying in China and just like the USA or everywhere else in the world where you can get away with something if you pay a pretty penny to them just to do a favor for you.
You're a loser, who cares, just decline, don't go back. Yet here you are writing a post like it's some kind of major issue, on your little implied moral crusade.
Go back to church, jerk off in your bible instead.