Flying With A Baby: Lap Infant Vs. Buying A Seat?

On Southwest if you fly with a kid you're pretty much guaranteed the empty seat as long as the plane isn't completely full - what nut is going to want to sit between two parents holding a baby?

On AA I found there's a software that would block the seat next to me provided there were a bunch of empty seats on the plane. Though again, if the plane is completely or close to full can't count on that.

I sometimes split the difference (we have twins) and we'd get 3 seats for the four of us, guaranteeing a place for the kids to sit. Especially on longer flights. It's not fun having no place to put them down

Yeah, American blocks the seat next to you if you have a lap infant unless the plane is full, which is fantastic. They'll probably let you bring on your car seat at boarding if it looks like that seat will remain available, so definitely worth bringing your car seat to the gate (while also being prepared to gate check).

Agree with most of these points. Would also note that buying a seat for a baby is also a way (albeit an expensive one) to transport a car seat in-cabin (and therefore not check it), for those who both need to bring a car seat and also hate checking bags. Granted this is a relatively niche group given how much having an infant with you impedes any speed gained by avoiding checked bags, but one that I fall into frequently.

I love European business class with the middle seat reserved for my lap infant 🙂

We travelled to the US last year and had a lap infant in domestic first class (Seattle to Bozeman) and an extra seat in a row of three in economy class (Bozeman to Chicago): we preferred economy class.

Outside of the US, airlines actually offer seatbelts for lap infants.
For intercontinental/transatlantic travel, we don’t buy an extra (business class) seat as the infant is sleeping in the cod.

One of our favorite hacks was always buying our kids a seat on Southwest, and then checking with the gate agent if there were empty seats. If there weren't, we'd keep the ticket. If there were, then we'd refund their ticket, carry the car seat into the aircraft and have them seat next to us in their own seat for free. Nice selection on the Doona. Miles is adorable.

Thanks for pointing out that a lap infant isn’t inherently unsafe. Some commenters on travel blogs make out like there are babies hurtling through cabins on the regular. We all take risks in day to day life. As you correctly point out, getting in a car is way more hazardous to a baby. So until those commenters swear off autos with their kids, they can keep their opinions to themselves. Although I suspect most of them don’t have kids.

For transatlantic business class travel with an infant: I recommend Austrians mini business class on the 777-200 which consists of one row (i.e. row 8) between the galley and premium Economy.

Qatar qsuites worked great when my child was under 2 years old. With the side storage holder closed down and some divider cushion given by the flight attendant, it was just wide enough for both of us to sleep comfortably!

Own seat (or guaranteed bassinet for sleeping) is essential for parental sanity.

While a baby fits in a bassinet its an excellent option for widebody travel. AF's middle two bulkhead J seats are excellent in this regard. The bassinets are recessed into the bulkhead (not a hanging cot). So for two adults and one or two babies (we have twins) its an amazing option. Both J seats in the middle section have bassinets. IME, sadly most kids grow out of the bassinet long before they turn two.

Was this in a single window seat or would it work for a pair of the middles (rear-facing close together)? We are flying QSuites infant-in-arms with a ~1 year old next spring and debating the best place to sit (back to back individual seats or a double seat in the middle). Having the ability for a child to lay next to one of us would be ideal.

I don’t like the concept of a lap child both for safety reasons and also in respect of the impact on other passengers. Imagine in coach being seated next to a stranger with a lap infant …

When I used to purchase a seat for our son that was under 2, I was told by a flight attendant that they had to sit in their own seat during take off, no matter what. I'm not sure if this is really a law, but I found this silly. Because at a certain age they will not stay still, and they can barely fit in the seat. So this is something to keep in mind if you buy a seat and do not bring a car seat.

2 x Points of note for me having traversed this path 2 years before Lucky

Everywhere (granted, only Europe, SE Asia and Australia) I've flown apart from North America requires a lap belt extension to help secure the infant if travelling on the lap. So they're more restrained than just being held.

For anything other than economy seats, confirming how a car seat or CARES system (when they're older) works or is secured can be challenging, so it may come down to selecting long haul economy with the child having their own seat, or long haul business class with more space, comfort, privacy, but as a lap child.

For short flights (1-3 hours) I did a lap baby because I didn't want to pay for the extra seat.

However, when I LAX to Europe I paid for an extra seat. I'm glad I did too, I couldn't imagine having my 9 month old sitting on my lap for 12 hours. He would sit on my lap during take off/landings and then once the belt sign was off we used a inflatable bed thing that let him lay down on the seat between wife and I. He enjoyed it when napping.

Most international airlines (not US unfortunately) have discounted airfare for children under 12 years - and it can be substantial savings. When my kids were under 12 and we were traveling internationally, I would book through Air France or KLM directly instead of Delta (we are Delta loyalists). I was able to get a Delta child discount on an international flight once when I called them and requested the child fare...only worked once. I have noticed that international airlines also have guaranteed we sit together... which US airlines don't do. Recently when flying Emirates and Qatar, I saw they specifically block seats for parents flying with youngsters - they just treat families so much better than our airlines!! As for purchasing a seat for our kids when they were younger than 2, they were great at sitting on our laps. I always brought their own backpack for them to carry and it included special snacks they didn't get at home and a new toy. They loved to see what they got!

We always purchased a seat for our kids both for safety and for our collective comfort. It probably didn't hurt that the car seat was familiar to the child.

We found it most difficult to travel when the kids were between 1 and 2 - old enough to walk but not old enough to talk and tell us what they wanted or how they were doing. Finger food, activities like playdough and scribbling books, and even electronics went a long way to keep them occupied in-flight.

Good luck and enjoy the moments.

My fondest travel memories with the kids were mileage (and lounge) runs we took together, including a same day turn in SIN with my then 11 year old, and countless LAX runs to plane spot from the park in front of the In-n-Out.

In the US lap children are not allowed to be belted, restrained, or otherwise tied to the parents while they are required to be in Europe (when the seatbelt sign is on).

We never did a lap infant. Agree that the onboard safety consideration is real but small. When traveling to and from the airport and at our destination we wanted to be sure to have a car seat that is properly fitted and maintained as well as incorporating the safety features we desired. Having your child in a proper car seat is always a real safety issue so buying a seat on the plane was the right answer for us. Some may state we could check the car seat. We were not willing to roll the dice the car seat would get to the destination each and every time.

Retired F/A here... PLEASE PLEASE ! for your comfort and EVERYONE's safety... BUY the seat. Like experience tells parents..those 25 lb infants become incredibly uncomfortable pretty quickly. More importantly, should the aircraft encounter severe turbulence, that un-restrained child becomes a missile flying from your arms into the ceiling and into other passengers. Want to take that risk ? I thought not

Agree with other parents here. One addition that may be helpful to note: you can get a bassinet without paying for an additional seat, though sometimes the bassinet's location means that you have to pay extra for the adult's seat assignment....

My wife and I sat in the middle section of Qsuites with our baby and it worked great. She was able to sleep between us. Still obviously a long flight from DOH to US with a 11 month old but I wouldn’t want to do it any other way.

I just love the matching of the pics and captions for the first 2 pics.

Have you had your kid checked by a doctor recently? His forehead is almost half his face (maybe it’s a bad photo angle) but sometimes it can be a sign of a hormone imbalance. Best to get it checked early than late.

something to consider is whether or not an international airline will accept your child seat. My 4 yo son flew to the UK for the first time this summer and BA was fickle with the car seat. Although it's FAA-approved for the US and flights from the US, it wasn't guaranteed on BA. I flew a BA A320 to Scotland and the flight crew didn't say a word. We flew a BA A319 back to LHR and the flight crew said nothing until after my son was already strapped in (they definitely saw me walk into the cabin with it). Because it was not approved ahead of time, they stuck it randomly somewhere during the flight and in the lavatory during landing.

We flew VX from LHR to LAX and the bag drop said the seat was ok, the gate agent said it was ok, but when we were in the cabin and my son was strapped in, the lead FA questioned it. After giving her the brand, she looked it up and gave approval.

TL;DR: YMMV when using a US-approved car seat on an international carrier.

My son recently turned 2. He flew 29 flights as a lap infant, including two flights three days before his second birthday. The 29 flights included two trips to the Philippines from Texas. I’m just bummed that his FF account has no miles yet, but he’ll start accruing later this year.

People with infants are better off buying three seats in a row. You can still get Main cabin extra - just not the exit row. Internationally, get three Economy plus in the middle.

Infant is better and safer in a car seat in a seat. See it all the time - a infant being passed between 2 parents in F. Always thought - they would be better in coach. AA's F doesn't have that much pitch these days.

There is no choice about the car seat. It is required.

@Lucky -- interesting article. Thanks for that.

Are you able to elaborate on this part: "you can always bring a car seat to place on the seat (assuming it’s compliant with airline regulations)." Do different airlines allow different car seats? Is there one particular model that's recommended? Thanks ...

Fly economy, sit in the bigger leg room section and buy an extra seat. Then put the car seat on it 🙂

That made our lives infinitely easier with toddlers. We almost never had them as lap infants once they were a little bigger.

Agree!! So much better than first.

Agree with this. Australia is very finicky and will only let you use a car seat in certain rows (from memory you can’t have people behind you maybe?!). Learnt this while boarding a jet star flight to Hawaii…

Canada requires a certification from Canada to allow a car seat in. Learnt this while boarding a porter flight to Toronto from ord ….

So many of you are conflating safety and comfort. The last fatality from a US plane crash was in 2009. For everyone's comfort, buy the seat drive, or stay home.

If you bring a car seat it has to be compliant ( info on airline website) and you must purchase a seat which it must be able to fit on.

An infant ( under 2)generally cannot sit in its own seat for safety reasons and use the belt, and especially a business or first class seat. In addition there’s compliance with the overhead emergency oxygen.

Or not fly, wait until your child is old enough to be able to behave on an airplane? You know, like considerate people? Nahhh, you got IGs to post.

Factors not covered in this article - nuisance to other passengers, air craft type (Besides bassinets), and class of service. Delta platinum status holder. 15 month old - 24lbs. Would never put my partner in a 3 seat row with our son as a lap passenger. 3 seat rows always - paid ticket (saw the doona in the pic). On 717, a220, and E175 we use two seat delta comfort-everything else we go first class. On transcontinental and long haul we use lie flat options - next year we will reassess. Maybe premium economy
(Long haul) with a paid seat for the kid.

Yes true the only reason to fly with a child is to post on instagram. Trolls gonna troll I guess.

Or just to be considerate of the 200 other people..but yeah, I'm the troll, not the one person who narcissistically insists on leisure travel before their child can control themselves, but somehow it's the other 199 passengers fault for not enjoying constant crying.

How uncomfortable for him and whoever was unlucky enough to he holding him.

So our daughter has traveled as a lap infant since she was 3 months old. We don’t have instagram. So what’s your comeback for that? We travel because we enjoy it and we want to share the experience with our daughter. She’s not old enough to understand that at the moment, but the more times she gets on an airplane, the better she gets.

From what I remember, something to consider is a lot of airlines don’t allow car seats in business class.

We’ve traveled a lot with our daughter as a lap infant (over 30 long/short/seaplane) segments. We never felt unsafe with her in our arms. This trip to the UK was her first in her own seat. She just turned 2 so we were forced to buy her own seat. We just kept her busy with coloring and other things to keep her distracted. She’s a great traveler and hopefully she’ll get better as time goes and the more we do it.

IF you use a car seat it is required to be FAA/EU compliant, but they are NOT required.

Airlines should be required by law to provide a regular seat for infants and children free of charge. They should also be required by to provide a child car seat device for free.

He’s actually an excellent traveler, the flight attendants constantly commented on how great he was an how they wished all babies were that comfortable with flying!

How about this ? Why in the world is everyone dragging a < 2 year old all over the world on planes on their lap in economy UNLESS ITS ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY... Stay at home until your child is older, or, if you must travel, leave your very young child with someone else. Unless you are moving from one place to another and can't drive, it's a dis-service to the child to drag them everywhere with you. I love the people that go backpacking in Nepal and bring their 1 year old with them "to see the world". Very selfish and self entitled people out there.

No they shouldn't. Parent should be required to PAY for a seat for anyone over 1 day old. PERIOD.

We did a lap flight once with our now 2.5 year old and swore never again, he just would not stay still. Thankfully the flight was only 2 hours.

You are a narrow minded person, and rude on top of it.

As a recent new parent: buy the seat. Every time. It's just so much easier to have a dedicated place to put your child, and as they get older (above one) they are going to start moving around much more and it's supremely difficult to keep them satisfied while staying in your lap the whole time. You also get more baggage allowance and a place to put the car seat (and not check it) to the extent you want to travel with one anyways.

On our baby's first roundtrip flight, our outbound we bought a seat in Economy (MCE). On the return we did lap child in United 787-10 Polaris business. I in complete seriousness would choose 3 seats in American economy over 2 United Polaris seats if I had to do it again. In Polaris my baby slept on the seat while I crouched on the floor next to it.

Huh? Are you on drugs?

+1 -- this is a point Lucky didn't cover. Even if the kid won't sleep, it's super helpful to have a bit of extra space to climb around. If he's never going to sleep in the car seat, get him a CARES harness as soon as he weighs enough so you can have more real estate for him to move around without the car seat

It still baffles me that having a lap infant is allowed but holding a backpack is not. Any explanation why?

Apparently kids under 2 years old are NOT allowed to have their on seat in Lufthansa Business class.

Our son was 21 months old when we recently flew LH transatlantic and he's a big guy, too big for the bassinet anyways, so we decided to buy him his own seat. We were flying in business class on award tickets, but I couldn't book a seat online for an infant under 2, so I had to call Lufthansa to book him.

When I called they said there was no award availability for his ticket (even though I saw it online) and proceeded to sell me a cash ticket for around $2500.

After boarding the flight the purser came around, with an iPad showing LH official rules, and told us he wouldn't be allowed to use the seat because kids under 2 can't operate the seat controls in case of emergency (of course a kid 1 day older can, right?). She said she would write a report and we'd get our money back because they shouldn't have sold us the seat in the first place, but 2 months later that's yet to happen.

They told us to use the bassinet, but then realized he's too big and too heavy for it, so we were told to just hold the baby. During the flight we had a couple of flight attendants come up to my wife and warn her about the infant lying on her seat when she put him down to just take off her sweater or grab something for the overhead bins.

They actually wanted us to hold a 30lb baby for 10 hours after paying to buy him a biz class seat... Go figure.

great hack - did this ever backfire ie late boarders joining and filling up the plane?

Hii!
We'll be traveling to Europe next year with our son, he'll be 22 months at the time. I always envisioned buying him a ticket, given the long flight and that he'll be like huge by then, no way lap would work comfortably for anyone. I did not however, plan on bringing a carseat. He hates being in the carseat normally and I can only imagine shrieking. Additionally, I really was planning on getting him one of those inflatable beds (same for older sister) and booking on an airline that allows them. I am now wondering if because he'll still be under 2, they'll make us have him in a car-seat or wear some sort of restraint device and not allow him to simply wear his seatbelt. Thoughts?

Having done several economy flights with our daughter aged between about 6 months and just under 2, always as a lap infant, I'd advise caution on such a blanket statement.
As Ben said, the bassinet only really works when the baby is just a few months old. As soon as they can sit up, it's a non-starter. Also bear in mind that the bassinet is up pretty high in full flow of any air con and can get pretty cold (we experienced this on a BA 787 to the point that we couldn't leave our daughter there even under a blanket).

Add to that the fact that the seats you sit in by the bassinet are always the ones with the fixed armrests and the IFE in the armrest, as soon as you have baby in arms, it actually turns out to be one of the least comfortable places to be as either baby is or you are wedged up against a solid armrest and there's no way for them to sprawl out. Longest 10 hours of my life were sitting with daughter, almost 2 years old, in one of these seats from India to UK. Boy was my bum numb by the end of that!

We found it much better to just have seats together on another flight and lucked out with an empty seat next to us where she could lie down, strapped in across the seats. Of course, that was wildly fortunate, having mot paid for the extra seat, but even without that, lying across 2 parents' laps on standard economy seats is better than the fixed armrest seats.

We have always been offered a seat belt extension though and I was very surprised to hear that these don't exist in the US.

Although not directly the point of this post, after she turned 2 and we had to pay for a seat, we found a big blow up cube thing, which goes in front of a window seat, which effectively extends the seat into a much bigger surface very helpful for her to lie out on while still strapped in.

Christmas trip UK - New Zealand with a 6 month old lap infant also booked... I'll try to report back on bum numbness 😉

Congrats on Diamond, sir! Now, work towards invitation-only OMAAT 360!

Or leave them at home and spare us all

I used the Cosco branded ones. The one for younger toddlers and the larger one. Both are fairly light weight. I used both until my son was about 40 lbs. At that point, he wanted to be seated like a big kid, which we didn’t mind. But definitely from page 2-4, we used the car seat.

So, here's the big question. Would you put your infant in a separate car seat? You can, presumably, afford the extra cost. Or, do you save money, knowingly putting your infant at (a maybe small, but clearly) additional risk.