I took a quick same day mileage run yesterday, which was, believe it or not, a first for me. Ever since United changed their routing rules to no longer allow convoluted routings, I haven’t been able to build very many routings that can’t be done in a single day. So I left my house at 5:30AM, and was in bed by 2:30AM. Gosh, compared to the usual eight segment mileage run involving a redeye, this was a breeze. Anyway, here are just a few quick observations:
- All four segments had the same exact sitcoms. That means I saw the same episode of The Big Bang Theory, Parks & Recreation, Chuck, and The Simpsons four times. While I’m pretty sure I know each word to each show by now, The Big Bang Theory and Parks & Recreation got funnier and funnier each time.
- For the first time in years, passengers in first class were paying attention to the safety video. Why? Because they were caught off guard by Jeff Smisek’s fruity new introduction at the beginning (yes, that head bob 13 seconds in drives me crazy!).
- I got stuck watching Toy Story 3 twice. It made me want to choke myself with Biscoffs (which are delicious, by the way). Fortunately I fell asleep both times as soon as Lotso Bear (“but everyone just calls me Lotso”) turned evil. Did I miss out?
- I’m starting to get a bit freaked out. I don’t know if I fly too much or what, but I can’t walk through the concourse at Dulles without recognizing at least a dozen people. Last night I ran into two pilots that live in Tampa, one flight attendant that lives in Tampa, a gate agent I know pretty well because he speaks German, the same flight attendant I had on a flight a week ago, and a few others. Freaky!
- United’s new Red Carpet Club alcohol pricing policy is idiotic. While “house” beer, wine, and (apparently) gin & tonic are free, I guested a friend into the RCC that wanted a drink. The premium drinks still require two drink chits (until they stop accepting them at the end of the month), but they raised the prices on the drinks that are charged for. How stupid is that? If “house” wine and beer are free, people are less willing to pay a premium for other drinks, not more. So apparently they changed the price on some drinks from $5 to $7.50, and somehow the lady working the bar found that to be completely logical.
- Despite unlimited domestic upgrades, there were four empty seats in first class last night from Washington to Tampa, which is only an Airbus 320. I had all of row three to myself.
I’ll leave my closing statement to Lotso:

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